Crap vs Crack part II; The Worst Fan Fiction Ever! ... No, really.
In my previous Crap vs. Crack post I talked about the Prince of Tennis Live Action Movie, which I have stated is crack, not crap. And now, for this second installment, I would like to discuss the Wost Fan Fiction Ever (meaning it's total crap), which can be found HERE, and it's counterpart a hand drawn half-assed web comic by the same title (My Immortal) which can be found HERE.
The fan fiction, My Immortal, is riddled with poor grammar, unintelligible chat speak, and a plot so thin the air at the tip of Mount Everest would be jealous. The chapters are ridiculously short, the flow is non-existent, and the author notes all insist that she is "Goffik" even though she listens to Evanescence, Good Charlotte, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, and Panic! At the Disco, shops at Hot Topic, and believes wearing all black, and having more than two piercings (one in each ear) makes you a Goth. She hates- rather blatantly, I might add- on anyone who points out her stories short comings, even if they do so nicely and offer suggestions on ways to improve, or anybody who asks if she hadn't meant the story to be a satire of bad Mary-Sue fics. The fic is so bad, it has it's own page on the encyclopedia dramatica, I'm not making this shit up! Google it, I swear it's true.
For a while (the first time I came across it way back in 2006), I was certain that the writer had simply categorized it wrong, placing it under Romance/Angst, when it should be under Parody, sadly... I was wrong. So very, very wrong. The person in question (xxxbloodyrists666xxx) seemed at first to be making fun of another writer on FF.Net by the name of bloodytearz666, but upon closer inspection, that isn't the case. The two seem to admire one another's work. Actually, as far as I know, they might even be the same person- I mean, I have two AFF accounts; one for crack, and one for more serious stuff- (On the bright side, she seems to have stopped updating... so no more poor innocents who stumble upon it will suffer from bleeding eyeballs).
Now, where the actual fanfic is utter crap (though I still say if it was under another category- read; PARODY-it would be amazingly cracktackular), the comic is pure crack.
It points out little things, like the uber emo-ness, and funny little quirks (like wearing high heels to bed) that make the story so bad (and, no, I don't mean bad in the outdated slang sort of way), while sticking to the original plot. The art is half-assed, as if you were looking at a series of doodles from someones sketchbook, but it's supposed to be that way in order to keep the crappy feel of the fanfic. It's actually pretty funny, if you're into cracktacular parodies.
Actually, the comic is the reason I'm writing this... go read it, comment, giggle, flame, do whatever it is you feel like doing. I merely wanted to share it with you.
Why, xxxbloodyrists666xxx, why couldn't have let me keep believing it was a brilliant work of satire!? Why?
Yeah, I know, don't make fun of the dyslexic people- it isn't cool. But, as I'm a diagnosed dyslexic too, and I have spent hours upon hours in special classes and with numerous tutors, and development specialists I think it gives me the right to at least say... the story isn't well thought out at all, even if there weren't so many errors in spelling and grammar.
Yes, I am dyslexic, it takes me longer than the average person to read something over, and I have to be really careful when I'm writing/typing something up. Over the years I've developed certain tricks to help me, like writing things down on a sheet of paper working from right to left instead of left to right, and then copying it out again going from left to right. Don't laugh; it works. I've trained myself so that I can catch most of my mistakes, and I have become best friends with the spell check function.
Just to be clear; I am not making fun of her disability, as I suffer the same one. I can ignore the spelling and grammar (if I must); it's the OOCness, the choppiness of the incredibly short chapters, and the lack of respect toward anyone who doesn't share her tastes in music and dress that I find crappy. Not to mention the shameless self-insertion, and blatant Mary-Sue-ism in a fic that is not of the comedy/parody persuasion. I mean, the creator of Devil's Panties is dyslexic too, and you don't see me hating on her stuff. Why? Because her stuff is actually good.
Ugh... that's enough from me for now...
~Jam
The fan fiction, My Immortal, is riddled with poor grammar, unintelligible chat speak, and a plot so thin the air at the tip of Mount Everest would be jealous. The chapters are ridiculously short, the flow is non-existent, and the author notes all insist that she is "Goffik" even though she listens to Evanescence, Good Charlotte, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, and Panic! At the Disco, shops at Hot Topic, and believes wearing all black, and having more than two piercings (one in each ear) makes you a Goth. She hates- rather blatantly, I might add- on anyone who points out her stories short comings, even if they do so nicely and offer suggestions on ways to improve, or anybody who asks if she hadn't meant the story to be a satire of bad Mary-Sue fics. The fic is so bad, it has it's own page on the encyclopedia dramatica, I'm not making this shit up! Google it, I swear it's true.
For a while (the first time I came across it way back in 2006), I was certain that the writer had simply categorized it wrong, placing it under Romance/Angst, when it should be under Parody, sadly... I was wrong. So very, very wrong. The person in question (xxxbloodyrists666xxx) seemed at first to be making fun of another writer on FF.Net by the name of bloodytearz666, but upon closer inspection, that isn't the case. The two seem to admire one another's work. Actually, as far as I know, they might even be the same person- I mean, I have two AFF accounts; one for crack, and one for more serious stuff- (On the bright side, she seems to have stopped updating... so no more poor innocents who stumble upon it will suffer from bleeding eyeballs).
Now, where the actual fanfic is utter crap (though I still say if it was under another category- read; PARODY-it would be amazingly cracktackular), the comic is pure crack.
It points out little things, like the uber emo-ness, and funny little quirks (like wearing high heels to bed) that make the story so bad (and, no, I don't mean bad in the outdated slang sort of way), while sticking to the original plot. The art is half-assed, as if you were looking at a series of doodles from someones sketchbook, but it's supposed to be that way in order to keep the crappy feel of the fanfic. It's actually pretty funny, if you're into cracktacular parodies.
Actually, the comic is the reason I'm writing this... go read it, comment, giggle, flame, do whatever it is you feel like doing. I merely wanted to share it with you.
Why, xxxbloodyrists666xxx, why couldn't have let me keep believing it was a brilliant work of satire!? Why?
Yeah, I know, don't make fun of the dyslexic people- it isn't cool. But, as I'm a diagnosed dyslexic too, and I have spent hours upon hours in special classes and with numerous tutors, and development specialists I think it gives me the right to at least say... the story isn't well thought out at all, even if there weren't so many errors in spelling and grammar.
Yes, I am dyslexic, it takes me longer than the average person to read something over, and I have to be really careful when I'm writing/typing something up. Over the years I've developed certain tricks to help me, like writing things down on a sheet of paper working from right to left instead of left to right, and then copying it out again going from left to right. Don't laugh; it works. I've trained myself so that I can catch most of my mistakes, and I have become best friends with the spell check function.
Just to be clear; I am not making fun of her disability, as I suffer the same one. I can ignore the spelling and grammar (if I must); it's the OOCness, the choppiness of the incredibly short chapters, and the lack of respect toward anyone who doesn't share her tastes in music and dress that I find crappy. Not to mention the shameless self-insertion, and blatant Mary-Sue-ism in a fic that is not of the comedy/parody persuasion. I mean, the creator of Devil's Panties is dyslexic too, and you don't see me hating on her stuff. Why? Because her stuff is actually good.
Ugh... that's enough from me for now...
~Jam