(no subject)
Well, dust off that spot and let me tell you a story about a guy named Jack, and his sister named Jill.
For the longest time, they hated each other with a passion that could destroy small cities, never mind a cramped two-story household in the middle of Suburbia.
They'd go to great lengths to hurt each other, and neither of them would know why. And everytime they hurt each other, they'd hurt themselves, too.
Flash forward a few years, and the brother and sister have grown up, taking with them just a little bit of wisdom. Though fighting broke out occasionally, they were mostly fights worth arguing about, things that needed to be settled. They wouldn't fight with fists and weapons (not as often, anyway), but with words.
Throughout those years afterward, the brother would learn some hard and painful lessons about the importance of family, and would realize the folly of fighting. He would realize that he had a hand in directly hurting his sister, and he could no longer bear the shame. He vowed never to hurt his sister again, no matter how much she'd hurt him.
Though many a time he'd break that vow, he'd always try to stick with it, no matter how hard it was.
In time, he proved to his sister that it wasn't hate he felt for her, but rather love. And the two reconciled, and became fast friends. It couldn't come soon enough, for soon after, various things would test their faith and themselves.
But they'd always have each other to hang onto.
Flash forward again, and the little, bratty girl has blossomed into a mischeivous, happy young woman, sixteen years of age.
The little boy? Well...he's learning. Still is, as a matter of fact. He'll never admit to himself that he's a man, and the thing is, maybe he doesn't want to. But the attitude's there. He just refuses to acknowledge it.
He helps his sister zip up her sweet sixteen dress, and becomes the first person to see how beautifully she's grown.
With a lump in his throat, he says, "I'm proud of you."
And so he is.
Happy sweet sixteen, Jillian. The party was fun as hell. And it's weird...Texas and New Jersey seemed to come together during those nights when we were all together, from Thursday till today (the party was on Saturday). Nothing else but the word, "Perfect" could describe it.
Which explains the deflated feeling I'm having. I miss those good times. Not just the party, but every happy memory I've ever had came pouring in over the past few days. Friends from NJ, from TX, friends in Joeyteel's IRC channel, all the laughs, shits, giggles I've had...
But an awesome cartoon once said that "People are not ruled by their memories," so, I really shouldn't let mine take me over.
But it's so damn hard not to miss em. Good times indeed.
This just might be the last entry I make on my LJ. Partly because it reminds me of how much of an idiot I've been for taking such great things for granted. I'll still be blogging, though:
http://www.xanga.com/reclusivefortunecookie
http://www.myspace.com/reclusivefortunecookie
And who knows, maybe I'm just being stupid again and I'll come back to LJ full force.
But for now, sleep.
Ja ne!
~Jack
P.S. This part's for a special person:
It took me 5 years to meet her.
6 years to say I thought she was mean.
8 years to say I was jealous of her.
10 years to lump her as "just another person."
12 years to realize I was an idiot.
13 years to realize I really did want her as a friend.
14 years to realize I would've wanted her as more.
15 1/2 years to accept that I can't.
16 years to realize I wanted to be there for her, regardless.
17 years to realize I took her friendship for granted.
And 18 years to realize that from 5-present, I always did love her, in my own way.
She's been a part of my life since as far back as I can remember, and though there's things I wish I could've said, in hindsight, it maybe would've been best if I didn't.
Because, who knows? If I did, I might've never learned what a gift she really was. She's one of the few girls that have helped have a direct hand in shaping who I am, and even though she'll never know it (she barely reads LJ...and the fact that this is the first post in 6 months won't help, either =P), I guess this has been long overdue.
Thank you for being my friend. I love you; always have, always will.
When two worlds collide, sometimes it can be a very explosive experience. Sometimes, it can be a beautiful thing.
Sometimes, it can be both.
I'm still learning. Pray for me.
For the longest time, they hated each other with a passion that could destroy small cities, never mind a cramped two-story household in the middle of Suburbia.
They'd go to great lengths to hurt each other, and neither of them would know why. And everytime they hurt each other, they'd hurt themselves, too.
Flash forward a few years, and the brother and sister have grown up, taking with them just a little bit of wisdom. Though fighting broke out occasionally, they were mostly fights worth arguing about, things that needed to be settled. They wouldn't fight with fists and weapons (not as often, anyway), but with words.
Throughout those years afterward, the brother would learn some hard and painful lessons about the importance of family, and would realize the folly of fighting. He would realize that he had a hand in directly hurting his sister, and he could no longer bear the shame. He vowed never to hurt his sister again, no matter how much she'd hurt him.
Though many a time he'd break that vow, he'd always try to stick with it, no matter how hard it was.
In time, he proved to his sister that it wasn't hate he felt for her, but rather love. And the two reconciled, and became fast friends. It couldn't come soon enough, for soon after, various things would test their faith and themselves.
But they'd always have each other to hang onto.
Flash forward again, and the little, bratty girl has blossomed into a mischeivous, happy young woman, sixteen years of age.
The little boy? Well...he's learning. Still is, as a matter of fact. He'll never admit to himself that he's a man, and the thing is, maybe he doesn't want to. But the attitude's there. He just refuses to acknowledge it.
He helps his sister zip up her sweet sixteen dress, and becomes the first person to see how beautifully she's grown.
With a lump in his throat, he says, "I'm proud of you."
And so he is.
Happy sweet sixteen, Jillian. The party was fun as hell. And it's weird...Texas and New Jersey seemed to come together during those nights when we were all together, from Thursday till today (the party was on Saturday). Nothing else but the word, "Perfect" could describe it.
Which explains the deflated feeling I'm having. I miss those good times. Not just the party, but every happy memory I've ever had came pouring in over the past few days. Friends from NJ, from TX, friends in Joeyteel's IRC channel, all the laughs, shits, giggles I've had...
But an awesome cartoon once said that "People are not ruled by their memories," so, I really shouldn't let mine take me over.
But it's so damn hard not to miss em. Good times indeed.
This just might be the last entry I make on my LJ. Partly because it reminds me of how much of an idiot I've been for taking such great things for granted. I'll still be blogging, though:
http://www.xanga.com/reclusivefortunecookie
http://www.myspace.com/reclusivefortunecookie
And who knows, maybe I'm just being stupid again and I'll come back to LJ full force.
But for now, sleep.
Ja ne!
~Jack
P.S. This part's for a special person:
It took me 5 years to meet her.
6 years to say I thought she was mean.
8 years to say I was jealous of her.
10 years to lump her as "just another person."
12 years to realize I was an idiot.
13 years to realize I really did want her as a friend.
14 years to realize I would've wanted her as more.
15 1/2 years to accept that I can't.
16 years to realize I wanted to be there for her, regardless.
17 years to realize I took her friendship for granted.
And 18 years to realize that from 5-present, I always did love her, in my own way.
She's been a part of my life since as far back as I can remember, and though there's things I wish I could've said, in hindsight, it maybe would've been best if I didn't.
Because, who knows? If I did, I might've never learned what a gift she really was. She's one of the few girls that have helped have a direct hand in shaping who I am, and even though she'll never know it (she barely reads LJ...and the fact that this is the first post in 6 months won't help, either =P), I guess this has been long overdue.
Thank you for being my friend. I love you; always have, always will.
When two worlds collide, sometimes it can be a very explosive experience. Sometimes, it can be a beautiful thing.
Sometimes, it can be both.
I'm still learning. Pray for me.