Eyes
I think the depth perception thing is getting worse. Nothing has been where I've expected it to be for awhile now. Adding to the problem is the fact that my long brittle nails are all breaking, meaning things are now closer to my finger tips than I'm expecting because I keep thinking there's a bunch of nail there. This is all very disconcerting. I am due for a check-up, but, you know, YOU pay for it, because I can't.
My boyfriend's trying to get me to let him teach me how to drive. I said not until he turns 21, like it says you have to be on the back of the permit. I'm not breaking the law, folks. I did do a little bit of driving with him though (SHH DON'T CALL THE COPS) but until April, no driving for me. Which is fine, because my horrible eyes will get me up a tree one of these days (I can see it now: "IT WAS LIKE A MILE AWAY I SWEAR IT JUST JUMPED OUT" I mean, do you even know how many mail boxes I've almost hit? Like a million, that's how many. And I haven't even driven outside of the mile between my grandma's house and my houses since February. In conclusion I am a terrible driver and I don't want to ever drive ever.)
Also, I think my body doesn't know how to burp, because I keep getting those weird chest pains you get when you drink a lot of carbonation. They're really, really awful and I'd like to drink some soda without having it come back to haunt me in the form of godawful gas pains. I mean, come on, how much more of an old lady do I have to get? I already drink caffeine-free soda. Now I can't drink any at all? WTF.
Oh oh oh also, I reeeeeeally need to get new shampoo and conditioner. I've almost run out of my usual stuff so I've been using back-ups, and my hair is really hating me for it. I mean, it's gotten so dry I think I could strip paint with it. It still looks as absolutely gorgeous and shiny, shiny, shiny as ever, of course, because my hair is vain, but it feels like I'm running my fingers through a paint brush. Only the use of leave-in conditioner (of the same brand as my regular conditioner) has kept it from curling up into a tangled, sentient mass on top of my head and attempting to either run away or bite my fingers. I'm just glad I've been able to detangle it at all, it's been dreadlocking something awful since I started running low on my usual stuff. And I don't even want to talk about the greasiness I've been getting from not using my usual shampoo. Awful stuff. Herbal Essences, you own my soul. How did I ever use Suave before?? I guess this is what my mother always meant when I was a wee short-haired lass: "You want long hair? Have fun taking care of it."
She didn't mention that it's only fun to take care of when it isn't trying to strangle you in your sleep because you haven't offered the proper shampoo and conditioner sacrifice. Seriously, I used the hair dryer for a bit today and I think I heard it snarl. It does need a trim though (SHHHH)
-4:37 AM
My boyfriend's trying to get me to let him teach me how to drive. I said not until he turns 21, like it says you have to be on the back of the permit. I'm not breaking the law, folks. I did do a little bit of driving with him though (SHH DON'T CALL THE COPS) but until April, no driving for me. Which is fine, because my horrible eyes will get me up a tree one of these days (I can see it now: "IT WAS LIKE A MILE AWAY I SWEAR IT JUST JUMPED OUT" I mean, do you even know how many mail boxes I've almost hit? Like a million, that's how many. And I haven't even driven outside of the mile between my grandma's house and my houses since February. In conclusion I am a terrible driver and I don't want to ever drive ever.)
Also, I think my body doesn't know how to burp, because I keep getting those weird chest pains you get when you drink a lot of carbonation. They're really, really awful and I'd like to drink some soda without having it come back to haunt me in the form of godawful gas pains. I mean, come on, how much more of an old lady do I have to get? I already drink caffeine-free soda. Now I can't drink any at all? WTF.
Oh oh oh also, I reeeeeeally need to get new shampoo and conditioner. I've almost run out of my usual stuff so I've been using back-ups, and my hair is really hating me for it. I mean, it's gotten so dry I think I could strip paint with it. It still looks as absolutely gorgeous and shiny, shiny, shiny as ever, of course, because my hair is vain, but it feels like I'm running my fingers through a paint brush. Only the use of leave-in conditioner (of the same brand as my regular conditioner) has kept it from curling up into a tangled, sentient mass on top of my head and attempting to either run away or bite my fingers. I'm just glad I've been able to detangle it at all, it's been dreadlocking something awful since I started running low on my usual stuff. And I don't even want to talk about the greasiness I've been getting from not using my usual shampoo. Awful stuff. Herbal Essences, you own my soul. How did I ever use Suave before?? I guess this is what my mother always meant when I was a wee short-haired lass: "You want long hair? Have fun taking care of it."
She didn't mention that it's only fun to take care of when it isn't trying to strangle you in your sleep because you haven't offered the proper shampoo and conditioner sacrifice. Seriously, I used the hair dryer for a bit today and I think I heard it snarl. It does need a trim though (SHHHH)
-4:37 AM