No music in my heart
I feel like my entire world is falling apart and nobody sees it. I don't want to tell my family that Amr and I broke up for fear that in a couple days, we'll be back together. I know its a vicious cycle that I should just remove myself from, but despite all the shit, unfortunately, I did fall in love. Theres something about him that no one else sees... something that happens when its just him and I together and he's loving and caring, and no lies exist. It just feels perfect and right.
It's just as well... everything has always fucking sucked in my life, and it probably always will. Considering my list of relationships which have all turned to shit, I should have expected this one would to. Maybe I thought I finally got someone right... every guy before was a drug addict, drug dealer, etc. However, I'm thinking I was missing one fault... if it wasn't drugs, the guys were completely molded, manipulated and everything else by their families. It's fucking gay... I hate it, and the idea makes me sick. I hate today... I hate every day, lifes a bitch and then you die... and unfortunately... my whole world is just sadness right now.
It's just as well... everything has always fucking sucked in my life, and it probably always will. Considering my list of relationships which have all turned to shit, I should have expected this one would to. Maybe I thought I finally got someone right... every guy before was a drug addict, drug dealer, etc. However, I'm thinking I was missing one fault... if it wasn't drugs, the guys were completely molded, manipulated and everything else by their families. It's fucking gay... I hate it, and the idea makes me sick. I hate today... I hate every day, lifes a bitch and then you die... and unfortunately... my whole world is just sadness right now.