Blessed Lammas - or How to Make REAL Cornbread
I want y'all to imagine my voice as the most heavily accented southern female you can think of. I do a fair turn on Blanche Devereaux as well as Julia Sugarbaker when I set my mind to it. But you can think Vivien's Scarlett O'Hara, or Eudora Welty, or whatever else floats your boat.
There are things in this world that are just meant to be Southern. Things that shouldn't be messed with: Sweet Iced Tea, BBQ and above all, especially this time of year, above all these DO NOT MESS WITH CORNBREAD!!! Just because you CAN never means that you SHOULD!
If you had the misfortune to be born above the Mason Dixon line, or worse, somewhere west of the Mississippi, then you may not have had the advantage of growing up knowing certain things. Like for instance, that you cannot, by virtue of marriage BECOME Southern, nor can it be accomplished by having the children of marriage to said Southerner. After all, as my grandmother - and other notable Southern women have said, "If the cat had kittens in the oven, we still wouldn't call them biscuits, now, would we?" There are just some things that are inherent in the psyche of the Southern woman. Notice I did NOT say 'Southern Belle'. Vapid Southern Belles make me fractious, what with all their manipulatin' and connivin' and schemin' to get men to do the things they want them to. A Southern woman possesses all the know how and fortitude to do all those things herself...and can STILL persuade most men, Southern or not, to do them if she wishes. Bosom and blue eyes notwithstandin', most Southern women are possessed of such charm of personality that it would depress any man to see her inconvenienced in any manner, made to wait, or heaven forbid, given some imitation of the luxuries of Southern Living.
At this point in the proceedin's, let me say this: Some of the nicest, most wonderful people I know do NOT come from the South. I am not quite sure how this is true, but it is and I acknowledge it as fact. Why, we are 'up north' they enjoy making us ASK for SWEET Iced Tea or put on their menus that it is 'only available 'in season' is quite beyond my powers of comprehension, and again, beyond the scope of this article. That said, let us move onward.
When making the aforementioned Cornbread (yes, it is capitalized for a reason), one absolutely must use, or somehow procure the use, of an iron skillet. Such instruments are usually family heirlooms passed down from generation to generation with loving care applied in the form of 'seasonin'. This "seasonin'" must come from no other source than rendered animal fat, preferably of the swine variety, but beef will do in a pinch for single use. This seasonin' was kept in a round tin on the top of the gas stove in the house I grew up in. It was also kept in a mason jar on my grandmother's stove as well as in the home of each of my aunts and uncles. I chose to stay traditional and mine is in a quart mason jar. This seasonin' is rendered from many fryin's of the meat of swine, otherwise known as pig. Meat from this animal, considered by some unenlightened folk to be unclean, is the absolutely best source of the rendered fat that should season an iron skillet.
A tablespoon or two of this rendering will magically transform the surface of any iron skillet that has seen sufficient wear to become a magnet for food. Food should never (will never) stick to a properly cared for iron skillet. Fryin' bacon renders excellent seasonin' fat and is the primary method for seasonin' iron skillets. For a new, unseasoned iron skillet, the process is a bit more complicated and beyond the scope of this article. Cleanin' a seasoned iron skillet is as simple as wipin' it out, or at best, runnin' extremely hot water into it and usin' the combination of the heated water's temperature and wipin' with a bit of 'elbow grease' (the topic of another article) to remove any traces of the preparation and leavin' the smooth, unblemished iron ready for the next meal. One should never ever mistreat an iron skillet of one's own or borrowed from another family member with anythin' but the deepest reverence and respect for returnin' it in the same (or better) condition than in which it was borrowed.
So we start with a properly seasoned iron skillet, addin' two tablespoons of the stored fat renderin's (commonly called "drippins'). Into a heated iron skillet we put the followin':
Now, you can tweak this dependin' on if you have yellow cornmeal or white. There are endless debates on whether or not sugar belongs in cornbread because it is thought that yellow cornmeal isn't as sweet as the bleached, but it's just an excuse to add sugar to somethin' that is already perfect if you ask me (and you kinda did by readin' this). Well, it DOESN'T belong in REAL cornbread. However, you CAN, and many do, substitute self-risin' cornmeal MIX for the flour, bakin' powder, salt and bakin' soda. In fact, I usually make enough to double this recipe....except you don't need extra drippins - which is also another excuse to add more fat to an already cholesterol laden comfort food. One must always have a notion for the proper care of the body, you know.
You can ALSO substitute the buttermilk for regular whole milk -especially if it's a few days past the expiration date and gone sour. You can also add a tablespoon of sour cream if you're using regular whole milk that has not expired. If you've ever wondered what on earth could be done with soured milk, there's your answer. That's why you sometimes got hold of a carton or jug of soured milk in your refrigerator when you were a kid...your momma left it there because cornbread was imminent on the menu. Here I will politely refuse to address possibilities where sour milk was present in the refrigerator in households where cornbread was never served since I class that in the same category as the pink ring of funk around an uncleaned toilet or mold/mildew on the bottom of a shower curtain. You just don't let that happen.
Once again, while this recipe will guarantee you a good solid contender for any contest requirin' REAL SOUTHERN CORNBREAD, it will not, in any way, shape or form render the maker a Southerner if they did not have that virtue by birth and is not meant to imply such by appearing her for the consuption of all and sundry. American by birth, Southern by the grace of the gods! Yeeehaw!
There are things in this world that are just meant to be Southern. Things that shouldn't be messed with: Sweet Iced Tea, BBQ and above all, especially this time of year, above all these DO NOT MESS WITH CORNBREAD!!! Just because you CAN never means that you SHOULD!
If you had the misfortune to be born above the Mason Dixon line, or worse, somewhere west of the Mississippi, then you may not have had the advantage of growing up knowing certain things. Like for instance, that you cannot, by virtue of marriage BECOME Southern, nor can it be accomplished by having the children of marriage to said Southerner. After all, as my grandmother - and other notable Southern women have said, "If the cat had kittens in the oven, we still wouldn't call them biscuits, now, would we?" There are just some things that are inherent in the psyche of the Southern woman. Notice I did NOT say 'Southern Belle'. Vapid Southern Belles make me fractious, what with all their manipulatin' and connivin' and schemin' to get men to do the things they want them to. A Southern woman possesses all the know how and fortitude to do all those things herself...and can STILL persuade most men, Southern or not, to do them if she wishes. Bosom and blue eyes notwithstandin', most Southern women are possessed of such charm of personality that it would depress any man to see her inconvenienced in any manner, made to wait, or heaven forbid, given some imitation of the luxuries of Southern Living.
At this point in the proceedin's, let me say this: Some of the nicest, most wonderful people I know do NOT come from the South. I am not quite sure how this is true, but it is and I acknowledge it as fact. Why, we are 'up north' they enjoy making us ASK for SWEET Iced Tea or put on their menus that it is 'only available 'in season' is quite beyond my powers of comprehension, and again, beyond the scope of this article. That said, let us move onward.
When making the aforementioned Cornbread (yes, it is capitalized for a reason), one absolutely must use, or somehow procure the use, of an iron skillet. Such instruments are usually family heirlooms passed down from generation to generation with loving care applied in the form of 'seasonin'. This "seasonin'" must come from no other source than rendered animal fat, preferably of the swine variety, but beef will do in a pinch for single use. This seasonin' was kept in a round tin on the top of the gas stove in the house I grew up in. It was also kept in a mason jar on my grandmother's stove as well as in the home of each of my aunts and uncles. I chose to stay traditional and mine is in a quart mason jar. This seasonin' is rendered from many fryin's of the meat of swine, otherwise known as pig. Meat from this animal, considered by some unenlightened folk to be unclean, is the absolutely best source of the rendered fat that should season an iron skillet.
A tablespoon or two of this rendering will magically transform the surface of any iron skillet that has seen sufficient wear to become a magnet for food. Food should never (will never) stick to a properly cared for iron skillet. Fryin' bacon renders excellent seasonin' fat and is the primary method for seasonin' iron skillets. For a new, unseasoned iron skillet, the process is a bit more complicated and beyond the scope of this article. Cleanin' a seasoned iron skillet is as simple as wipin' it out, or at best, runnin' extremely hot water into it and usin' the combination of the heated water's temperature and wipin' with a bit of 'elbow grease' (the topic of another article) to remove any traces of the preparation and leavin' the smooth, unblemished iron ready for the next meal. One should never ever mistreat an iron skillet of one's own or borrowed from another family member with anythin' but the deepest reverence and respect for returnin' it in the same (or better) condition than in which it was borrowed.
So we start with a properly seasoned iron skillet, addin' two tablespoons of the stored fat renderin's (commonly called "drippins'). Into a heated iron skillet we put the followin':
- 2 tablespoons bacon drippins (for the love of all you hold holy do NOT substitute vegetable oil for the animal fat. The reason for this should be obvious, but alas, I can't go into that as it to is beyond the scope of this article. It is so sad that common sense is no longer common, but I digress)
- 1 cup cornmeal
- 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
- 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1 egg
- 1 cup buttermilk
- Pour the wet ingredients slowly into the dry until smooth and then pour into a waitin' (again very hot) iron skillet.
- Bake at 425 degrees for 10-15 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.
Now, you can tweak this dependin' on if you have yellow cornmeal or white. There are endless debates on whether or not sugar belongs in cornbread because it is thought that yellow cornmeal isn't as sweet as the bleached, but it's just an excuse to add sugar to somethin' that is already perfect if you ask me (and you kinda did by readin' this). Well, it DOESN'T belong in REAL cornbread. However, you CAN, and many do, substitute self-risin' cornmeal MIX for the flour, bakin' powder, salt and bakin' soda. In fact, I usually make enough to double this recipe....except you don't need extra drippins - which is also another excuse to add more fat to an already cholesterol laden comfort food. One must always have a notion for the proper care of the body, you know.
You can ALSO substitute the buttermilk for regular whole milk -especially if it's a few days past the expiration date and gone sour. You can also add a tablespoon of sour cream if you're using regular whole milk that has not expired. If you've ever wondered what on earth could be done with soured milk, there's your answer. That's why you sometimes got hold of a carton or jug of soured milk in your refrigerator when you were a kid...your momma left it there because cornbread was imminent on the menu. Here I will politely refuse to address possibilities where sour milk was present in the refrigerator in households where cornbread was never served since I class that in the same category as the pink ring of funk around an uncleaned toilet or mold/mildew on the bottom of a shower curtain. You just don't let that happen.
Once again, while this recipe will guarantee you a good solid contender for any contest requirin' REAL SOUTHERN CORNBREAD, it will not, in any way, shape or form render the maker a Southerner if they did not have that virtue by birth and is not meant to imply such by appearing her for the consuption of all and sundry. American by birth, Southern by the grace of the gods! Yeeehaw!