whoa, pain.
For as good as he made me feel, last night my pain was equal.
He always said that to me, "For as good as i make you feel, eventually your pain will be equal." I never thought that hard about it but now I know what he meant by it. Atleast he was honest, I respect that. Eh, whatever... I mean I really like him but I guess it wasn't meant to be... I guess we'll just be friends, that's cool. I mean she was there before me and she is going to be there after me as well so whatevv. Live and let live.
I guess it's cool, atleast it happened in the begining and not a couple of months into the "relationship". Well... I guess it's time to be alone and face the facts. I think right now I am supposed to be alone, actually. I need to put a lot of pieces of my puzzle together. Last night I realized something... Dirty had just dropped me off at home and I didn't want to go inside so I just left my bags on the side of the porch and sat on the little bench outside of my house and looked to the sky... For the first time in a very long while I fealt comfortable alone. I mean, I wish he would've stayed and hung out because he is such an awesome person but... I did feel comfortable alone though.
But I am looking for a friend... Just someone who likes to be alone and not go out to much... Someone who will sit with me and hold my hand and just makeout while the sun goes down. Someone who likes to take pictures and go thrifting and just be silly... And someone who loves music... Someone who will just sit with me and listen to music all night... I would really enjoy that. But a person like that is hard to find.... And when you have found that person there is always something blocking him or her from you... I just wish I could tear that wall down and find what I am looking for...
Untill I find that person I am just going to reflect... Just think about everything... Start writing again and taking photos... I think life will be just a little normal untill I can get over all of the things that have happened in the past week or two. It's hard though, I wish I had an easy button...
>rewind back to three weeks ago before everything went to shit<
I really wish I could do that.
♥
Little Alex
He always said that to me, "For as good as i make you feel, eventually your pain will be equal." I never thought that hard about it but now I know what he meant by it. Atleast he was honest, I respect that. Eh, whatever... I mean I really like him but I guess it wasn't meant to be... I guess we'll just be friends, that's cool. I mean she was there before me and she is going to be there after me as well so whatevv. Live and let live.
I guess it's cool, atleast it happened in the begining and not a couple of months into the "relationship". Well... I guess it's time to be alone and face the facts. I think right now I am supposed to be alone, actually. I need to put a lot of pieces of my puzzle together. Last night I realized something... Dirty had just dropped me off at home and I didn't want to go inside so I just left my bags on the side of the porch and sat on the little bench outside of my house and looked to the sky... For the first time in a very long while I fealt comfortable alone. I mean, I wish he would've stayed and hung out because he is such an awesome person but... I did feel comfortable alone though.
But I am looking for a friend... Just someone who likes to be alone and not go out to much... Someone who will sit with me and hold my hand and just makeout while the sun goes down. Someone who likes to take pictures and go thrifting and just be silly... And someone who loves music... Someone who will just sit with me and listen to music all night... I would really enjoy that. But a person like that is hard to find.... And when you have found that person there is always something blocking him or her from you... I just wish I could tear that wall down and find what I am looking for...
Untill I find that person I am just going to reflect... Just think about everything... Start writing again and taking photos... I think life will be just a little normal untill I can get over all of the things that have happened in the past week or two. It's hard though, I wish I had an easy button...
>rewind back to three weeks ago before everything went to shit<
I really wish I could do that.
♥
Little Alex