Everything doesn't have to be perfect...
...But I'd like it to be. If there's one thing I obsess over, it's perfection. I'm obsessive compulsive over a lot of things actually. A lot of times I won't even continue a project if I've already fucked it up. What can I say? I'm afraid to make mistakes.
Phew.
I feel a lot better after admitting that. Actually, after admitting that, I don't feel like being obsessive with perfection any more. Perfection is just one of those things that comes with time. You can work at it, and work at it, but because perfection is part luck, sometimes you just have to let go and put some faith into your actions and hope things turn out for the best. Or something like that.
These past days sucked. Last Friday I ate a lot of aspirin on an empty stomach to cure a migraine and ended up messing up my stomach big time. The jumbo fried chicken meal and gallons of water I had afterwards didn't help much either. Long story short, it's a week from when that happened, and I'm still recovering from it.
I had to go to emergency room a few days ago, and after some tests or whatever it looks like I managed to contract some kind of stomach virus/infection. Whoops. Remind me never to eat food again.
Alright so I'm on meds now and after a quick glance in the mirror I've realized just how much not being able to eat for a week has messed me up. My muscle mass and body fat have diminished a lot, and my skin's gotten a lot paler since I got sick; overall I look like a zombie, and thanks to the meds I've been on I've been lurching around like one too.
These meds suck. I can't think straight at all. Fuck that. I tried thinking gay and failed at that too. Overall I just can't think right now. I've got a lot on my mind right now but my body doesn't want to cooperate, these meds dull my ninja like senses and reflexes and make my tongue taste like mercury.
Oh yeah. And I'm moving next week. That means I've got about a week to get my strength up so I'll be able to pack and shit later. Sheeeeeeeeee-it. I couldn't have picked a better time to get zombie.
Phew.
I feel a lot better after admitting that. Actually, after admitting that, I don't feel like being obsessive with perfection any more. Perfection is just one of those things that comes with time. You can work at it, and work at it, but because perfection is part luck, sometimes you just have to let go and put some faith into your actions and hope things turn out for the best. Or something like that.
These past days sucked. Last Friday I ate a lot of aspirin on an empty stomach to cure a migraine and ended up messing up my stomach big time. The jumbo fried chicken meal and gallons of water I had afterwards didn't help much either. Long story short, it's a week from when that happened, and I'm still recovering from it.
I had to go to emergency room a few days ago, and after some tests or whatever it looks like I managed to contract some kind of stomach virus/infection. Whoops. Remind me never to eat food again.
Alright so I'm on meds now and after a quick glance in the mirror I've realized just how much not being able to eat for a week has messed me up. My muscle mass and body fat have diminished a lot, and my skin's gotten a lot paler since I got sick; overall I look like a zombie, and thanks to the meds I've been on I've been lurching around like one too.
These meds suck. I can't think straight at all. Fuck that. I tried thinking gay and failed at that too. Overall I just can't think right now. I've got a lot on my mind right now but my body doesn't want to cooperate, these meds dull my ninja like senses and reflexes and make my tongue taste like mercury.
Oh yeah. And I'm moving next week. That means I've got about a week to get my strength up so I'll be able to pack and shit later. Sheeeeeeeeee-it. I couldn't have picked a better time to get zombie.