Fate or odds?
School starts on Monday for me and I'm really stressed out. This entire summer has been amazing and very liberating, but I'm becoming sad. The weather is changing and responsibility starts to take over. I wanted to loose ten pounds before school, but I couldn't force myself to stop eating. The more I try not to eat, the more I consume. I'm like a human garbage disposal. I dreamt about buying diet pills last night. They were the same ones I used to take, except in my dream they were too expensive to buy. I woke up feeling so funny, like I was back in time. Even though two years have passed, I still think about Mike and all of the depression. I remember feeling safe and thin inside the hospital. They didn't make me eat much, only because when I was checked in I wouldn't eat anything. I miss feeling needed by someone. I've been single for 9 months and before that I was single for 8 months. There hasn't been anyone thats shown me more interest than being sexual. I've been good. I haven't had sex for three months. I hooked up with a couple of guys but they aren't boyfriend material. Why are men so horrible? I guess I'm just dissappointed, but really anxious that school will bring on good things. Life has such an unexpected air about it. Hopefully, God has some pleasant suprises in store for me. Thankfully, my faith has been keeping me strong. Other than my family, that's all I have right now.
CW-100 lbs.
HW-107 lbs.
LW-80 lbs.
GW1-95 lbs.
GW2-low
CW-100 lbs.
HW-107 lbs.
LW-80 lbs.
GW1-95 lbs.
GW2-low