(no subject)
so i haven't journaled in ages. i'm just doing it now because i am so effing pissed about a lot of shit, and it's too personal to go off about it on facebook.
first of all, i went to the gyno today because i've been having the worst pain everrrrr when i have sex. it was a yeast infection. ANOTHER yeast infection! ahhhhhhhhhh. i have had SOOOOO many yeast infections in the past year and a half, it's not even funny...... i even went to the doctor here in boone to get tested for one like, not even a month ago- and i was treated... it either didn't go away or i got another! ah. i think it just didn't go away. so they put me on some cream for 7 days and gave me some diflucan pills-- but idk what to do with those b/c that's what they gave me up here and obviously it doesn't work.. and i thought it was preventative-- i don't know.
secondly, i just went back, and obviously, i know i've gotten fat- (i weigh the most i ever have, 130 lbs quite literally)... and last time i was at the gyno was in april, for a yeast infection, and i changed my bc then. she said i was 118 then! ten pounds! ahhhhhh. the bc i started taking then is to blame. there's no other excuse. my diet hasn't changed. if anything, i eat healthier. yes, i eat a lot, but i've always eaten a lot. i didn't work out most of the summer... camp was a serious 3-week-long workout that never stopped- and after it, i wanted to recooperate. so i practically started bootcamping when i got back to app. at first, i was going to the gymto run on tu, th, and fri- bc i had aerobics on monday and wednesday. but the number on the scale kept going up, so i started going monday and wednesday too- 4 extra workouts a week...... and i was still gaining! i finally said, you know what? it's my fucking birth control pill. ten pounds don't sneak on when your working your butt off at the gym!
so, i switched back to my old bc (i just hope i don't get incessant yeast infections...) and i hope that i can get the weight off. i was at my lowest weights of all time while on yaz, so i should be okay. like, back when zak and i split in 08 i got down to like, freakin 110 lbs. not that i ever wanna be a 2 by 4 again, just-- i'd like to lost 10 lbs. five lbs would make me happy! i jus wanna be back to 120. back in hs, 120 was fat to me. i wonder what i would be like NOT on hormonal bc....... prolly 115. isn't life weird? no babies, but i'm fat anyway.
i'm gonna try to keep up w my progress in here.
OH also! i'm sick all the time. over the summer i got a sore throat that about killed me that lasted a week, then i got a terrible, incessant cough that lingered for 2 weeks (while working at camp)... so i was sick probably a month of the summer. i was just getting over the cold i got right before fall break that had me bedridden practically my whole break when i got another cold! i was still coughing occasionally, and then one day i start coughing all the time again... then the body aches and stuffy nose and general all over shitty feeling......ughhhhhh what is wrong w/ my immune system?! i bought new toothbrushes. once i'm feeling better, i'm gonna start using my new one, and lysol everything. that should save me.
gah!
badtimes for w.
first of all, i went to the gyno today because i've been having the worst pain everrrrr when i have sex. it was a yeast infection. ANOTHER yeast infection! ahhhhhhhhhh. i have had SOOOOO many yeast infections in the past year and a half, it's not even funny...... i even went to the doctor here in boone to get tested for one like, not even a month ago- and i was treated... it either didn't go away or i got another! ah. i think it just didn't go away. so they put me on some cream for 7 days and gave me some diflucan pills-- but idk what to do with those b/c that's what they gave me up here and obviously it doesn't work.. and i thought it was preventative-- i don't know.
secondly, i just went back, and obviously, i know i've gotten fat- (i weigh the most i ever have, 130 lbs quite literally)... and last time i was at the gyno was in april, for a yeast infection, and i changed my bc then. she said i was 118 then! ten pounds! ahhhhhh. the bc i started taking then is to blame. there's no other excuse. my diet hasn't changed. if anything, i eat healthier. yes, i eat a lot, but i've always eaten a lot. i didn't work out most of the summer... camp was a serious 3-week-long workout that never stopped- and after it, i wanted to recooperate. so i practically started bootcamping when i got back to app. at first, i was going to the gymto run on tu, th, and fri- bc i had aerobics on monday and wednesday. but the number on the scale kept going up, so i started going monday and wednesday too- 4 extra workouts a week...... and i was still gaining! i finally said, you know what? it's my fucking birth control pill. ten pounds don't sneak on when your working your butt off at the gym!
so, i switched back to my old bc (i just hope i don't get incessant yeast infections...) and i hope that i can get the weight off. i was at my lowest weights of all time while on yaz, so i should be okay. like, back when zak and i split in 08 i got down to like, freakin 110 lbs. not that i ever wanna be a 2 by 4 again, just-- i'd like to lost 10 lbs. five lbs would make me happy! i jus wanna be back to 120. back in hs, 120 was fat to me. i wonder what i would be like NOT on hormonal bc....... prolly 115. isn't life weird? no babies, but i'm fat anyway.
i'm gonna try to keep up w my progress in here.
OH also! i'm sick all the time. over the summer i got a sore throat that about killed me that lasted a week, then i got a terrible, incessant cough that lingered for 2 weeks (while working at camp)... so i was sick probably a month of the summer. i was just getting over the cold i got right before fall break that had me bedridden practically my whole break when i got another cold! i was still coughing occasionally, and then one day i start coughing all the time again... then the body aches and stuffy nose and general all over shitty feeling......ughhhhhh what is wrong w/ my immune system?! i bought new toothbrushes. once i'm feeling better, i'm gonna start using my new one, and lysol everything. that should save me.
gah!
badtimes for w.