(no subject)
I was outside with Penn last night, he and I were talking. And he was hit with all these emotions, and he was covering his ears and saying he wasn't a murderer. Which I know I don't know the whole story, but I think its safe to say that even if I don't know all his secrets I know most of his soul, I know that no matter how many things he had to do to survive in his home world, he doesn't have the heart of a cold blooded killer. But I saw him covering his ears and I knew whatever this demon is that had Cristoff was she was going after Penn now. I can only imagine what it was like for Penn to have to feel all that, cause just what I was getting from my side was...he was hurting so bad. I think the worse part was when he was wishing for death so it would end. I recognized the feelings when he felt them, and all I could do was hope and pray I could get him inside and tranq'd so he could have some peace. When he was finally asleep they brought him downstairs and Eva put up the anti porting charms and helped me lock him up.
Somewhere in there Eva got mad. I'm not sure exactly why, though I could take some good guesses. But she was yelling for us all to come to the living room. It turned out to be a good thing, cause Yuffie had some answers for us, and there was a plan, and we get to kick this demon ass today. I gotta say though, even though I gave him a hard time with my inapproriately timed sense of humor, he really is taking to this whole almost being like Giles thing.
After the meeting broke, I ran home and got some of Penns weapons and my sword. Being in the apartment, in our room I think I sorta broke down again. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, the necklace that Penns mother had given him to protect him that he gave to me when he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and hoped it was a long one for for the first time. I couldn't help but think about how this thing had changed that, how it made him want to go now. I also thought about how the necklace had protected him for so long and then he took it off and this is what happened. I'm torn between putting it back on him til this is all over, but I don't want him waking up and in a delusional state thinking that I didn't want him because I thought he was a murderer. Instead I grabbed my mothers cross and brought it back with me, put it around his neck while he was sleeping. I'm not sure if it will protect him from this thing, but at this point I'd string him head to toe with rabbits feet and stuff if I thought it'd keep him safe. Then I pulled up a chair next to him and fell asleep for a little bit at least.
It's been a long night and its fixin to be an even longer day. It kind of strikes me funny that it's the Fourth, Independence Day. I'm having flashback to that movie, with the aliens. Yeah I'm a geek, this surprises you, I quote Star Wars for petes sake. Anyways, I was sitting here thinking about everything, and I realized what day it was and I was thinking of what the president said in the movie, I do love a good motivational speech part of a movie, and he quotes something I know I should know what it is, 'We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight'. Okay its kinda overdramatic. I mean we made it through an apocalypse, why wont we all make it through this?
I think I hear everyone starting to get this party started. Guess it's time to go storm the castle.
Somewhere in there Eva got mad. I'm not sure exactly why, though I could take some good guesses. But she was yelling for us all to come to the living room. It turned out to be a good thing, cause Yuffie had some answers for us, and there was a plan, and we get to kick this demon ass today. I gotta say though, even though I gave him a hard time with my inapproriately timed sense of humor, he really is taking to this whole almost being like Giles thing.
After the meeting broke, I ran home and got some of Penns weapons and my sword. Being in the apartment, in our room I think I sorta broke down again. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, the necklace that Penns mother had given him to protect him that he gave to me when he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and hoped it was a long one for for the first time. I couldn't help but think about how this thing had changed that, how it made him want to go now. I also thought about how the necklace had protected him for so long and then he took it off and this is what happened. I'm torn between putting it back on him til this is all over, but I don't want him waking up and in a delusional state thinking that I didn't want him because I thought he was a murderer. Instead I grabbed my mothers cross and brought it back with me, put it around his neck while he was sleeping. I'm not sure if it will protect him from this thing, but at this point I'd string him head to toe with rabbits feet and stuff if I thought it'd keep him safe. Then I pulled up a chair next to him and fell asleep for a little bit at least.
It's been a long night and its fixin to be an even longer day. It kind of strikes me funny that it's the Fourth, Independence Day. I'm having flashback to that movie, with the aliens. Yeah I'm a geek, this surprises you, I quote Star Wars for petes sake. Anyways, I was sitting here thinking about everything, and I realized what day it was and I was thinking of what the president said in the movie, I do love a good motivational speech part of a movie, and he quotes something I know I should know what it is, 'We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight'. Okay its kinda overdramatic. I mean we made it through an apocalypse, why wont we all make it through this?
I think I hear everyone starting to get this party started. Guess it's time to go storm the castle.