:: Picking up the pieces ::
All i can say to open up this journal is Thank You
thank you ALL so much for your support and being there for me, this really touched my heart and it would have been more difficult if i was completely alone, I really didn't know all of you cared that much. and again i thank you so.
From Sunday till Thursday, is was non stop chaos one thing after another. After the police came with the ambulance on Sunday, the funereal home came by to take the body to Forensics to preform an Autopsy. we had to wait 2 hours till we were allowed to go and get interview by Forensics. in the mean time, Rougee and her family came over, and so did my brother's teacher. My brother got to see my mom leaving on the sling, like he didn't completely understand, So his teacher stayed with my brother at my house while my father and I went to forensics. we stayed there practically the whole afternoon and then we had to identify the body by photo. It was so hard to see it.... After words, i got more company in the evening. Illution with madisson and Vero and Paola, Dennis with his boyfriend and Yamibliss with Yaniel. We where watching in my room Zeitgeist 1 & 2 then we went to get some food, also the phone was ringing off the hook.
people i didn't even expect to hear form called. it was a very draining first day.
the days that followed was going back to forensics and find out what she died form, it was a heart attack, but we won't know the why yet. It look to be accidental, she con confused with he pills, thinking she was taking 2 different things and whined up drinking more of the same by mistake. She really couldn't see that well and all of her body was hurting all the time, she also suffered form chest pain a lot. Tuesday was the wake, in the morning my father and i had to go to Social security and fill out some paper work to inform she was desisted and a point me as my brother's tutor, form 6:30am to 2pm they kept us there and the wake began at 1pm, so we had to call the funeral home to display my mother at the room reserved for her. then when we got there, i just broke down, seeing the display......i saw my Grandmother and my Aunt a few other family members and some of my father's co-wokers there as well. then the ceremony and my bother arrived with his teacher and he just like in shock to see my mother in the casket, after ceremony, My father had to take him home for a bit, cuz he didn't want to be in the room anymore.
So i stayed receiving people, then to my surprise, basically my whole art staff form work came, including my boss, Karys. I broke down, and i was so overwhelmed to see that hey also really cared, im still a newbie to them, ya know? they game me two envelopes and they saw there floral arrangement that they sent over as well. It gave me such peace of mind to see them there too. then they left and more people came, later, I saw Rougee with her family as well and other neighbors. My father came back with my brother and he would just walk around out on the waiting room cuz he couldn't stand to be in the room and see my mother in the coffin. the last ones to come was Yamibliss and Illution and then we all went home afterwords, i was exhausted and yet i had problems sleeping, i had slept, i had like some kinda fear eeriness . the next day was the burial and just very few people came and it very simple ceremony. we all said out goodbyes and form there we had a meeting at my brother school to discuss what will happen to him, his teacher found a service with the social workers and it a house keeper to be in charge of Oliver(my brother) while my father and i are at work. She starts on Monday, Thank goodness. and well, i just had ALOT of mixed feelings and confusions. We still have much to do, find all the load papers my mother had and take that to bank and such.
I returned to work after the burial, cuz i didn't want to be alone in the house and i just wanted to distract myself. During all of this, my father has been moving back in to house Today we where picking up the last of his things and still there's more to organize.
I dunno what to expect in the future but i know that my mind isn't fully clear and i'm just trying to cope with what i can. I still have a lot to do , finish work on, so forth and i truthfully apologize for ALL the delays and everything. i gonna try yo get myself to draw again which i must and maintain my head distracted as much as i can.
Again Thank you ALL for being there form me, in spirit and in person ya'll dunno how much this means to me. *hug*
thank you ALL so much for your support and being there for me, this really touched my heart and it would have been more difficult if i was completely alone, I really didn't know all of you cared that much. and again i thank you so.
From Sunday till Thursday, is was non stop chaos one thing after another. After the police came with the ambulance on Sunday, the funereal home came by to take the body to Forensics to preform an Autopsy. we had to wait 2 hours till we were allowed to go and get interview by Forensics. in the mean time, Rougee and her family came over, and so did my brother's teacher. My brother got to see my mom leaving on the sling, like he didn't completely understand, So his teacher stayed with my brother at my house while my father and I went to forensics. we stayed there practically the whole afternoon and then we had to identify the body by photo. It was so hard to see it.... After words, i got more company in the evening. Illution with madisson and Vero and Paola, Dennis with his boyfriend and Yamibliss with Yaniel. We where watching in my room Zeitgeist 1 & 2 then we went to get some food, also the phone was ringing off the hook.
people i didn't even expect to hear form called. it was a very draining first day.
the days that followed was going back to forensics and find out what she died form, it was a heart attack, but we won't know the why yet. It look to be accidental, she con confused with he pills, thinking she was taking 2 different things and whined up drinking more of the same by mistake. She really couldn't see that well and all of her body was hurting all the time, she also suffered form chest pain a lot. Tuesday was the wake, in the morning my father and i had to go to Social security and fill out some paper work to inform she was desisted and a point me as my brother's tutor, form 6:30am to 2pm they kept us there and the wake began at 1pm, so we had to call the funeral home to display my mother at the room reserved for her. then when we got there, i just broke down, seeing the display......i saw my Grandmother and my Aunt a few other family members and some of my father's co-wokers there as well. then the ceremony and my bother arrived with his teacher and he just like in shock to see my mother in the casket, after ceremony, My father had to take him home for a bit, cuz he didn't want to be in the room anymore.
So i stayed receiving people, then to my surprise, basically my whole art staff form work came, including my boss, Karys. I broke down, and i was so overwhelmed to see that hey also really cared, im still a newbie to them, ya know? they game me two envelopes and they saw there floral arrangement that they sent over as well. It gave me such peace of mind to see them there too. then they left and more people came, later, I saw Rougee with her family as well and other neighbors. My father came back with my brother and he would just walk around out on the waiting room cuz he couldn't stand to be in the room and see my mother in the coffin. the last ones to come was Yamibliss and Illution and then we all went home afterwords, i was exhausted and yet i had problems sleeping, i had slept, i had like some kinda fear eeriness . the next day was the burial and just very few people came and it very simple ceremony. we all said out goodbyes and form there we had a meeting at my brother school to discuss what will happen to him, his teacher found a service with the social workers and it a house keeper to be in charge of Oliver(my brother) while my father and i are at work. She starts on Monday, Thank goodness. and well, i just had ALOT of mixed feelings and confusions. We still have much to do, find all the load papers my mother had and take that to bank and such.
I returned to work after the burial, cuz i didn't want to be alone in the house and i just wanted to distract myself. During all of this, my father has been moving back in to house Today we where picking up the last of his things and still there's more to organize.
I dunno what to expect in the future but i know that my mind isn't fully clear and i'm just trying to cope with what i can. I still have a lot to do , finish work on, so forth and i truthfully apologize for ALL the delays and everything. i gonna try yo get myself to draw again which i must and maintain my head distracted as much as i can.
Again Thank you ALL for being there form me, in spirit and in person ya'll dunno how much this means to me. *hug*