You be like hello nasty, where you been?
toothpastefordinner.com
today i let go of a grudge held much too long. and it felt really damn good. i feel like i wasted the past couple of years needlessly carrying around hate. i found a quote that feels relevant:
Hating people is like burning down your own house to get rid of a rat.
- Harry Emerson Fosdick
except i was the rat. but the idea is that i was the one who was needlessly suffering from my own feelings. i realized that there was something within myself that i couldn't deal with, and i projected it onto someone else. now that i've come to terms with myself, the hate just isn't there. all it took was a quick little note and we were back to good. and i was really genuinely glad. it feels really good to have no enemies. i think i am suddenly five pounds lighter.
i have made a few new friends recently, which is pretty great. it's so fucking hard to meet people here.. and i hear everyone saying it, not just the socially inept like myself. why aren't we meeting each other? what is the deal?? let's get together, lonely kids! lonely kids unite! and all that jazz.
we briefly had the idea to buy a condo in the city.. thinking it would be a smart investment, since the rent is atrocious and the market is down. little did we know it just isn't down enough. we got an agent and started looking around.. only to find that all we could afford were shitholes way out in VA. so we scrapped that idea and have decided that renting sure has its perks after all. we are not tied to a property for any amount of time, and we can still afford to live in ultra convenient, awesome neighborhoods. maybe when we both get raises and all that we can talk condo again. till now we are happy to rent, but we might be upgrading to a bigger apartment soon, and doing some fun things like painting to make the apartment snazzier and more aesthetically pleasing.
in other news, olivia is coming into dc tonight and i'm excited! she is fantastic.. coming on short notice and all. i have to go find a new wedding dress cause i got royally screwed, which is my own damn fault for being naive. but i have learned and moved on.. and now i'm going to get something fucking beautiful tonight. so.. that's that. wedding stuff is all coming together. we made our invitations and they look just beautiful. i almost cried over them. almost!
wish me luck tonight!