(no subject)
this post is a little delayed because ive already known for a day but i feel like i need to at least say something to acknowledge whats happened ... though now that im here i dont even know where to start. i guess ill just say that while ive dealt with a lot of death in my life, this is the first time its been a friend and the first time ive really felt the loss deeply ... maybe because hes my age, maybe because we were all so close that year, but whatever the reason, i really cant sum into words everything ive been feeling the past 24 hours. i definitely lost it at work this morning and started bawling in the bathroom but since then its just been a lot of numbness. what are you supposed to think/feel when something like this happens?
anyway, im flying home tomorrow night and will be there til monday morning; i still havent found out what day the service will be but im pretty sure itll happen while im there, which is after all the reason im going. im really not looking forward to it, though, especially having to see all the people i havent talked to in so long ... i wish this wasnt the reason we'll all be reuniting. i wish, more than anything, that this hadnt happened.
anyway, im flying home tomorrow night and will be there til monday morning; i still havent found out what day the service will be but im pretty sure itll happen while im there, which is after all the reason im going. im really not looking forward to it, though, especially having to see all the people i havent talked to in so long ... i wish this wasnt the reason we'll all be reuniting. i wish, more than anything, that this hadnt happened.