Hello Livejournal.
I haven't updated in a really long time.
I thought I'd make a post and let everyone know that I am still alive. haha
The computer I have been using doesn't really like livejournal too much. But for some reason it happened to be nice today and let me use it! Yay for that!
Hopefully someday when I get some spare cash I'll be able to start saving for a new computer. *sigh*
I haven't been up to a whole lot. I don't really like North Carolina at all. In fact, I am missing Arizona terribly. You'd think it'd get easier with time. But the more time that passes...the more my heart aches for home.
I haven't really made any friends here.
I mean, I've met a few people here. But not really anybody who is worthy to be in my presence on a regular basis. hah ;op
But I also did not come here to make friends, although I am lonely every minute...it's for the best that I take this time out for myself.
I'm still struggling to have even the slightest feeling of independence.
Working on getting healthy, while being horribly sick in he mean time.
(Also having to get 3 molars ripped out of my mouth this Wednesday. No need to ask how nervous I am. :o/)
It's been rough. But I'm quite the fighter.
I'm struggling to part with the pessimist side of me. As well as so many other parts of me.
It's been a lot of work. Life moves so fast...but time goes so slow. Sometimes it really starts to drag you down. It's hard to keep your head up. But I'm trying.
Doctors here are also morons.
North Carolina is a LOT slower paced than Arizona. I was surprised. I was hoping that the whole "get better" thing would take a few months. Who knew it'd take so long. Months between appointments is ridiculous. Especially when you're not feeling well inbetween.
In time though. Things will change.
Jonah is getting so big. It's been amazing to watch him grow. We've come across a few problems. Mainly behavior. And adjusting. Taking care of myself and him at the same time has been a real struggle. Some days, I just feel like I can't do it. Others are great. But the inconsistency in that is a real problem.
I've had to kick myself in the ass quite a few times to keep myself up.
Jonah is still not talking. And I get discouraged quite a bit because he's so stubborn. I try to help but it seems it always ends up in a little anger party between us. He's learning though...slowly.
I've also been slacking on the potty training and taking away that god damn bottle! I made excuses. First, he wasn't ready for potty training. Then I let him keep the bottle out of guilt. Because its a comfort thing for him. And he has been through so many big changes. I felt I needed to give him that comfort he wanted to have.
But then it became more of a convenience for me.
If I was up and sick, nauseous or just curled up in a ball dyin on the couch. I gave in to the bottle. Because it put him to bed...and I didn't have to hear him scream for 4 hours straight.
*sigh* No more of that though. As soon as I get my teeth out and am feeling a bit better we're getting everything straight.
My little boy will be 2 on September 17th.
Time surely has flown. And it sure has been a hell of a 2 years! We've been through a ton! I'm so amazed by how quickly he grows, and how much he has learned and how smart he is.
I wish he could stay my little baby forever. :o(
Alright. Time for me to get going. Nap time is over. hah
I thought I'd make a post and let everyone know that I am still alive. haha
The computer I have been using doesn't really like livejournal too much. But for some reason it happened to be nice today and let me use it! Yay for that!
Hopefully someday when I get some spare cash I'll be able to start saving for a new computer. *sigh*
I haven't been up to a whole lot. I don't really like North Carolina at all. In fact, I am missing Arizona terribly. You'd think it'd get easier with time. But the more time that passes...the more my heart aches for home.
I haven't really made any friends here.
I mean, I've met a few people here. But not really anybody who is worthy to be in my presence on a regular basis. hah ;op
But I also did not come here to make friends, although I am lonely every minute...it's for the best that I take this time out for myself.
I'm still struggling to have even the slightest feeling of independence.
Working on getting healthy, while being horribly sick in he mean time.
(Also having to get 3 molars ripped out of my mouth this Wednesday. No need to ask how nervous I am. :o/)
It's been rough. But I'm quite the fighter.
I'm struggling to part with the pessimist side of me. As well as so many other parts of me.
It's been a lot of work. Life moves so fast...but time goes so slow. Sometimes it really starts to drag you down. It's hard to keep your head up. But I'm trying.
Doctors here are also morons.
North Carolina is a LOT slower paced than Arizona. I was surprised. I was hoping that the whole "get better" thing would take a few months. Who knew it'd take so long. Months between appointments is ridiculous. Especially when you're not feeling well inbetween.
In time though. Things will change.
Jonah is getting so big. It's been amazing to watch him grow. We've come across a few problems. Mainly behavior. And adjusting. Taking care of myself and him at the same time has been a real struggle. Some days, I just feel like I can't do it. Others are great. But the inconsistency in that is a real problem.
I've had to kick myself in the ass quite a few times to keep myself up.
Jonah is still not talking. And I get discouraged quite a bit because he's so stubborn. I try to help but it seems it always ends up in a little anger party between us. He's learning though...slowly.
I've also been slacking on the potty training and taking away that god damn bottle! I made excuses. First, he wasn't ready for potty training. Then I let him keep the bottle out of guilt. Because its a comfort thing for him. And he has been through so many big changes. I felt I needed to give him that comfort he wanted to have.
But then it became more of a convenience for me.
If I was up and sick, nauseous or just curled up in a ball dyin on the couch. I gave in to the bottle. Because it put him to bed...and I didn't have to hear him scream for 4 hours straight.
*sigh* No more of that though. As soon as I get my teeth out and am feeling a bit better we're getting everything straight.
My little boy will be 2 on September 17th.
Time surely has flown. And it sure has been a hell of a 2 years! We've been through a ton! I'm so amazed by how quickly he grows, and how much he has learned and how smart he is.
I wish he could stay my little baby forever. :o(
Alright. Time for me to get going. Nap time is over. hah
