hogwarts magic studies: day nine
Traaaansfiguration! My favorite class, because I was a tricky, tricky person today with the help of my handy dandy assistant fellow teacher. I brought in both a lemon and a Buddha's hand lemon, which is quite probably the most fucked-up fruit you'll ever find, in for the lesson today.
Day Nine: Transfiguration
So, before we begin, I should probably direct you to an image of what a Buddha hand lemon looks like. Here one is, in all its tentacled beauty. Isn't it atrocious? Anyway, I came in holding a lemon and showed it to my kids, talking about Transfiguration being the most difficult branch of magic to do. So, I told them, it probably won't work for you. Don't be disappointed. Remember, in the book, only Hermione managed to do it on her first day. I came up with a horribly complicated series of wand gestures and told them to say: 'magnificorpus malorum' which is probably shitty Latin but was sufficiently puzzling for the children to pronounce. I spent a minute keeping a straight face as the kids butchered the words and the wand sequence, then put the lemon away in our magic cabinet and took them to the 'Transfiguration Classroom' to do our 'real' project, turning lollipops into spiders.
"But that's not real magic!" one of the kids protested.
"It's theoretical magic," I told them.
Step one was wrapping pipe cleaners around the base of the lollipop.
Annnd step two was attaching paper and puffballs to it to make it look like a spider.
And here is what it looks like when it's all done!
That finished, we went back to the classroom and the class sat down on the carpet so I could check on the lemon. I'd been nervously talking about the lemon for the whole time we'd been making spiders, so when I opened the cabinet door and let out a bloodcurdling scream, everyone else screamed too. Then I pulled out the evil fruit and showed it to the class, who started loudly exclaiming over it. "LOOK AT THIS!" I yelled at them "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY LEMON?"
Everyone started talking at once.
"IT HAS TENTACLES!" I declared, waving the thing.
More loud talking as everyone wanted to say something about it.
"Okay, okay," I said, waving my hands for silence. "Who said the spell wrong?"
Everyone looked at each other guiltily. Someone raised a hand. "It was probably me."
"Who was thinking of an octopus?" I demanded.
Everyone professed they'd been thinking of octopi.
"This is why muggles shouldn't do magic!" I declared, labeling the thing a hazard and putting it on the shelf. I gave everyone a passing grade, despite my continued announcements of failing them for this atrocity. XD One of the kids stopped by me on their way to free play.
"That was the most awesomest, most amazing thing I've ever seen," she said, and went to the blocks.
Tomorrow, Diagon Alley and the House Cup!
Day Nine: Transfiguration
So, before we begin, I should probably direct you to an image of what a Buddha hand lemon looks like. Here one is, in all its tentacled beauty. Isn't it atrocious? Anyway, I came in holding a lemon and showed it to my kids, talking about Transfiguration being the most difficult branch of magic to do. So, I told them, it probably won't work for you. Don't be disappointed. Remember, in the book, only Hermione managed to do it on her first day. I came up with a horribly complicated series of wand gestures and told them to say: 'magnificorpus malorum' which is probably shitty Latin but was sufficiently puzzling for the children to pronounce. I spent a minute keeping a straight face as the kids butchered the words and the wand sequence, then put the lemon away in our magic cabinet and took them to the 'Transfiguration Classroom' to do our 'real' project, turning lollipops into spiders.
"But that's not real magic!" one of the kids protested.
"It's theoretical magic," I told them.
Step one was wrapping pipe cleaners around the base of the lollipop.
Annnd step two was attaching paper and puffballs to it to make it look like a spider.
And here is what it looks like when it's all done!
That finished, we went back to the classroom and the class sat down on the carpet so I could check on the lemon. I'd been nervously talking about the lemon for the whole time we'd been making spiders, so when I opened the cabinet door and let out a bloodcurdling scream, everyone else screamed too. Then I pulled out the evil fruit and showed it to the class, who started loudly exclaiming over it. "LOOK AT THIS!" I yelled at them "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY LEMON?"
Everyone started talking at once.
"IT HAS TENTACLES!" I declared, waving the thing.
More loud talking as everyone wanted to say something about it.
"Okay, okay," I said, waving my hands for silence. "Who said the spell wrong?"
Everyone looked at each other guiltily. Someone raised a hand. "It was probably me."
"Who was thinking of an octopus?" I demanded.
Everyone professed they'd been thinking of octopi.
"This is why muggles shouldn't do magic!" I declared, labeling the thing a hazard and putting it on the shelf. I gave everyone a passing grade, despite my continued announcements of failing them for this atrocity. XD One of the kids stopped by me on their way to free play.
"That was the most awesomest, most amazing thing I've ever seen," she said, and went to the blocks.
Tomorrow, Diagon Alley and the House Cup!