'Well, if I remain passive and you just want to cuddle, then we should be OK.'
1) A few people on Mibba are starting to friend me just because they like my stories. I don't suppose there should be anything wrong with that, I just feel like I'm being ever so slightly objectified. I mean, maybe I'm too old-fashioned or something, but I still believe a friend is someone you actually know well, who's there for you, and who you can talk to anytime about anything, and keep talking to. I think the Internet is starting to sort of downgrade the definition of 'friend'. I mean, I hate to be like one of those people who puts on this big show of being rebellious and delights in nothing more than they do in pointing out every little thing wrong with society as loudly as they can. But still. I find myself saying things like, 'Do you mean friend on Facebook, or friend friend?' And it depresses me. The Internet can connect people from any two places in the world where Internet access is available, but what are sites like Myspace (or LJ) really - a place for 'friends', or a place for friends?
That was a rhetorical question (mostly). I know if anyone answers, it will probably be 'both'. I can't remember who, but someone said the more you tried to be witty, the farther you got from the truth. Which brings me to -
2) I've thought about it and decided that, in the unspeakable event that I would need to choose, I would choose my real-life friends over Internet friends. Please don't think I'm a traitor. But my real-life friends...I could tell you my first impressions of them, based on their appearance, and everything...I could tell you where I first really began to notice them...the kind of light there was...I know how their laughs sound...I've seen their faces change like the weather. Honestly, though, there are a fair number of things I'd never tell them and only confide in Internet friends for. Many people I've met on the Internet understand me better than anyone I've ever known, and I aime them tres tres bien pour ca. So it evens out.
3) Continuing with the heaviness, I'm afraid - I have no idea what my backup is gonna be. As you probably already know, I extremely want to be a writer when I'm all grown up and less awkward, but everyone knows writers get paid total shit, so now I've got to decide my backup. And I might be screwed, since every backup that would work also happens to pay total shit. Real nice. I realize this makes me seem like, obsessive over money, but it was one of those moments when you realize that money does matter, and a hell of a lot more than your free-thinking, idealistic young mind would like it to. This epiphany is inevitably soon followed by the one where you realize that a) there really is a 'system'; and b) that trying to beat the system would be almost guaranteed suicide. There's life for you.
4) Ione Locher <-- (Eye-OH-nee LO-ker) That name is perfection.
5) Yesterday on the bus, me and Jingjing were talking about England, and she was saying, "The only good thing about England is - " and then I interrupted and said, "The only good thing? The only thing wrong with England is that they tried to colonize too many places. I mean, throughout history, they've always had a good government and stuff, and there were hardly ever any real revolutions - " and then she interrupted and said, "But they're just really pompous and uptight about themselves, like, 'I'm British, so I'm better'" - and then I interrupted and said, "But they - well actually more like all of Europe - thinks we're the uptight ones, since our drinking age is so high and we can't show this on TV, and we can't say this on TV, and Europe just thinks America is a bunch of fat, ignorant, greedy prudes."
At this point, the lady sitting next to us joined the conversation, and she started talking about cultural misconceptions, and after Jingjing got off, she told me about an ESL class she taught once and how one of her students thought all these things about Americans, and she was surprised at what he said, because Americans happened to think the same about his country. And then we went on to how close language and culture were connected, at this point she told me she 'wouldn't be boring me anymore'. At this, I laughed. I realized too late that I should have told her she wasn't boring me at all, but the moment had passed and then I felt sad that it had.
I should just think less, I think.
Oh yes, and also at one point she told me she thought me and Jingjing would 'go far'. I felt flattered by this, and she went on to say how rare it was to find teenagers that thought like us these days, and I believe I agreed with her.
Cool stuff happens on the bus sometimes.
6) Lunch was an hour and ten minutes long today because there was a carnival. It was lame, all it was was a bunch of inflatable thingies and some food stands and that was it. Me and Kevin and Jacob weren't sure what to do at first, so then I decided to go to the counselors' office and turn in my schedule for next year, since I 'might as well', hahaha. After that, we decided to hang out in Dr. Tobin's room, but the guys went to get sweet stuff so I followed them. And I had cotton candy for the first time today, and it was so weird, because it just, like, vaporizes. And after that, me and Kevin used the paper sticks to play unicorn wars. Oh, and Chris was in there too, and he kept trying to take pictures/videos of me, and it was annoying, so I kept hinting at, well...hahaha...because he'd pretty much begged me not to tell anyone. Oh, and Dr. Tobin keeps fish in these aquariums, and there was a clownfish and a sea anemone! And all the fish and things had names! So basically, the whole thing was all-around coolness.