Kouga's Complaint

Aug 07, 2007 23:47

Title: Kouga's Complaint
Genre: Satire
Rating: K
Pairings: Kouga/Ayame,

Life ain't fair, the wolf prince would complain.
"First the harpies tried to drive me insane,
killing my pack and then I meet her-
but she's stuck with that mangy cur,
and nothing I can do could set her free,
And then Naraku tries to devour me
All for those stupid shards.

"Life ain't fair, I tell ya," he likes to moan --
It's not like he doesn't have a woman of his own -
A feisty red-head tribal leader and pups to boot
She sure doesn't like the stories they shoot
Across the internet, so every body knows
What scheme them fan girls have with their little shows.
Some days, he thinks Ayame's going' to kill him.

"Life ain't fair," he tells me, crying on the phone
When he sees the latest story, with a loud angry groan.
"Yaoi!" he gripes. "Rapist and stalker and goon,
This is what they make me, howling at the moon.
Sesshoumaru gets to kill me sometime, or even that mangy mutt,
Although sometimes I get to be a good guy, kicking Youkai butt.
But I'm tired of it all" he tells me before hanging up.

"Well get a lawyer," I tell him, tired of his whine,
Whimpering about how bad it is, his endless line.
"Sue 'em.  Let the lawyers make some noise and shout--
Nobody else will pay attention since RT wrote your character out.
Enjoy your retirement.  Move to Idaho --
Wolves are doing well there, don't ya know.
You might catch an elk."

non-challenge

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