[RP with red_eyed_sin]
It was still hot, despite the fact the sun had set several hours ago. Isobel and Nathaniel had taken their research to a restaurant a few blocks away, to discuss it over dinner. Which had resulted in him trying to illustrate some complicated genetics sequence with items on the table. Isobel had pretended to not get what he meant, just to see him try to explain a mitochondrial matrix with the salt shaker and a salad fork.
"I just don't see how you think that sequence means anything," Isobel said as they walked, barely recognizing where they were going as she tried to think.
"That is because you are refusing to listen to what I'm saying," Dr. Essex said, and he sounded so horribly pompous that Isobel wanted to kick him in the shins. He started explaining something, and Isobel shifted her purse to the other side of her body, trying to envision what he was saying.
It all happened in a blur.
Two men passed them, heads down, and then Isobel felt hands pushing her towards an opening on her right. An alley. "Shut up, bitch," the man growled in her ear. His hand was on her breast, the other around her neck. "Scream and I'll put a bullet in your stomach."
Isobel went tense with fear. Savannah was a safe town, for the most part, but there was still crime. She nodded, eyes wide, and looked over to see the second man with a gun next to Dr. Essex's head.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me," Dr. Essex drawled. "Guns? Bloody hell, I used to the leave house and people sent entire teams after me. Now I get this? A gun? I am absolutely and utterly insulted."
"Shut up or I'll blow your fucking brains out," the second man said, looking back and forth wildly. "Hurry up, get the purse. Give me your wallet, you British pansy."
"It's not very crowded," the first man said, leering, drawing his fingers down Isobel's neck. She wanted to throw up. "Maybe I got something else I want to do, first. It won't take me but a second."
Isobel whimpered. Before she could do anything--offer her purse, kick him, scream--Dr. Essex moved, faster than Isobel had ever seen anyone move in her entire life. Considering she was dating Raven Darkholme, that was saying something. The gun that had been pressed to his head turned and fired, shooting his would-be mugger in the head. The man fell down, crumpling like a doll, bits of blood and brain spraying the ground.
Dr. Essex grabbed the man by the neck, the one who was pinning her against the wall. He lifted the man up off the ground, and his appearance altered to that of his normal red-eyed self. "Boy," he said coldly, as the man gasped and flailed in his grasp, "I have vanquished gods. You are barely worth the minimal effort it is going to take me to break your neck." He smiled as the man pleaded, promising to leave, swearing he wouldn't tell anyone what he saw. "It isn't very crowded," Dr. Essex said softly, mimicking the man's words, and laughed. "Maybe there is something else I want to do, first. I won't take me but a second." He tossed him down to the ground.
Isobel thought for a moment that Dr. Essex was letting the man go. But he never got up. His neck was twisted at an unnatural angle. Dr. Essex took a step towards her.
Isobel flattened herself against the wall. He stopped, holding his arm out politely. "It would be prudent of us to vacate the area," he said in his smooth voice.
"You just killed two men," Isobel pointed out. She was shaking, hard.
"Yes, well, they were going to grievously violate your person," he said, sounding confused. "What sort of gentleman do you take me for that I would allow that? Come along, let us leave these miscreants to the coroner. I doubt they shall be much missed."
"But SHIELD--you're not supposed to kill anyone," Isobel whispered, still unable to move. She looked down at the men. Dead. They were dead. They were not going to get back up.
She remembered the man's hand on her breast, his sticky breath on her neck. Her eyes narrowed. Isobel kicked her would-be rapist in the stomach. Four times.
"If I had known, I would have let you do that before I broke his neck." Dr. Essex sighed and put his hand on her waist. Isobel felt the world tilt and they were back, in the house.
Isobel went into the study, and sat down. She was cold.
A few moments later, Dr. Essex came into the room. He handed her a cup of tea without a word, and sat next to her. Closer than he would, normally, but not touching her. "Isobel."
She sipped the tea, grateful for the rush of warmth, and looked at him. Her hand, holding the teacup, was steady. So was her voice. "Yes?"
"You seem not yourself. Did that man harm you, in any way?"
"No." Isobel took another sip of the tea. She leaned back against the sofa. Staring straight ahead.
"Shall I divine this from your mind, or shall you tell me?"
"What are you, suddenly, a shrink?" Isobel turned and glared at him. She studied him for a second, looked at his impassive face. Blank red eyes. "Can you--I need--I need to see something. Could you look like you? I mean, the you before you were the you with the red eyes." She wanted to scream. She could feel anxiety, hysteria, threatening to boil up and burn her from within. "You and Raven, both, without the eyes. I just need--for one second, to see if it works."
She could tell he was confused, but his appearance altered to that of his disguised human self. Same dark hair, same neat beard. Skin still fair but not death-white. Eyes a deep, vibrant blue. With pupils. He looked concerned, a little, just as he had before he altered himself to look like a person. A normal, regular person. A human. With a face and eyes that showed emotions.
It didn't help. Isobel burst into tears. "No, no," she wailed, breathing too shallow and too fast. "Not helping, please--you, be you, I can't--"
He switched back at once, and put his hand on her shoulder. He had large hands, she'd noticed that before. Isobel wasn't used to large hands. Raven's were long-fingered, deadly. Elegant. His were long-fingered too, but broad. Scary. He had short nails, that looked like glass against his white skin.
She was relieved. Relieved he looked like him. "I'm so fucked up," she breathed, pushing the teacup at him. He waved it over to the table. "I can't stand it that you didn't look like you. The you without eyes."
"I have eyes," Dr. Essex said quietly. His hand was still on her shoulder, like a weight. "And they working quite well at the moment, little one. You are upset, I surmise, about the men I killed?"
Isobel laughed. It was a high, wild sound. "You'd think that, wouldn't you? You'd really think I would be. No, I'm--do you know what it is? I can't even say it, it's too awful--" she buried her head in her hands, shaking. Not crying. Just shaking, and feeling nauseous, wanting to throw up.
"Isobel, SHIELD is not going to remove you from service because I protected your person and your virtue. You had no control over my actions, and indeed, had you tried I would not have listened. That man was dead the moment he put his hands on you--"
"Stop!" Isobel shrieked, standing up. She looked at him, wide-eyed, breathing fast again. "Oh, God. You're not--you don't get it. I'm not upset that you killed them!"
He stood, gracefully, and clasped his hands behind his back. "Then why are you upset?"
"I--I'm glad." She looked at him, horrified.
He waited, obviously thinking more was forthcoming. When she didn't speak, he blinked. "Why is that making you upset?"
"You don't get it. I'm not you. I'm not a sociopath, I'm not evil. Do you know what I thought of, when you killed those men?"
"I cannot fathom," Dr. Essex drawled, walking over to the sideboard where the liquor was kept. He reached beneath and took out a bottle of some amber colored liquor, then poured it neatly into a glass. Isobel expected him to hand to her, but he drank it first in one toss, then poured another and handed it to her.
"I didn't want SHIELD to find out. I didn't want you to get fired. I don't want to have to start working with someone else who doesn't know our research, and isn't as smart as you are." She took the glass and took a sip, wincing at the taste, but drank it down. The liquor burned. It felt good. Better than the tea. "What does that mean?"
"We think things, in times of stressful situations, Isobel. When my son died, I recall worrying that I should have to miss a meeting I had promised to attend, and if my colleagues would be vexed at me for doing so. While this may somewhat fit Sinister's persona, this is long before I was a soulless monster." He patted her on the shoulder. "No one wants their world to be upended in the span of a few horrific seconds," he said calmly. "There is nothing wrong with worrying about mundane things to keep yourself from experiencing hysteria."
Isobel blinked at him. She didn't think he understood. I'm glad you killed them, and I don't even feel bad that they're dead, because I didn't want it to fuck up my life. It occurred to her then that he was not the person to explain this to. He would never understand how she could think otherwise. Neither would Raven. Even Anna killed people for her Cause. And Rachel...she didn't think Rachel would find anything wrong with it, either.
Sometimes, Isobel felt very worried that she was hanging around with the wrong people. "Your friends are an elevator," her mother used to say. "They can take you up, or they can take you down."
Today was one of those days Isobel thought she was on her way to the basement.
"I'm going to my apartment," Isobel said quietly. "I just need...to be alone." She turned, and walked to the door, then paused with her hand on the knob. "Aren't you going to tell me not to tell SHIELD? Not to put this in my report?"
Dr. Essex was quiet for a moment. "Is that necessary?"
Isobel didn't answer. She let herself out. They both knew the answer was no.
"I just don't see how you think that sequence means anything," Isobel said as they walked, barely recognizing where they were going as she tried to think.
"That is because you are refusing to listen to what I'm saying," Dr. Essex said, and he sounded so horribly pompous that Isobel wanted to kick him in the shins. He started explaining something, and Isobel shifted her purse to the other side of her body, trying to envision what he was saying.
It all happened in a blur.
Two men passed them, heads down, and then Isobel felt hands pushing her towards an opening on her right. An alley. "Shut up, bitch," the man growled in her ear. His hand was on her breast, the other around her neck. "Scream and I'll put a bullet in your stomach."
Isobel went tense with fear. Savannah was a safe town, for the most part, but there was still crime. She nodded, eyes wide, and looked over to see the second man with a gun next to Dr. Essex's head.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me," Dr. Essex drawled. "Guns? Bloody hell, I used to the leave house and people sent entire teams after me. Now I get this? A gun? I am absolutely and utterly insulted."
"Shut up or I'll blow your fucking brains out," the second man said, looking back and forth wildly. "Hurry up, get the purse. Give me your wallet, you British pansy."
"It's not very crowded," the first man said, leering, drawing his fingers down Isobel's neck. She wanted to throw up. "Maybe I got something else I want to do, first. It won't take me but a second."
Isobel whimpered. Before she could do anything--offer her purse, kick him, scream--Dr. Essex moved, faster than Isobel had ever seen anyone move in her entire life. Considering she was dating Raven Darkholme, that was saying something. The gun that had been pressed to his head turned and fired, shooting his would-be mugger in the head. The man fell down, crumpling like a doll, bits of blood and brain spraying the ground.
Dr. Essex grabbed the man by the neck, the one who was pinning her against the wall. He lifted the man up off the ground, and his appearance altered to that of his normal red-eyed self. "Boy," he said coldly, as the man gasped and flailed in his grasp, "I have vanquished gods. You are barely worth the minimal effort it is going to take me to break your neck." He smiled as the man pleaded, promising to leave, swearing he wouldn't tell anyone what he saw. "It isn't very crowded," Dr. Essex said softly, mimicking the man's words, and laughed. "Maybe there is something else I want to do, first. I won't take me but a second." He tossed him down to the ground.
Isobel thought for a moment that Dr. Essex was letting the man go. But he never got up. His neck was twisted at an unnatural angle. Dr. Essex took a step towards her.
Isobel flattened herself against the wall. He stopped, holding his arm out politely. "It would be prudent of us to vacate the area," he said in his smooth voice.
"You just killed two men," Isobel pointed out. She was shaking, hard.
"Yes, well, they were going to grievously violate your person," he said, sounding confused. "What sort of gentleman do you take me for that I would allow that? Come along, let us leave these miscreants to the coroner. I doubt they shall be much missed."
"But SHIELD--you're not supposed to kill anyone," Isobel whispered, still unable to move. She looked down at the men. Dead. They were dead. They were not going to get back up.
She remembered the man's hand on her breast, his sticky breath on her neck. Her eyes narrowed. Isobel kicked her would-be rapist in the stomach. Four times.
"If I had known, I would have let you do that before I broke his neck." Dr. Essex sighed and put his hand on her waist. Isobel felt the world tilt and they were back, in the house.
Isobel went into the study, and sat down. She was cold.
A few moments later, Dr. Essex came into the room. He handed her a cup of tea without a word, and sat next to her. Closer than he would, normally, but not touching her. "Isobel."
She sipped the tea, grateful for the rush of warmth, and looked at him. Her hand, holding the teacup, was steady. So was her voice. "Yes?"
"You seem not yourself. Did that man harm you, in any way?"
"No." Isobel took another sip of the tea. She leaned back against the sofa. Staring straight ahead.
"Shall I divine this from your mind, or shall you tell me?"
"What are you, suddenly, a shrink?" Isobel turned and glared at him. She studied him for a second, looked at his impassive face. Blank red eyes. "Can you--I need--I need to see something. Could you look like you? I mean, the you before you were the you with the red eyes." She wanted to scream. She could feel anxiety, hysteria, threatening to boil up and burn her from within. "You and Raven, both, without the eyes. I just need--for one second, to see if it works."
She could tell he was confused, but his appearance altered to that of his disguised human self. Same dark hair, same neat beard. Skin still fair but not death-white. Eyes a deep, vibrant blue. With pupils. He looked concerned, a little, just as he had before he altered himself to look like a person. A normal, regular person. A human. With a face and eyes that showed emotions.
It didn't help. Isobel burst into tears. "No, no," she wailed, breathing too shallow and too fast. "Not helping, please--you, be you, I can't--"
He switched back at once, and put his hand on her shoulder. He had large hands, she'd noticed that before. Isobel wasn't used to large hands. Raven's were long-fingered, deadly. Elegant. His were long-fingered too, but broad. Scary. He had short nails, that looked like glass against his white skin.
She was relieved. Relieved he looked like him. "I'm so fucked up," she breathed, pushing the teacup at him. He waved it over to the table. "I can't stand it that you didn't look like you. The you without eyes."
"I have eyes," Dr. Essex said quietly. His hand was still on her shoulder, like a weight. "And they working quite well at the moment, little one. You are upset, I surmise, about the men I killed?"
Isobel laughed. It was a high, wild sound. "You'd think that, wouldn't you? You'd really think I would be. No, I'm--do you know what it is? I can't even say it, it's too awful--" she buried her head in her hands, shaking. Not crying. Just shaking, and feeling nauseous, wanting to throw up.
"Isobel, SHIELD is not going to remove you from service because I protected your person and your virtue. You had no control over my actions, and indeed, had you tried I would not have listened. That man was dead the moment he put his hands on you--"
"Stop!" Isobel shrieked, standing up. She looked at him, wide-eyed, breathing fast again. "Oh, God. You're not--you don't get it. I'm not upset that you killed them!"
He stood, gracefully, and clasped his hands behind his back. "Then why are you upset?"
"I--I'm glad." She looked at him, horrified.
He waited, obviously thinking more was forthcoming. When she didn't speak, he blinked. "Why is that making you upset?"
"You don't get it. I'm not you. I'm not a sociopath, I'm not evil. Do you know what I thought of, when you killed those men?"
"I cannot fathom," Dr. Essex drawled, walking over to the sideboard where the liquor was kept. He reached beneath and took out a bottle of some amber colored liquor, then poured it neatly into a glass. Isobel expected him to hand to her, but he drank it first in one toss, then poured another and handed it to her.
"I didn't want SHIELD to find out. I didn't want you to get fired. I don't want to have to start working with someone else who doesn't know our research, and isn't as smart as you are." She took the glass and took a sip, wincing at the taste, but drank it down. The liquor burned. It felt good. Better than the tea. "What does that mean?"
"We think things, in times of stressful situations, Isobel. When my son died, I recall worrying that I should have to miss a meeting I had promised to attend, and if my colleagues would be vexed at me for doing so. While this may somewhat fit Sinister's persona, this is long before I was a soulless monster." He patted her on the shoulder. "No one wants their world to be upended in the span of a few horrific seconds," he said calmly. "There is nothing wrong with worrying about mundane things to keep yourself from experiencing hysteria."
Isobel blinked at him. She didn't think he understood. I'm glad you killed them, and I don't even feel bad that they're dead, because I didn't want it to fuck up my life. It occurred to her then that he was not the person to explain this to. He would never understand how she could think otherwise. Neither would Raven. Even Anna killed people for her Cause. And Rachel...she didn't think Rachel would find anything wrong with it, either.
Sometimes, Isobel felt very worried that she was hanging around with the wrong people. "Your friends are an elevator," her mother used to say. "They can take you up, or they can take you down."
Today was one of those days Isobel thought she was on her way to the basement.
"I'm going to my apartment," Isobel said quietly. "I just need...to be alone." She turned, and walked to the door, then paused with her hand on the knob. "Aren't you going to tell me not to tell SHIELD? Not to put this in my report?"
Dr. Essex was quiet for a moment. "Is that necessary?"
Isobel didn't answer. She let herself out. They both knew the answer was no.