'And just to lay with you, there's nothing that I wouldn't do - save lay my rifle down.'
I know I haven't posted in a while, I've been doing a feverish amount of writing lately and there's normally a negative correlation between the two.
School got out on the 20th, so I'm a sophomore now, haha. Freshman year went by way too fast. As for summer plans, I'm free the entire month of June, when I'm planning to do a huge amount of writing, reading, photography, and whatever strikes my fancy. The month of July, my family and I are going to visit relatives in China, which will be the first time I've ever been to another country. Normally I'd find that exciting, but it involves me facing two of my biggest fears - flying on airplanes, and open/far away/public places. The first flight to San Fran will take about 2 hours, with a 5-hour layover; then the second flight to Beijing will take about 16 hours.
Yes, I will be spending 16 fucking hours on a fucking airplane. I love my life.
And I highly suspect I might be agoraphobic. Even if I just go out into my yard, it feels wrong somehow. I feel like I shouldn't be out, I should be in, and I don't know what to do. Going to school on Mondays and Tuesdays results in me having panic attacks first period, and may or may not have something to do with my general suckage in Geometry. I think it's this and not something else because it's always Mondays and Tuesdays that are hell, hardly ever the rest of the week, because later on I'd get used to being at school.
And you know, this really f-ing sucks because I was totally planning to travel the country and run away to Europe once I was old enough. I love travel. My brain loves it and my heart loves it, but my body just says, NO NO NO. So if I start hyperventilating and wanting to throw up at the supermarket, how the hell am I gonna manage in a whole 'nother country?
Hey, Pushing Daisies is on!! I've always wanted to see that show!