The Daily Snitch

Jun 08, 2011 21:18

For the first time in three years the first week back to work after the serpent holidays has gone very well indeed
No Cheshire Rats telling us all 'to grow extra pairs of arms' when informed of being short staffed or evil stinking goblins letting us work the whole week short

But the best bit of the week was just before knock off time. Had finished all the duties for the day and went to read the memo book for a bit of entertainment and amusement.

Such a tasty morsel the serpent could not have imagined in her wildest dreams
The subject title was "Social Networking Policy"

First reaction - why did they take so long? For a bunch of image conscious litigacious bean counters it was most negligent indeed
Second reaction - we wants our own personal copy of this delicious and delightful morsel

So was ever so delighted to read on further to find that this matter is regarded with such urgency and importance that it will be raised at not just the next staff meeting but the one after that and everyone will get a copy with their next pay slip - which of course will be a day late due to the excuse of a public holiday over east in spite of the fact that we are located in the wildest west of Oz.

While this policy was mainly concerned with social networking - specifically Vicebook and Twitter - they did go on to mention blogging in general and an obsession with cyber bullying
It was all about protecting the reputation of the organization and protecting the interests of stake holders - making the very ridiculous assumption that their reputation is even worth protecting. Such wishful thinking
It was all about their image and its enhancement and threats of termination of employment. Nowhere was any consideration given to the veracity of the vindictive posts online

A bunch of us were having a giggle over this latest tasty morsel. The serpent sneered about the stupid losers on Vicebook one of whom was present in the room. She got all huffy and indignant to which the Izzie proclaimed that anyone dumb enough to post about work on a site using their real name deserves whatever they get. This particular princess had already gotten rapped over the knuckles for mentioning names and places but it was a bit rich coming from a boss bitch who posted photos of people at work without ever requesting permission. But that's one of the perks of being a boss well at least until this new policy came along

Izzie is so so looking forward to having a personal copy of this memo to peruse at leisure and wonders if we should request a copy in pdf form at the next staff meeting to save the bother of having to type some of the tastiest tidbits instead of being able to just cut and paste

Can't imagine what they'd think of a creature who not only blogs about goblins but has squiggled a whole 50,000 word nanowrimo novel taking the piss out of the bastards

Was hoping to find the policy online - no luck yet at the Oracle of Google but did find another one just as juicy
The Horrid Hufflepuff Bank says "Snitch and Spy or you're fired"

Most amused indeed to see a bunch of German websites are sharing the joy. As we say in Oz "Which bank? They're all bastards"

Of course - this serpent is so secretive that no one at Salazars' Sanatorium has any idea of her alternative Cyberian identity

But just one question to all geeks out there - needing to know if we need to tweek a bit - can a website that has been linked to find the sources of links if they are locked, protected or private entries?
This time last year the serpent attended the traveling kitchen cabinet starring Kevin 747. Who could have ever known that only two weeks later he would be knifed in the back and replaced by the Red Queen.
As well as gossiping about them, the goblins also got a mention under lock and key of course with linkies to the Buzzword bingo at the "Megatherion Money Management" website
So assuming these new rules are retrospective - we needs to know if linkies can be traced

cyberia, snitch, gossip, goblins, salazars sanatorium

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