5,000
Today was a glorious sunny goblin free day. Work was a totally different place without these evil meddling petty creatures. Had such a good day so figured it would be nice to go for a coffee and read the papers after work instead of slinking straight back to the Lair for a snooze in the garden
There was also another reason to celebrate. Got out the bottle of bubbles for a toast as the counter on the solar panel inverter ticked over from 4,999 to 5,000 kilowatt hours produced. Not too bad for a pissy little 1 kilowatt system for just over four years of work. Looking at the latest meter reading - used only 1,000 of those and sent the rest out to the grid. That was the whole point of getting photovoltaic panels rather than a more energy efficient solar hot water heater. Unused hot water gets wasted but unused electricity can be sold. And when the biggest ‘gas guzzler’ in the house is the fridge then there’s plenty of juice left over to sell.
But nothing is ever as simple as it seems. Nothing like having solar panels to make reading the electricity meter an entertaining and addictive activity. However this new interest soon led to the realization that the readings on the electricity bills were not the gospel truth they claimed to be. The best one ever was the 290 something off peak units we got paid for producing. Photovoltaic panels producing juice after 9pm even in the middle of summer is a bit of an achievement. There must have been a full moon for three months in a row.
But things are now getting interesting. Back in 2008 only weirdos and greenies had those strange bright shiny things on their roof. Since then assorted governments brought in various incentives and the price of the panels and assorted bits are now around one third of what they were back then. At the same time the price of electricity has been skyrocketing having been frozen at the same price for around 8 years.
It seems that the huge budget blowouts have led the electricity goblins to resort to all sorts of means to avoid paying people with panels or to get extra income where ever they can find it.
Cannot really decide after all this time if it was a good idea or not. Did pay more than the going rate now but got in before the hordes of dodgy dealers with substandard Chinese imports entered the market and also managed to get the 47cent net feed in tariff since August 2010. That rate got totally scrapped for new comers last year due to a massive budget blow out. Izzie still gets another 7 years at that rate but somehow suspects that will be the going price per unit around four years from now.
But it is a good idea investing in infrastructure in good times in order to reduce expenses for the lean times. Unless we rent out rooms again then there will be no electricity bills to pay for the foreseeable future. Assuming of course that the utility goblins play nice. And that it turns out is one very big assumption indeed.
The latest instalment of the drama started with a bill at the end of May 2011. The goblins had no problem with the bit of the meter concerned with electricity consumed and got their numbers accurate to the exact unit. But for some inexplicable reason, this accuracy did not extend to the units generated which they wrote as ‘estimated’ and credited with a big fat zero.
A bit strange but never mind as it will all get corrected in the next two monthly reading. Oh how innocent the Izzie was.
This time both sections of the meter reading were genuinely estimated as they happened to have turned up on one of the rare days that the gate is locked.
The miracle of goblin logic declared that once again the estimate for energy produced would be a big fat zero. But the same reasoning did not apply to the other side of the ledger. Instead of a big fat zero as it too was estimated, they came up with some ridiculous number in the region of 500 units thereby producing a bill of around $120
It was this double standard that made the serpent see red. Rang and complained about this ridiculous reading and their answer was that it was all our fault as the meter reader was unable to get access to the property. Offered to give them an accurate reading over the phone like used to be the case when their numbers were way out. Oh no. Could not do that. Company policy no longer allows readings over the phone etc etc. The best thing to do is just pay the bill and it will be sorted out next time. Izzie declared that she had no intention of paying $120 for electricity that she had not even used especially having not been credited the last four months for electricity produced.
So the only solution to the problem was for them to send out a meter reader at a cost of twenty dollars which would be added to the amended bill. Nice little earner that one. They get to stuff up and then make money out of their incompetence. The customer ‘service’ rep also recommended the option of being a self reader which involves the utility sending out a card and Izzie filling in the numbers and returning the completed card to goblin HQ
That worked fine the first time but it did not take long for the shit to hit the fan. Izzie remembers it like yesterday. Had a wonderful evening at the fringe festival and was feeling all relaxed and happy. That was until peeking in the mailbox. There was a love letter from these infernal electricity goblins
Being the height of summer and the peek of solar panel power production, should have been a big fat black number and the nice little line ‘No payment required as your account is in credit.’ But no - a red one with a due by date. We thought $120 was bad. This one had gone up to $150!
Looked through the thing with a fine tooth comb. Every single number matched our own record of the reading. Every single number but one - the number of units consumed at peak time. What should have been a big fat zero - they had turned into a ridiculous 891. And at nearly 43 cents a unit, that was a nice little earner indeed. If not for the fact of being finally credited for four months worth of units produced, the bill would have been a ridiculous $350 or so. The Izzie was simply murderous
This time no phone calls. Went to the office instead. We could just imagine some bimbo on the phone suggesting having the meter reader call out to do a special reading at the special discount mates rates of $20 payable in one easy instalment on the next bill
Of course they claimed that it must be our fault for filling in the number wrongly. Suggested that it was strange how every single number was correct except the one that it was in their interest to get very wrong indeed. Also had readings for the whole of January including the day of reading the meter.
The Izzie suspicion was that the reading was so low that it would be an extreme outlier and they would assume it was incorrect so went and made up their own numbers. Even with solar panels on the roof, consumption of less than 60 units in two months is incredibly low and to have not a single peak hour unit clocked up from mid November till the end of January would strike them as most suspicious indeed. We dread to think what will happen when they get the next one from 31st March. It took until Monday 2nd April to finally clock up one peak hour kilowatt and that is only because the peak usage times have changed from the middle of the day to early morning and late evening when the sun is not shining.
Got grilled on the size of the solar system, the air conditioning and number of plasma televisions etc etc. It was like the Spanish inquisition. They were almost laughing at our pissy little 1 kilowatt setup and how anyone in this day and age could claim not to have at least one multiplex sized television and air con. They never came straight out and said it but it was obvious they thought they thought I was lying
In the end they backed down and sent out a revised statement putting a big fat zero where that 891 had been but most importantly a credit of $200 instead of a bill for $150
But it seems that this is far from an isolated case. It seems to be a right little racket. As one newspaper columnist snarkily said - how can these buggers read your meter when they are sitting in call centres in Bombay? His story was titled "On the guess list, so might as well indulge” with wonderful tales of how he sets his aircon at subarctic temperatures. He doesn’t even have to get up from the couch to get a beer
Often the estimates are outrageously high and when folks complain they get told to get a special reading for a mere twenty dollars payable on the next bill.
Two weeks ago the latest meter card came in the Western Power envelope. A little note said that it must be returned by 10th April or your reading will be ESTIMATED. Like they would never ever do that under any other circumstances
Izzie figures they will have hissy fits when the unit total has now dropped to 52 for the two months and the peak unit reading is still stuck on 515 as it has been since Mid November
So this time took the extra precaution of not just writing down the readings but photocopying the actual card itself in case they decide to play more ‘blame the customer’ games and popped the infernal thing in the post last Monday
Was so not expecting to find the damned thing in our own mail box the very next day. It stated quite clearly that it was postage paid to some Western Power post box. The serpent address was on the back and it had appeared in the window of the envelope they sent it in. They obviously did that to prevent the thing being sent back to them
Resorted to crossing out the Lair location in assorted red lines and adding a big TO on the box office address on the reverse side. Now that should make it quite clear who is sending and who is receiving. So off it went on Wednesday
But once again the little critter had bounced back like a boomerang in the Izzie mail box. Oh bugger. Not like the bastards need an excuse to estimate the meter readings
In the end, had to go to their city central headquarters and just hand the blasted card over the counter. Managed to smile and ask nicely what to do with it as it keeps getting bounced back. They made some comment about the incompetence of Australia Post. Izzie was a good little serpent and stayed silent. No snarks about how it doesn’t really matter if it ever arrives as they will just pull a bunch of numbers out of their arses anyway or how this time we have a got a copy in case they cook the books etc etc
Slinked out of the infernal place and off for a coffee. But the damage had been done. The arrival of that infernal slip of paper had put such a dampener on the day. It was really silly to let it get to us especially as it was such a glorious gorgeous crisp and crunchy day and there was lots of squiggling and reading to be done and coffees to drink
Its arrival brought back all the frustrations of dealing with an insufferable bunch of bureaucratic goblins and the sense of utter injustice at how the rules are stacked so much in their favour. And then there is the anticipation of the inevitability and magnitude of the next big stuff up and the ritual of running around like a headless chook trying to get their ridiculous rulings reversed
At least there was no post on Good Friday so that was one less excuse to let the inner neurotic freak on the rampage and it turned out to be a wonderfully relaxed and goblin free day
There was also another reason to celebrate. Got out the bottle of bubbles for a toast as the counter on the solar panel inverter ticked over from 4,999 to 5,000 kilowatt hours produced. Not too bad for a pissy little 1 kilowatt system for just over four years of work. Looking at the latest meter reading - used only 1,000 of those and sent the rest out to the grid. That was the whole point of getting photovoltaic panels rather than a more energy efficient solar hot water heater. Unused hot water gets wasted but unused electricity can be sold. And when the biggest ‘gas guzzler’ in the house is the fridge then there’s plenty of juice left over to sell.
But nothing is ever as simple as it seems. Nothing like having solar panels to make reading the electricity meter an entertaining and addictive activity. However this new interest soon led to the realization that the readings on the electricity bills were not the gospel truth they claimed to be. The best one ever was the 290 something off peak units we got paid for producing. Photovoltaic panels producing juice after 9pm even in the middle of summer is a bit of an achievement. There must have been a full moon for three months in a row.
But things are now getting interesting. Back in 2008 only weirdos and greenies had those strange bright shiny things on their roof. Since then assorted governments brought in various incentives and the price of the panels and assorted bits are now around one third of what they were back then. At the same time the price of electricity has been skyrocketing having been frozen at the same price for around 8 years.
It seems that the huge budget blowouts have led the electricity goblins to resort to all sorts of means to avoid paying people with panels or to get extra income where ever they can find it.
Cannot really decide after all this time if it was a good idea or not. Did pay more than the going rate now but got in before the hordes of dodgy dealers with substandard Chinese imports entered the market and also managed to get the 47cent net feed in tariff since August 2010. That rate got totally scrapped for new comers last year due to a massive budget blow out. Izzie still gets another 7 years at that rate but somehow suspects that will be the going price per unit around four years from now.
But it is a good idea investing in infrastructure in good times in order to reduce expenses for the lean times. Unless we rent out rooms again then there will be no electricity bills to pay for the foreseeable future. Assuming of course that the utility goblins play nice. And that it turns out is one very big assumption indeed.
The latest instalment of the drama started with a bill at the end of May 2011. The goblins had no problem with the bit of the meter concerned with electricity consumed and got their numbers accurate to the exact unit. But for some inexplicable reason, this accuracy did not extend to the units generated which they wrote as ‘estimated’ and credited with a big fat zero.
A bit strange but never mind as it will all get corrected in the next two monthly reading. Oh how innocent the Izzie was.
This time both sections of the meter reading were genuinely estimated as they happened to have turned up on one of the rare days that the gate is locked.
The miracle of goblin logic declared that once again the estimate for energy produced would be a big fat zero. But the same reasoning did not apply to the other side of the ledger. Instead of a big fat zero as it too was estimated, they came up with some ridiculous number in the region of 500 units thereby producing a bill of around $120
It was this double standard that made the serpent see red. Rang and complained about this ridiculous reading and their answer was that it was all our fault as the meter reader was unable to get access to the property. Offered to give them an accurate reading over the phone like used to be the case when their numbers were way out. Oh no. Could not do that. Company policy no longer allows readings over the phone etc etc. The best thing to do is just pay the bill and it will be sorted out next time. Izzie declared that she had no intention of paying $120 for electricity that she had not even used especially having not been credited the last four months for electricity produced.
So the only solution to the problem was for them to send out a meter reader at a cost of twenty dollars which would be added to the amended bill. Nice little earner that one. They get to stuff up and then make money out of their incompetence. The customer ‘service’ rep also recommended the option of being a self reader which involves the utility sending out a card and Izzie filling in the numbers and returning the completed card to goblin HQ
That worked fine the first time but it did not take long for the shit to hit the fan. Izzie remembers it like yesterday. Had a wonderful evening at the fringe festival and was feeling all relaxed and happy. That was until peeking in the mailbox. There was a love letter from these infernal electricity goblins
Being the height of summer and the peek of solar panel power production, should have been a big fat black number and the nice little line ‘No payment required as your account is in credit.’ But no - a red one with a due by date. We thought $120 was bad. This one had gone up to $150!
Looked through the thing with a fine tooth comb. Every single number matched our own record of the reading. Every single number but one - the number of units consumed at peak time. What should have been a big fat zero - they had turned into a ridiculous 891. And at nearly 43 cents a unit, that was a nice little earner indeed. If not for the fact of being finally credited for four months worth of units produced, the bill would have been a ridiculous $350 or so. The Izzie was simply murderous
This time no phone calls. Went to the office instead. We could just imagine some bimbo on the phone suggesting having the meter reader call out to do a special reading at the special discount mates rates of $20 payable in one easy instalment on the next bill
Of course they claimed that it must be our fault for filling in the number wrongly. Suggested that it was strange how every single number was correct except the one that it was in their interest to get very wrong indeed. Also had readings for the whole of January including the day of reading the meter.
The Izzie suspicion was that the reading was so low that it would be an extreme outlier and they would assume it was incorrect so went and made up their own numbers. Even with solar panels on the roof, consumption of less than 60 units in two months is incredibly low and to have not a single peak hour unit clocked up from mid November till the end of January would strike them as most suspicious indeed. We dread to think what will happen when they get the next one from 31st March. It took until Monday 2nd April to finally clock up one peak hour kilowatt and that is only because the peak usage times have changed from the middle of the day to early morning and late evening when the sun is not shining.
Got grilled on the size of the solar system, the air conditioning and number of plasma televisions etc etc. It was like the Spanish inquisition. They were almost laughing at our pissy little 1 kilowatt setup and how anyone in this day and age could claim not to have at least one multiplex sized television and air con. They never came straight out and said it but it was obvious they thought they thought I was lying
In the end they backed down and sent out a revised statement putting a big fat zero where that 891 had been but most importantly a credit of $200 instead of a bill for $150
But it seems that this is far from an isolated case. It seems to be a right little racket. As one newspaper columnist snarkily said - how can these buggers read your meter when they are sitting in call centres in Bombay? His story was titled "On the guess list, so might as well indulge” with wonderful tales of how he sets his aircon at subarctic temperatures. He doesn’t even have to get up from the couch to get a beer
Often the estimates are outrageously high and when folks complain they get told to get a special reading for a mere twenty dollars payable on the next bill.
Two weeks ago the latest meter card came in the Western Power envelope. A little note said that it must be returned by 10th April or your reading will be ESTIMATED. Like they would never ever do that under any other circumstances
Izzie figures they will have hissy fits when the unit total has now dropped to 52 for the two months and the peak unit reading is still stuck on 515 as it has been since Mid November
So this time took the extra precaution of not just writing down the readings but photocopying the actual card itself in case they decide to play more ‘blame the customer’ games and popped the infernal thing in the post last Monday
Was so not expecting to find the damned thing in our own mail box the very next day. It stated quite clearly that it was postage paid to some Western Power post box. The serpent address was on the back and it had appeared in the window of the envelope they sent it in. They obviously did that to prevent the thing being sent back to them
Resorted to crossing out the Lair location in assorted red lines and adding a big TO on the box office address on the reverse side. Now that should make it quite clear who is sending and who is receiving. So off it went on Wednesday
But once again the little critter had bounced back like a boomerang in the Izzie mail box. Oh bugger. Not like the bastards need an excuse to estimate the meter readings
In the end, had to go to their city central headquarters and just hand the blasted card over the counter. Managed to smile and ask nicely what to do with it as it keeps getting bounced back. They made some comment about the incompetence of Australia Post. Izzie was a good little serpent and stayed silent. No snarks about how it doesn’t really matter if it ever arrives as they will just pull a bunch of numbers out of their arses anyway or how this time we have a got a copy in case they cook the books etc etc
Slinked out of the infernal place and off for a coffee. But the damage had been done. The arrival of that infernal slip of paper had put such a dampener on the day. It was really silly to let it get to us especially as it was such a glorious gorgeous crisp and crunchy day and there was lots of squiggling and reading to be done and coffees to drink
Its arrival brought back all the frustrations of dealing with an insufferable bunch of bureaucratic goblins and the sense of utter injustice at how the rules are stacked so much in their favour. And then there is the anticipation of the inevitability and magnitude of the next big stuff up and the ritual of running around like a headless chook trying to get their ridiculous rulings reversed
At least there was no post on Good Friday so that was one less excuse to let the inner neurotic freak on the rampage and it turned out to be a wonderfully relaxed and goblin free day