The Winners of the 12th Challenge Are... (With Banners)
So... the end of the 12th Challenge has ended, and I have (with Ianto being so kind to keep the tea flowing) tallied the results... and I even did the banners... see, no waiting on me this time kids!!
So on with it!
I used to have dreams where we talked about this thing that sparks between us. Where I would tell you I loved you, you’d smile, and I wouldn’t burn anymore. I wouldn’t feel like this fire is going to eat me alive from the inside out; like I could escape from this unscathed.
But now when I dream I always feel like I’m drowning. Choking on unsaid words, and all the almost moments I’ve let fade away into nothing.
When I wake everything freezes up again, solidifies into a contained mass, and I can face you again. Look you in the eye, touch your hand, or stand at your side without breaking. But every day I get a little colder. Now it’s more like frozen shards of impossible want coursing through my veins, instead of the fire that used to rage.
If I had the strength I would tell you all this, or maybe it’s my strength that stops me. If you knew, if I told you everything, I think I could have you. That’s where all my self-control goes. Because you need what I can’t give; you are what I can’t be.
I’m somebody you can never really know, using someone else’s name. The person you think I am is just a shell of carefully constructed lies, and that’s how it has to stay.
It’s better this way.
Jack returns from a time travel job he had no choice but to attend to only to find the one person he promised to come back to is gone... as gone as any person could be without being dead.
Martha told him the news, "Sometimes she's all right, helps us with some of our cases, but we don't know how to control it. Her episodes are entirely at random... she's not safe. Jack, she might not even recognize you."
Jack steps through the door without another word where an elderly lady is standing by, but sees Martha and lets him pass.
Jack's words die on his lips once he sees her sitting on a rocking chair in front of the fireplace, her hair falling on her waist and her eyes barely aware of the world.
"Gwen?" He bends on one knee, pulling her hands in his. She doesn't even look at him.
His guilt gnaws on his existence.
All she had wanted was for him to love her, to be with her and all he could give her was his protection, his promise to love her, but nothing more. He couldn't be with her. But then, in that moment, he would've given an entire galaxy in order to turn back time and give her what she wanted, everything she wanted, including him.
But now it was too late.
She was gone.
"We'll keep trying." Martha promises him.
He pulls Gwen's hands to his lips and whispers, "I know we will."
“Gwen its better this way, you know it is.”
She looked at the ground, desperately blinking back tears, dreading what was to come.
“When I was away, all I wanted to do was come home to you, to come back. But it isn’t fair.
She looked up defiantly; a veiled attempted to stare him down.
“That’s it though, isn’t Jack, you think you know what’s best, what’s fair, but you don’t. You can’t. Everything you do, everything you say just hurt’s me all the more, twists the knife.
She pulled her hand from his and let it drop to her side.
“Maybe it is better this way, you’re cold and dark sometimes, and I don’t want to be.”
His hand clenched her, just as she went under.
Gwen snapped her head up and looked around, momentarily orienting herself. She had pulled another all-nighter at the Hub. She had chosen not to go home even after Jack had told her to go. She wondered when the last time she had actually seen the outside world.
Getting up, she saw it was 4 a.m.; no one would be coming in for hours. Wondering the stairs, Gwen let her mind wonder to the numb place that had been building for weeks. Rhys had pulled away saying he needed his space, working long hours once more. Owen and Tosh were gone, leaving Jack, Ianto and herself to defend whatever came next. And how the disasters came!
Sitting down on a step she stifled a small cry. How could she have crawled so far away from everything, to hole up inside herself? Darkness… that’s all there was. She felt like letting go, letting it take her. It had taken everything else why not go too?
She looked up to where Jack’s office was, wondering how he could go on. Wishing she could love him like he deserved. Wishing they were different. Wishing it all was different.
Wiping the tears that had leaked out, she put on water, starting what was Ianto’s morning task. She watched the kettle take the heat, expanding the water, building the pressure, longing to escape. How poetic, she thought bitterly.
Jack’s hand clenched her, just as she went under.
Why: I think this gives us an idea of what Jack was maybe thinking as his very life slipped away and knew Gwen was watching. Here he is giving himself all and all the while he must be wondering how Gwen must be feeling since he chose her to bring him to his, what he thinks, is his death. And perhaps I expounded a bit much... But that's my take.
Congrats to all, hope you join us next time for our 13th *whoooo aaaaaahhhh* challenge! Usual about banners, take, comment, host on your own. Don't forget to shine them sometimes too!!
So on with it!
I used to have dreams where we talked about this thing that sparks between us. Where I would tell you I loved you, you’d smile, and I wouldn’t burn anymore. I wouldn’t feel like this fire is going to eat me alive from the inside out; like I could escape from this unscathed.
But now when I dream I always feel like I’m drowning. Choking on unsaid words, and all the almost moments I’ve let fade away into nothing.
When I wake everything freezes up again, solidifies into a contained mass, and I can face you again. Look you in the eye, touch your hand, or stand at your side without breaking. But every day I get a little colder. Now it’s more like frozen shards of impossible want coursing through my veins, instead of the fire that used to rage.
If I had the strength I would tell you all this, or maybe it’s my strength that stops me. If you knew, if I told you everything, I think I could have you. That’s where all my self-control goes. Because you need what I can’t give; you are what I can’t be.
I’m somebody you can never really know, using someone else’s name. The person you think I am is just a shell of carefully constructed lies, and that’s how it has to stay.
It’s better this way.
Jack returns from a time travel job he had no choice but to attend to only to find the one person he promised to come back to is gone... as gone as any person could be without being dead.
Martha told him the news, "Sometimes she's all right, helps us with some of our cases, but we don't know how to control it. Her episodes are entirely at random... she's not safe. Jack, she might not even recognize you."
Jack steps through the door without another word where an elderly lady is standing by, but sees Martha and lets him pass.
Jack's words die on his lips once he sees her sitting on a rocking chair in front of the fireplace, her hair falling on her waist and her eyes barely aware of the world.
"Gwen?" He bends on one knee, pulling her hands in his. She doesn't even look at him.
His guilt gnaws on his existence.
All she had wanted was for him to love her, to be with her and all he could give her was his protection, his promise to love her, but nothing more. He couldn't be with her. But then, in that moment, he would've given an entire galaxy in order to turn back time and give her what she wanted, everything she wanted, including him.
But now it was too late.
She was gone.
"We'll keep trying." Martha promises him.
He pulls Gwen's hands to his lips and whispers, "I know we will."
“Gwen its better this way, you know it is.”
She looked at the ground, desperately blinking back tears, dreading what was to come.
“When I was away, all I wanted to do was come home to you, to come back. But it isn’t fair.
She looked up defiantly; a veiled attempted to stare him down.
“That’s it though, isn’t Jack, you think you know what’s best, what’s fair, but you don’t. You can’t. Everything you do, everything you say just hurt’s me all the more, twists the knife.
She pulled her hand from his and let it drop to her side.
“Maybe it is better this way, you’re cold and dark sometimes, and I don’t want to be.”
His hand clenched her, just as she went under.
Gwen snapped her head up and looked around, momentarily orienting herself. She had pulled another all-nighter at the Hub. She had chosen not to go home even after Jack had told her to go. She wondered when the last time she had actually seen the outside world.
Getting up, she saw it was 4 a.m.; no one would be coming in for hours. Wondering the stairs, Gwen let her mind wonder to the numb place that had been building for weeks. Rhys had pulled away saying he needed his space, working long hours once more. Owen and Tosh were gone, leaving Jack, Ianto and herself to defend whatever came next. And how the disasters came!
Sitting down on a step she stifled a small cry. How could she have crawled so far away from everything, to hole up inside herself? Darkness… that’s all there was. She felt like letting go, letting it take her. It had taken everything else why not go too?
She looked up to where Jack’s office was, wondering how he could go on. Wishing she could love him like he deserved. Wishing they were different. Wishing it all was different.
Wiping the tears that had leaked out, she put on water, starting what was Ianto’s morning task. She watched the kettle take the heat, expanding the water, building the pressure, longing to escape. How poetic, she thought bitterly.
Jack’s hand clenched her, just as she went under.
Why: I think this gives us an idea of what Jack was maybe thinking as his very life slipped away and knew Gwen was watching. Here he is giving himself all and all the while he must be wondering how Gwen must be feeling since he chose her to bring him to his, what he thinks, is his death. And perhaps I expounded a bit much... But that's my take.
Congrats to all, hope you join us next time for our 13th *whoooo aaaaaahhhh* challenge! Usual about banners, take, comment, host on your own. Don't forget to shine them sometimes too!!