Homeless.
Okay so to explain...
I came home to find my room liek this...
My bed was VERTICAL with nothing on it.. My shelves were GONE, includign ALL the stuff on them.. (i had six shelves(with books, little momentoes from my grandfather and friends, picture frames, awards like altl eh normal stuff you put on shelves), and a drawer thing with like five drawers with stuff (stuff in the drawers like notes, personal things, journals, markers pens pencils, etc..)
My desk, which was filled with old school work, papers, paintins, and litle things... EMPTY
My bed shelves, with my FAVORITE books, personal things from good friends nad boyfriends, my harry potter books, my candles and candle holders, my vases for flowers... EMPTY
My walls, formerly covered in posters, some from the US open, josh hartnett things i collected, my whinnie the pooh poster from when i was born, my andy roddick posters, my cards from my birthdays that had like my favorite pretty cards hanging on my windows, meaninful cards from people, that i collect andkeep, post cards, artwork, GONE
Every last little thign I owned that ever meant anything to me.. My stuffed animals, which im sorry if you know me, I DONT PART WITH THEM. THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME. all given away,thrown away whatever. All that i had left was one bunny rabbit, which yes i lov ebunny, but seriousl you only cry to teddy. and ALL THE rest of my expensive wonderful animals, all gone. My american girl doll from when iw as little, beanie babies, little sand lizards and frogs my grandparents got me when they travleled to like Bermuda and stuff gone, my grandfathers wood carvings, my magazines, my MUSIC for my guitar and clarinet i've collected, my sketch pads, my MAKE UP my nail polish and moisterizers i left from college there, all my tickets and meaningful little thigns i kept from past relationships or friends or speical times, ALL GONE.
Not a thing was in my room, but in my berau, which included my CD cases for teh cds i brought to college with me, and Pictures taht had been in my room and about a handful of things i know i ahd left next to my bed. That's it, and that took up two drawers,and then two more drawers of old clothes taht i will never wear again. THATS IT thats all that remains of my friends, my relationships, my grandfather (esp. a note he wrote me that i always kept, GONE FUCKING THANKS DAD)
I mean everythign. Just everything. Things i still use, things that i want to keep forever, things that mean something, have value, important things, my diaries, my everything, everthing is just gone.
So I hope that explains a little bit about whath appened.
HE THREW IT ALL OUT oh wait, he donated mybooks, and apparently therestill might me time if i go back and seei fi can find any that were mine. Yeah okay. good luck with that.
He got rid of it all. ALL ALL OF MY STUFF.
I feel like he took away my life... my memories, my attachments, just everythign i ever saved or cared about is not left for me to try to remember in myhead. But yeah know, in psyc. seeign things triggers memeroies, i dont ahev that anymore. I dont ahve anything, i feel like i'ev lost so much of what was apart of me. These thigns held meaning. Somet hings were given to me, not even all that stuff thrown out was MINE. i mean kristianas books, ppls clothes i borrowed, gone. He took away so much by doing this. it feels exactly like i was robbed, but yeah know, i'd rather lose my stero, than a meaningful gift my grandfather gave me to remember him always by, or a painting my nana made esp. for me, or a letter from a friend or boyfriend that said so much inside, it was the words that were held by the letter, that made me keep the letter, to have thewords. I just
I'm speechless.