(no subject)
the past few days have been pretty much blah.
been working in the spare room, taking off the wallpaper and such so dave can soon move in. should be exciting when we have to move his bed.
i've been starting to write a jazzy song thats pretty exciting, yet soothing. if i choose to use it for anything, i'll probably submit it to jake to see if we can make it a "rosa marie" song.
man, i hate our name. it just makes us sound like a bunch of pussies. i guess we are,lol but lets try to overlook that. i mean, it shouldn't matter to me, it should be about the music. and i spose it is. i really enjoy the music that rosa marie has to offer. at the same time: i can't stand them sometimes. when i look at the band, it seems like a piece of god knows what.
there are certian people in the band that i feel are definatly expendable. we don't need a bad keyboard player or backupsingers that make us look stupid. i love the music, but i feel if we don't start to improve, i may have to talk to jake about him reconsidering the line-up, or i will leave. jakes music is beautiful, and the new stuff amazes me even more than his origional stuff... but i don't think it diserves to be treated the way that our band treats it.
in all honesty, i guess, it seems jake is just trying to be the next conor oburst(bright eyes).
i've been thinking about it alot, and i realized that i should start depending on my own music creativity instead of jake's. he has more potential than i do for sure, and its not like i'm going to compete with him if i leave the band, but i don't want my future to be hanging on jake's every musical decision.
getting to the point, i guess i'll just come out and say it. jake and i had a talk a long time ago and he said that in the future(out of highschool), he's going to do his best to make it in the music business. and when he does, he's taking me along for the ride. i'm very gracious of the offer, and jake is seriously THE BEST musician i know. not just freakin guitar play, his knolege, his poetic writing ability, and freakin personality just throw it into a fuckin blender! but as i was saying, i know jake is gonna be big someday. but i doubt i will be there with him.
i love playing bass. its up there on my top three and i would love to get paid for it, but i just don't think its something i would want to do for the rest of my life. i thought it was. but when we went to that feild trip in akron, it seriously changed my perspective on the my life's future. i've always wanted to go out and achieve something more, and get away from everything i've known. i know i can go to college at a.u. and still be in the band, but there is an equal part that wants to get away from everything here and go to a place like philidelphia, or even chicago.
i think my biggest fear is that i won't ever find myself if i don't leave.
i'm still not sure what i want to do with my life. with both my interests(music, media), there is a large rist in both. you just have to go to college first to take the risk with media. although i've given alot of thought into being a producer. (see, i can throw music and media together)
well, i was somewhat optimistic when i started writing this, but now that i've thrown all that feeling out, its just hovering over my head.
i've been giving it alot of thought as to if i should or not, and i think new years eve is going to help me "wash out" all my stress.
*matt+emily+doug+anyone else=hang out before break is over (bowling or something?)
been working in the spare room, taking off the wallpaper and such so dave can soon move in. should be exciting when we have to move his bed.
i've been starting to write a jazzy song thats pretty exciting, yet soothing. if i choose to use it for anything, i'll probably submit it to jake to see if we can make it a "rosa marie" song.
man, i hate our name. it just makes us sound like a bunch of pussies. i guess we are,lol but lets try to overlook that. i mean, it shouldn't matter to me, it should be about the music. and i spose it is. i really enjoy the music that rosa marie has to offer. at the same time: i can't stand them sometimes. when i look at the band, it seems like a piece of god knows what.
there are certian people in the band that i feel are definatly expendable. we don't need a bad keyboard player or backupsingers that make us look stupid. i love the music, but i feel if we don't start to improve, i may have to talk to jake about him reconsidering the line-up, or i will leave. jakes music is beautiful, and the new stuff amazes me even more than his origional stuff... but i don't think it diserves to be treated the way that our band treats it.
in all honesty, i guess, it seems jake is just trying to be the next conor oburst(bright eyes).
i've been thinking about it alot, and i realized that i should start depending on my own music creativity instead of jake's. he has more potential than i do for sure, and its not like i'm going to compete with him if i leave the band, but i don't want my future to be hanging on jake's every musical decision.
getting to the point, i guess i'll just come out and say it. jake and i had a talk a long time ago and he said that in the future(out of highschool), he's going to do his best to make it in the music business. and when he does, he's taking me along for the ride. i'm very gracious of the offer, and jake is seriously THE BEST musician i know. not just freakin guitar play, his knolege, his poetic writing ability, and freakin personality just throw it into a fuckin blender! but as i was saying, i know jake is gonna be big someday. but i doubt i will be there with him.
i love playing bass. its up there on my top three and i would love to get paid for it, but i just don't think its something i would want to do for the rest of my life. i thought it was. but when we went to that feild trip in akron, it seriously changed my perspective on the my life's future. i've always wanted to go out and achieve something more, and get away from everything i've known. i know i can go to college at a.u. and still be in the band, but there is an equal part that wants to get away from everything here and go to a place like philidelphia, or even chicago.
i think my biggest fear is that i won't ever find myself if i don't leave.
i'm still not sure what i want to do with my life. with both my interests(music, media), there is a large rist in both. you just have to go to college first to take the risk with media. although i've given alot of thought into being a producer. (see, i can throw music and media together)
well, i was somewhat optimistic when i started writing this, but now that i've thrown all that feeling out, its just hovering over my head.
i've been giving it alot of thought as to if i should or not, and i think new years eve is going to help me "wash out" all my stress.
*matt+emily+doug+anyone else=hang out before break is over (bowling or something?)