(no subject)
i am so full of love and no one to spit it out at.
i feel really distant from everyone right now. it's not so bad, but i really wish i could tell someone how much i love them. not someone in particular, i just want everyone to know how much they mean to me, even when i'm cold and distant.
i really want to babysit, i just want to squeeze and love and make someone else laugh. that would be really fulfilling.
the other day i mentioned that i want to be a bartender. david said he saw me more as a diner waitress. i thought about the old hags up at the belock and was horribly offended. he told me that he meant i was beautiful and tough like a diner waitress, he could see me pouring coffee with a cigarette in my mouth. i felt much better.
i wish someone thought that other than david.
i started reading again. it feels really good, i feel very philisophical. tortured by the unbearable lightness of being. i want to quote this book every other sentence.
kathy was telling me about how some people are born with faith and some aren't, and it's a gift and something people should really be thankful for. i wish i was born with faith. i really wish i had a religion. that probably sounds weird to most of you but i would love to humble myself to something that i truely believe in. too bad i don't have faith in anything, and the people i put faith into always let me down.
i feel really distant from everyone right now. it's not so bad, but i really wish i could tell someone how much i love them. not someone in particular, i just want everyone to know how much they mean to me, even when i'm cold and distant.
i really want to babysit, i just want to squeeze and love and make someone else laugh. that would be really fulfilling.
the other day i mentioned that i want to be a bartender. david said he saw me more as a diner waitress. i thought about the old hags up at the belock and was horribly offended. he told me that he meant i was beautiful and tough like a diner waitress, he could see me pouring coffee with a cigarette in my mouth. i felt much better.
i wish someone thought that other than david.
i started reading again. it feels really good, i feel very philisophical. tortured by the unbearable lightness of being. i want to quote this book every other sentence.
kathy was telling me about how some people are born with faith and some aren't, and it's a gift and something people should really be thankful for. i wish i was born with faith. i really wish i had a religion. that probably sounds weird to most of you but i would love to humble myself to something that i truely believe in. too bad i don't have faith in anything, and the people i put faith into always let me down.