"...circles and squares surround us, we need to hide..."
I realize I probably don't have much reason for it, but I'm feeling more and more like it's me versus everyone else. Of course I have my friends but they tend to turn into enemies after a while so I almost don't even want to bother. I sometimes really do think everything would be easier if I just stopped talking to everyone. Like really, everyone. It would probably save some time, as it appears I can't hold friendships together worth shit. I've spent pretty much every Friday and Saturday for the last couple months at home by myself and I enjoyed it. I almost want to change schools next year just so I can be anonymous, at least for a little while. Things are pretty much sucking, maybe a change of environment and people is what I need. It's really just time for me to suck it up and admit to myself that I'm exceptionally unhappy and there needs to be some drastic changes here pretty soon because I'm kind of losing it a little bit.
The fact that I'm seriously considering going to Amy Beihl or Highland or something next year is a little surprising even to me, but not having to see anyone I know every day could really be what I need. That's probably why I'm looking forward to New Jersey so much this year, because I can just relax for a couple weeks and not give a shit what's going on in Albuquerque. Maybe I'll move.
Bitch bitch bitch whine whine whine, don't take me seriously.
I like sleeping. I like dreaming and knowing it. Things tend to fall apart for me when I'm awake. I can't do anything right. I can't take care of anything, I can't take care of myself. I'm a failure at pretty much everything I've ever tried.
Well I guess that's emo enough for now. I'll probably forget about it again for the next couple weeks and then explode again soon. Good times.
The fact that I'm seriously considering going to Amy Beihl or Highland or something next year is a little surprising even to me, but not having to see anyone I know every day could really be what I need. That's probably why I'm looking forward to New Jersey so much this year, because I can just relax for a couple weeks and not give a shit what's going on in Albuquerque. Maybe I'll move.
Bitch bitch bitch whine whine whine, don't take me seriously.
I like sleeping. I like dreaming and knowing it. Things tend to fall apart for me when I'm awake. I can't do anything right. I can't take care of anything, I can't take care of myself. I'm a failure at pretty much everything I've ever tried.
Well I guess that's emo enough for now. I'll probably forget about it again for the next couple weeks and then explode again soon. Good times.