Ouroboros
Title: Ouroboros
Pairing: Merlin/Arthur
Rating: PG
Warnings: Character death
Spoilers: Vague spoilers for various episodes up to 1x08
Authors notes: Slightly AU on one point of 1x08. And thanks to gregisamazing for the very quick beta. Also this is the main story but there are lots of smaller stories that I want to add to this at some point.
Summary: History sometimes repeats itself and then sometimes it doesn't.
Uther looks at his sleeping boy and feels his stony facade crumble. Arthur is only a few hours old but is already motherless. How can he, King Uther Pendragon, raise this child alone? He won’t have the time to play in the mud with Arthur nor will he have hours to listen to Arthur’s childish exuberances. He has to be strong and brave for a Camelot that is currently in turmoil.
It was that witch, Nimueh, who caused his beloved wife to die in childbirth. He does not know how Arthur survived. He remembers the fear of a few hours ago when he saw Gaius pull his still son out of Igraines bleeding body. He was blue and still and Uther could not hear any cries. He does not know how Gaius saved his newborn son but he is beyond grateful.
He comes closer to Arthur’s cot and listens with amazement to his sons’ steady breaths. Arthur is alive and that is all that matters.
His mind turns now to magic. Magic is clearly an evil beyond all others and must be eradicated.
Twenty years later
A gangly youth wanders towards Camelot.
A broad-shouldered man trains with his knights.
A great dragon stirs in the caverns beneath the castle.
*~*
Suddenly the peace that had enveloped Camelot for the last few years shatters. Danger seems to lurk around every corner. The road forward, which had once looked so certain, splits into many paths.
Arthur nearly dies. He cheats death repeatedly-mostly due to Merlin’s efforts. Even then, Arthur is constantly in danger and Nimueh can see the despair in the bags under Uther’s eyes and the sagging of his shoulders from some invisible weight. But he never connects all these sudden threats to Arthur’s life with Arthur’s new manservant. She is almost disappointed. Uther was always so good at spotting magic.
Another attempt on Arthur’s life fails due to Merlin’s interference.
Nimueh looks up from her scrying basin and smiles. She is patient. She has all the time in the world. Camelot will fall; she is sure of it.
*~*
Six months after Merlin’s Arrival
Morgana sits at her window brushing her hair whilst she looks at them.
Merlin and Arthur, a servant and a prince, two people who are not equals and will never be. Yet Arthur treats Merlin as an equal. He teases Merlin, attempts to teach him how to fight and goes out on a life-threatening mission to save Merlin’s life. Those are not the actions of a master; those are the actions of a friend.
She’s sometimes a little jealous that a lot of Arthur’s attention is directed towards somebody else rather than towards her. But at the same time there’s also some relief as Arthur can be a little overwhelming at times. She smiles gently and looks down at them. They’ve just returned from a hunt. Arthur says something and instead of looking deferential Merlin laughs. Other people might mistake the look on Arthur’s face for anger but Morgana sees Arthur’s amusement and can see how hard he is trying not to smile.
It is utterly confusing but at the same time it’s quite charming. Morgana has always believed that Arthur was a prat - well, she still thinks he's a prat - but not so much of one anymore. He is showing that one day he can be a great King. He looks at the servants now as people and not merely objects who are there to obey his orders.
Her thoughts turn to Uther. He has been like a father to her for so many years now and for so long she had idolised him. Now she can see his flaws and it saddens her.
*~*
Then the druid boy comes to Camelot. Morgana looks into his eyes and sees the answers to questions that she has long held and that Gaius has never been able to answer satisfactorily. She has magic. The boy dies and something inside her breaks. She does not know how to reconcile this with what she has known all her life. Uther believes that magic is evil and would have her killed if he ever finds out.
Two years later she attempts to kill Arthur.
She makes sure that Merlin isn't around. His magic is too powerful and recently he has been looking at her as though he can see beneath the calm surface that she projects. She does feel guilty about planning to kill Arthur mostly because of the pain that it will cause Merlin but also because she Arthur has become a person who will be able to rule effectively. But she is set in her course - Arthur must die.
Merlin knows that she has magic but he doesn't know that Morganna also knows this fact. Her nightly visions are now not so much nightly as every second of the day. She is not sure if she is completely sane. She sees the future or future possibilities. With every action by Merlin or Arthur new branches sweep into existence. She can and does see all of them. But no one else sees this; they all see the façade she is projecting and are completely taken in by it. Even Gwen her handmaiden of countless years doesn't see it.
She sees all. She sees the looks between Arthur and Merlin. She sees the unwilling servitude turn towards some kind of companionship and later still towards a soul deep loyalty. Merlin will do anything to save Arthur and in turn Arthur, Arthur who is to be King who should not hold anyone person above another, will do the same.
Arthur will remove the ban on magic, this she knows. Arthur is almost ready to be King but Morgana can’t wait that long. Her mind will not hold up that long. With every passing day possibilities for the future multiply and she sees them all.
But if she kills Arthur now, Uther will self-destruct and Camelot will fall. The dream of a united kingdom will fall with Arthur. She knows that Arthur is supposed to unite all the lands but he won’t be able to do that from a crypt.
So she plans and all the while going about her daily responsibilities. She plays the perfect ward with Uther and plays the perfect sibling with Arthur. She plays until the day comes. Merlin is visiting his mother and can do nothing to stop her.
Arthur's cup is poisoned. The mead is poured and Morgana proposes a toast. They clink glasses and drink. Morgana's outward smile is small though inside she feels like bursting. The plans are in motion now. Camelot will fall. Arthur will start choking and in exactly 47 seconds, he will breathe his last.
Something is wrong.
Arthur looks fine. He is not choking. A strangled gasp turns her attention to Uther. He is choking but she sees something in his eyes that says that he is not sorry to be dying. How did she not see this? The possibilities flood her mind once more. And she falls to her knees under the onslaught of thoughts. This is wrong. Arthur is supposed to be the one dying.
Uther looks at her but turns to Arthur almost immediately. He says nothing but a thousand words pass between them in Uther’s last seconds of life. Arthur tenderly cradles his fathers head in his lap, his back to her. He doesn't say anything. He closes his eyes and drops his head. She sees a single tear escape the corner of his eye.
She knows she has to leave now before the guards come. She gets out of her chair and walks to the exit.
She pauses.
Arthur doesn't attempt to stop her. He doesn't even look at her.
She leaves.
Three years later
She watches Merlin leave the Queen’s chambers. She sees him go over to Arthur. She sees the warring emotions on Merlin’s face. The Queen is dead but Arthur’s son lives. The King shudders but the simple touch of Merlin’s hand on his shoulder seems to restore his strength. He gently takes the child from Gaius’ arms and cradles his son in the crook of his arm.
Later that evening she sees Arthur lying on his bed gazing at the child in wonderment. Merlin sits across from him and gazes with fondness at both father and son. They are both happy but that happiness is tempered with a great deal of sadness as Gwen isn’t there.
The baby’s eyes flash gold and both Arthur and Merlin laugh from sheer relief.
Nimueh flinches and scrambles away from her scrying bowl.
Pairing: Merlin/Arthur
Rating: PG
Warnings: Character death
Spoilers: Vague spoilers for various episodes up to 1x08
Authors notes: Slightly AU on one point of 1x08. And thanks to gregisamazing for the very quick beta. Also this is the main story but there are lots of smaller stories that I want to add to this at some point.
Summary: History sometimes repeats itself and then sometimes it doesn't.
Uther looks at his sleeping boy and feels his stony facade crumble. Arthur is only a few hours old but is already motherless. How can he, King Uther Pendragon, raise this child alone? He won’t have the time to play in the mud with Arthur nor will he have hours to listen to Arthur’s childish exuberances. He has to be strong and brave for a Camelot that is currently in turmoil.
It was that witch, Nimueh, who caused his beloved wife to die in childbirth. He does not know how Arthur survived. He remembers the fear of a few hours ago when he saw Gaius pull his still son out of Igraines bleeding body. He was blue and still and Uther could not hear any cries. He does not know how Gaius saved his newborn son but he is beyond grateful.
He comes closer to Arthur’s cot and listens with amazement to his sons’ steady breaths. Arthur is alive and that is all that matters.
His mind turns now to magic. Magic is clearly an evil beyond all others and must be eradicated.
Twenty years later
A gangly youth wanders towards Camelot.
A broad-shouldered man trains with his knights.
A great dragon stirs in the caverns beneath the castle.
*~*
Suddenly the peace that had enveloped Camelot for the last few years shatters. Danger seems to lurk around every corner. The road forward, which had once looked so certain, splits into many paths.
Arthur nearly dies. He cheats death repeatedly-mostly due to Merlin’s efforts. Even then, Arthur is constantly in danger and Nimueh can see the despair in the bags under Uther’s eyes and the sagging of his shoulders from some invisible weight. But he never connects all these sudden threats to Arthur’s life with Arthur’s new manservant. She is almost disappointed. Uther was always so good at spotting magic.
Another attempt on Arthur’s life fails due to Merlin’s interference.
Nimueh looks up from her scrying basin and smiles. She is patient. She has all the time in the world. Camelot will fall; she is sure of it.
*~*
Six months after Merlin’s Arrival
Morgana sits at her window brushing her hair whilst she looks at them.
Merlin and Arthur, a servant and a prince, two people who are not equals and will never be. Yet Arthur treats Merlin as an equal. He teases Merlin, attempts to teach him how to fight and goes out on a life-threatening mission to save Merlin’s life. Those are not the actions of a master; those are the actions of a friend.
She’s sometimes a little jealous that a lot of Arthur’s attention is directed towards somebody else rather than towards her. But at the same time there’s also some relief as Arthur can be a little overwhelming at times. She smiles gently and looks down at them. They’ve just returned from a hunt. Arthur says something and instead of looking deferential Merlin laughs. Other people might mistake the look on Arthur’s face for anger but Morgana sees Arthur’s amusement and can see how hard he is trying not to smile.
It is utterly confusing but at the same time it’s quite charming. Morgana has always believed that Arthur was a prat - well, she still thinks he's a prat - but not so much of one anymore. He is showing that one day he can be a great King. He looks at the servants now as people and not merely objects who are there to obey his orders.
Her thoughts turn to Uther. He has been like a father to her for so many years now and for so long she had idolised him. Now she can see his flaws and it saddens her.
*~*
Then the druid boy comes to Camelot. Morgana looks into his eyes and sees the answers to questions that she has long held and that Gaius has never been able to answer satisfactorily. She has magic. The boy dies and something inside her breaks. She does not know how to reconcile this with what she has known all her life. Uther believes that magic is evil and would have her killed if he ever finds out.
Two years later she attempts to kill Arthur.
She makes sure that Merlin isn't around. His magic is too powerful and recently he has been looking at her as though he can see beneath the calm surface that she projects. She does feel guilty about planning to kill Arthur mostly because of the pain that it will cause Merlin but also because she Arthur has become a person who will be able to rule effectively. But she is set in her course - Arthur must die.
Merlin knows that she has magic but he doesn't know that Morganna also knows this fact. Her nightly visions are now not so much nightly as every second of the day. She is not sure if she is completely sane. She sees the future or future possibilities. With every action by Merlin or Arthur new branches sweep into existence. She can and does see all of them. But no one else sees this; they all see the façade she is projecting and are completely taken in by it. Even Gwen her handmaiden of countless years doesn't see it.
She sees all. She sees the looks between Arthur and Merlin. She sees the unwilling servitude turn towards some kind of companionship and later still towards a soul deep loyalty. Merlin will do anything to save Arthur and in turn Arthur, Arthur who is to be King who should not hold anyone person above another, will do the same.
Arthur will remove the ban on magic, this she knows. Arthur is almost ready to be King but Morgana can’t wait that long. Her mind will not hold up that long. With every passing day possibilities for the future multiply and she sees them all.
But if she kills Arthur now, Uther will self-destruct and Camelot will fall. The dream of a united kingdom will fall with Arthur. She knows that Arthur is supposed to unite all the lands but he won’t be able to do that from a crypt.
So she plans and all the while going about her daily responsibilities. She plays the perfect ward with Uther and plays the perfect sibling with Arthur. She plays until the day comes. Merlin is visiting his mother and can do nothing to stop her.
Arthur's cup is poisoned. The mead is poured and Morgana proposes a toast. They clink glasses and drink. Morgana's outward smile is small though inside she feels like bursting. The plans are in motion now. Camelot will fall. Arthur will start choking and in exactly 47 seconds, he will breathe his last.
Something is wrong.
Arthur looks fine. He is not choking. A strangled gasp turns her attention to Uther. He is choking but she sees something in his eyes that says that he is not sorry to be dying. How did she not see this? The possibilities flood her mind once more. And she falls to her knees under the onslaught of thoughts. This is wrong. Arthur is supposed to be the one dying.
Uther looks at her but turns to Arthur almost immediately. He says nothing but a thousand words pass between them in Uther’s last seconds of life. Arthur tenderly cradles his fathers head in his lap, his back to her. He doesn't say anything. He closes his eyes and drops his head. She sees a single tear escape the corner of his eye.
She knows she has to leave now before the guards come. She gets out of her chair and walks to the exit.
She pauses.
Arthur doesn't attempt to stop her. He doesn't even look at her.
She leaves.
Three years later
She watches Merlin leave the Queen’s chambers. She sees him go over to Arthur. She sees the warring emotions on Merlin’s face. The Queen is dead but Arthur’s son lives. The King shudders but the simple touch of Merlin’s hand on his shoulder seems to restore his strength. He gently takes the child from Gaius’ arms and cradles his son in the crook of his arm.
Later that evening she sees Arthur lying on his bed gazing at the child in wonderment. Merlin sits across from him and gazes with fondness at both father and son. They are both happy but that happiness is tempered with a great deal of sadness as Gwen isn’t there.
The baby’s eyes flash gold and both Arthur and Merlin laugh from sheer relief.
Nimueh flinches and scrambles away from her scrying bowl.