I STILL own you all, with a slight delay
Dear Santa...
Dear Santa,
This year I've been busy!
In June I bought porn for chocomachinegun (-10 points). Last Monday I stole gogglegasm_yo's purse (-30 points). In May I gave thereal_buchou a Dutch Oven (-10 points). Last week I ruled Iran as a kind and benevolent dictator (700 points). Last Thursday I pulled rita_report's hair (-5 points).
Overall, I've been nice (645 points). For Christmas I deserve a Lego set!
Sincerely,
j00-suck-god
And the reason I haven't been here for a long time is because I was stuck in a children's television show. I have since regained my tail, so all is (relatively) well. Mary, that was still a dirty trick and I hate you for it. Regardless, I am back and better than ever! My tail, having missed me greatly, feels a lot nicer now.