(no subject)
Okay.
So almost a year has passed.
Let's recap how right people are about how stagnant my life is.
I've looked through the last 6 or 7 entries.
A lot of my problems remain the same.
Self-respect, insecurity, repeating the same mistakes, etc. etc.
Rather than drinking myself into a stupor every weekend, and smoking occasionally.
I've picked up the smoking heavily, and kept the drinking to the less often, but usually very heavy, drinking sessions.
Since my trip to Nova Scotia, I decided to accept my transfer to Concordia University, in Montreal.
I spent my summer working at Sobey's.
Had my fun with the Scarborough kiddies.
And moved to Montreal in August.
It was the first completely selfish decision, I had ever made.
I walked away from the safe comforts of Scarborough; the same comforts that I grew to find so nauseating and consuming.
Most importantly, I walked away from my mother.
I don't think I've forgiven myself yet.
But I feel that as much as I love her to death and wish a completely different reality for her, and for myself, I had to do it.
I couldn't take another year at home.
I really just couldn't.
I was so unhappy.
So unbearably unhappy.
And so I moved.
I went into res; Jesuit residence, to be exact.
I did Frosh.
Met some wonderful people.
Being in the same city as Kenroy was weird.
I guess I should save that for a whole other day though.
Christian, too.
He can get his post too.
Moral of the story is.
Year one of Montreal is winding down.
I'm simultaneously relieved, and saddened, to be leaving.
Relieved, because I've been extremely irritable lately, and almost everyone in res is getting on my nerves.
Saddened, because I know I'll miss this when I'm gone.
People have been annoying me and acting like this is high school all over again.
I left it behind for a reason.
Starting shit.
Hating people cause they're friends with other people.
Cliques.
Gossip.
Judgements.
I could do without it.
School is okay though.
I'm finally in a program I like.
The Human Environment.
Think Environtmental Science, minus the mandatory Biology classes, etc.
I got a new place for next year.
I'm living with Yasmin, Erika, and Amy.
It's a good thing.
I'm kinda tired of writing now, so I think I'll stop.
So almost a year has passed.
Let's recap how right people are about how stagnant my life is.
I've looked through the last 6 or 7 entries.
A lot of my problems remain the same.
Self-respect, insecurity, repeating the same mistakes, etc. etc.
Rather than drinking myself into a stupor every weekend, and smoking occasionally.
I've picked up the smoking heavily, and kept the drinking to the less often, but usually very heavy, drinking sessions.
Since my trip to Nova Scotia, I decided to accept my transfer to Concordia University, in Montreal.
I spent my summer working at Sobey's.
Had my fun with the Scarborough kiddies.
And moved to Montreal in August.
It was the first completely selfish decision, I had ever made.
I walked away from the safe comforts of Scarborough; the same comforts that I grew to find so nauseating and consuming.
Most importantly, I walked away from my mother.
I don't think I've forgiven myself yet.
But I feel that as much as I love her to death and wish a completely different reality for her, and for myself, I had to do it.
I couldn't take another year at home.
I really just couldn't.
I was so unhappy.
So unbearably unhappy.
And so I moved.
I went into res; Jesuit residence, to be exact.
I did Frosh.
Met some wonderful people.
Being in the same city as Kenroy was weird.
I guess I should save that for a whole other day though.
Christian, too.
He can get his post too.
Moral of the story is.
Year one of Montreal is winding down.
I'm simultaneously relieved, and saddened, to be leaving.
Relieved, because I've been extremely irritable lately, and almost everyone in res is getting on my nerves.
Saddened, because I know I'll miss this when I'm gone.
People have been annoying me and acting like this is high school all over again.
I left it behind for a reason.
Starting shit.
Hating people cause they're friends with other people.
Cliques.
Gossip.
Judgements.
I could do without it.
School is okay though.
I'm finally in a program I like.
The Human Environment.
Think Environtmental Science, minus the mandatory Biology classes, etc.
I got a new place for next year.
I'm living with Yasmin, Erika, and Amy.
It's a good thing.
I'm kinda tired of writing now, so I think I'll stop.