Strawberry Scented
Just because he's not used to stuff like this doesn't mean he won't get any better at it. Sure, sometimes he forgets that Kame has man parts he has to make happy, too, but he'll remember once he gets used to their arrangement. Kame doesn't seem to mind, anyway.
"Jin, that's a bit..."
"Oh, uh... Sorry, I just..."
"Yeah, wait. Let me."
Kame twists under him to lie on his stomach. He grabs a pillow and puts it under his waist, propping his backside up, presenting himself, and making it easier for both of them. The scent of his cologne still lingers at his nape. Its fragrance wafts through the air as he sweeps his thick hair to one side. Lying with his arms crossed below his chin, the look of his long hair and beautifully curved waist from behind is a little bit misleading. Anyone would mistake him for a girl. Perhaps, Jin thinks, that's why he finds what they do a little less alienating.
Jin always takes a shower after sex. It's like a ritual. He finds the feeling of dried up bodily secretions and artificial lubricant a bit revolting. He never smells too good, either. The problem in Kame's shower is that everything appears to be scented. Everything is sophisticated and branded; he bets they cost more than his entire wardrobe. He's positive Kame doesn't mind if he uses some, but he never uses Kame's stuff. He doesn't like the perfume-like aroma clinging to his clothes and following him home.
Kame is watching a taped baseball match on his flatscreen when he gets out of the shower. He gathers his clothes from the floor and puts them on piece by piece with fumbling fingers. Once he's all dressed up he stands by the side of the bed and wonders if he should say something. It’s the awkward morning after, only it’s not quite morning yet.
He's at the edge of twiddling his thumbs when Kame's concentration on the baseball game eases up and he asks Jin as in passing, "Want me to fix you up a sandwich?"
Jin scratches the back of his head, not quite sure how he should say it, "Uhm It's okay... I could like... Get something on the way..."
"Oh," The dawning of realization softens Kame's tone, "I guess I'll see you at work then."
"Yeah..."
Jin stuffs his hands into the pockets of his baggy pants and sways uneasily from side to side, waiting for his cue to exit. When it never comes, he slowly drags his feet to the door and tries not to look back.
Kame is engrossed in the baseball match; it’s a classic Giants' game, one that never fails to cheer him up.
Once he hears his front door into clicking into place, he turns the tv off and goes to sleep.
Besides the Cartoon KAT-TUN tapings, the six of them don't really have any reason to meet. They see each other once in two weeks at most, and between that span of time Jin really has no idea what Kame does.
Kame always acts like they don't do what they do when they're with the other members. He treats Jin like an office mate, all business and nothing personal. The first few times, Jin was bewildered with such an attitude, but like all habits he eventually got used to it. No one suspects Kame of having an illicit affair with him, but he's quite sure he'd be a deer caught in the headlights if ever someone asks him something remotely connected to it.
Kame is sleeping on a couch at the far end of the room, dead to the world. Which is lucky for Jin. He doesn't cope too well with only Kame around. He turns into a bumbling, giggly, clueless idiot that he doesn't like one bit.
Kame is curled up into a ball, an uncomfortable position that Jin bets will make all Kame's muscles scream out when he's awake enough to feel them. His brow is furrowed as though he's in the middle of a nightmare.
"Hey, Jin," Koki calls out when he passes by Jin standing spaced out in front of the couch, "Don't bother him, he's had a long week."
And Jin doesn't have any idea if it's because of work or anything personal.
Jin thinks he's in a dream. He vaguely remembers falling asleep after taping. It's dream where he's sprawled out on the couch, the same couch where Kame was sleeping soundly on earlier, though now Kame is not asleep anymore. Kame is lithely moving up his chest, caressing his torso and slowly unbuttoning his white shirt. Every piece of flesh that is exposed with each pop of a button is lavished with wet kisses. He lets out a hiss when one firm nipple is bitten. Kame's hair feels so soft under his fingers, and as he musses up the strands, he liberates the scent of Kame's shampoo. It smells like strawberries.
Kame's tongue dips in his navel and he holds his breath, anticipating what’s to come. The loose pants he wore this morning seem a little too tight now. It's as if he’s about to burst out of them. His grip tightens on Kame's hair, forcing him lower.
Sensing the urgency in Jin's actions, Kame wastes no time in freeing that part of Jin that's under the distended fly, pulsing beneath his palm. He lowers the zipper.
Jin feels the cold air whip through that most sensitive part, and it makes him gasp in surprise.
But just as abrupt as he’s exposed, he’s enveloped by Kame's moisture and warmth, stimulated by that nimble tongue and tight suction.
He fists Kame's hair and moans, never once looking away from the sight on his hips. It’s all so surreal, and yet so natural.
At some point he moans Kame's name countless times, and Kame pauses from what he's doing, wide-eyedly looks up at him as if expecting him to say something. The moment strikes him. Kame has never looked so vulnerable. He realizes it's the first time he has said Kame's name while they were doing...it.
He brings Kame's head lower, forcing him to take more. His thrusts become more hurried. He can feel he's close.
He stills when he comes.
It's not until he tastes himself in Kame's mouth, that he begins to understand: It's not a dream.
The six of them are heading out to the parking lot after a meeting about the show. Junno and Kame are talking to each other while they walk in front of Jin who’s trying to be nonchalant and not care about anybody's business but his.
"So you're going to Kyoto tomorrow?"
Kame grunts an affirmative to the question and Jin can't help but eavesdrop on their conversation.
"Are you going alone again?"
"Yup."
"Sounds good though. Want some company?"
Kame snorts at the proposition, "No, thanks."
Jin can't explain it, but suddenly he's in the mood to visit shrines and temples and old castles.
"So...um...Did you have fun feeding the deer?"
Kame is in the middle of getting rid of the bulky sweater he’s wearing, "Huh?" The question comes out a bit muffled through the knit.
"You went to Kyoto, right?" Jin thinks it's a good time to start unfurling his scarf and getting out of his layers as well.
"Yeah...What does deer have to do with Kyoto?"
"Well...They like go around the streets begging people for food there, don’t they?"
Kame is down to his boxers when he pauses and smiles to himself, "Jin, the deer are in Nara."
"Oh," It’s definitely is not a good time to be embarrassed. Definitely not when he's in the middle of pulling down his pants. From the corner of his eye, he sees Kame take stuff out of the bedside drawer. He quickly averts his gaze when Kame turns in his direction.
All traces of amusement gone, Kame isn't quite looking at him either when he asks, "So...um...Should I keep my boxers on for now?"
Jin can feel his cheeks turning red when he says, "No, it's okay. You can take them off...I mean, If you want to,"
"So...ummm...Do you want me to..." Kame makes a gesture, hoping Jin will get the message.
"Yeah...I mean no! I mean... I should pay you back for last time," Jin's twiddling his thumbs again, avoiding looking at Kame.
"Err...Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I wouldn't mind."
They stand for a minute, not sure what to do next.
"So um," Jin inches closer and starts kissing his neck. It's how they usually start. He goes lower and lower. He doesn't do this too often.
Kame's hands stroke his hair, egging him on. He can feel Kame's lower region stirring to life as he squeezes it in his hands.
Kame groans out loud once he licks from the base to the tip, and then puts it in his mouth. He groans in reply.
It probably isn't good, but he's starting to get hard, too.
"Ow!"
Jin stills midway, "Sorry..."
He starts pulling out but Kame stops him.
"Your knee."
He looks under him and sees his knee pressing on top of Kame's calf. He shuffles so that they're aligned properly, and it isn't as awkward anymore.
"Better?"
"Yeah...definitely," Kame pushes back against him, reminding him of where they were.
He likes seeing Kame's back, the curved waist, in particular. He likes the way his hands fit around them as he grabs Kame and thrusts in. He likes the way Kame leans in and moans that deep guttural moan. He bends forward, lining up his front to Kame's back.
He buries his face in Kame's nape, inhaling the sweet, fruity fragrance. It makes him heady, almost makes him wish he can stay in this comforting niche much longer than he ought to want.
He's spacing out in the shower when someone opens the door. He fumbles for a moment, looking for something to cover himself with before remembering the shower glass is frosted, and that Kame won't be seeing anything he hasn't seen before.
He hears the tap running and the drawers and counters being opened. One counter door remains open much longer than the others. When that counter door gets closed, the tap stops and then the door is closed again.
An unexplainable sort of loneliness sets upon him. Some part of him buried under the denial wishes Kame would’ve joined him in the shower.
He walks home with some girl he met at a bar. She probably is a model, he wasn't really listening, she looks every bit like one anyway: long, wavy, dark hair, slim body, features that are Caucasian with a hint of Japanese. She's exactly his type of girl.
His friends hoot and cheer when they head out of the bar. They all think he hasn't been getting any lately. They all say he has to get back in the game stat. They all think this girl is perfect.
He takes a hold of her hand, and she giggles with that high-pitched girly voice of hers. She keeps giving him coy looks from under her lashes. Everybody knows where this is heading.
At the street corner, he hails a taxi and sends her home.
Kame looks like he's seventeen with such short cropped-hair. Jin does a double-take when they pass each other in the hallway.
Kame says nothing but a casual "yo". Jin thinks it's something he has to get used to.
While waiting for Kame to finish in the shower, Jin has to entertain himself by snooping around the bedroom. He almost topples over a couple of lamps and figurines and whatever strange oddity Kame bought, but he manages not to break anything.
It's starting to get chilly in the room with just a towel wrapped round his waist. The droplets of warm water are turning cold because of the air conditioning. He wishes Kame will finish soon so that they can start getting warm.
He gets under the covers and accidentally kicks over a magazine hidden underneath. His eyes almost pop out when he sees it on the floor. It's a dirty magazine. He knows Kame was into them when they were teens, but he didn't really think Kame would be into it these days.
Kame chooses the moment when Jin is picking up the magazine off the floor to emerge from the bath. He freezes instantly when he sees it in Jin's hand, and then moves instantly to take it from Jin's grasp.
Jin thinks he's probably really embarrassed about it, the way he panics and explains, "This...yeah... I couldn't sleep last night."
He hides it in a drawer and Jin giggles.
He’s in the middle of drying his hair with a towel when Jin asks, "You like girls?"
"I like girls, too," he says it almost too softly that had Jin not been listening intently, he would have missed it entirely.
"Do you think about doing it with girls?"
Kame snorts at that but he keeps moving, not looking directly at Jin, taking some things out of the bedside drawer. He sounds sarcastic when he replies, "Well, duh, I jerk of to Playboy, don't I?"
"Oh,"
He joins Jin under the covers before asking, "Do you still want to do this?"
"I-I don't...mind, really."
A tongue is circling a dark areola when the thought crosses Jin's mind again. This time, he feels he's ready to ask it out loud, "Do you ever...think about doing it to me?"
Kame pretends to not hear it, instead moves up to nibble on Jin's earlobe.
He wants to be spared of the embarrassment of asking it again, so he pokes Kame in the rib. Though it succeeds in nothing but making Kame jerk. He figures there's no way around it.
"Kame, do you ever think about doing it to me?"
Kame groans and grinds against his hip. There's no doubt that there's something there. He buries his face in Jin's neck, and Jin can smell his shampoo.
"I swear, Jin, ask that again, and I probably won't be able to stop myself from doing it."
"So, do it."
Kame is panting above him, laboriously enough that Jin thinks he's near. The feeling of something pressing against his insides has stopped feeling uncomfortable. He can feel himself getting hard. Jin reaches between them to check, and gets surprised at exactly how hard he is. He wonders if Kame finds that something between them strange at all.
There’s just an inch between their faces, and Jin could feel each breath that Kame draws. His lips look invitingly kissable that close, but it ebbs and flows with each thrust. When Jin arches at one particular thrust as Kame finds his target, they come too near that there is nowhere else to go, but to meet.
It's the first time they kissed while having sex.
Jin comes to dinner one night. They don't usually have dinner before they do what they meet to do, but tonight Kame asked if he was hungry, and he was more than willing to take up the offer.
He watches Kame's back from the dining table, and almost laughs at how domestic they're being. He has made himself at home once Kame said he was welcome to deplete the beer supply. If he settles down on the couch and turns on the tv, they'd look like a real couple.
"Your shoulders look tense," Jin comments as he looks over at what Kame's cooking.
"Yeah, filming's become really busy since the finale's coming up."
Jin grabs a hold of those tense shoulders and massages with the same technique as his regular masseuse, making Kame squirm in surprise.
"Stay still or it won't work!"
"But it tickles!"
And then Jin gets the sudden urge to pull Kame close and turn his head back for a kiss.
Kame indulges him, but once it ends, he laughs, "What's that for?"
To Jin, it seems like the perfect time to say something.
Jin wakes up in his bed and is almost blinded by the stark sunlight outside his unscreened window. He's not in the mood to get up, so he turns over and buries his face in his pillow. He smells strawberries, and then he remembers that he crashed into his bed with his hair still wet after he took a shower using Kame's shampoo.
Suddenly, he wishes he spent the night over.
Jin wants to bang his head against the wall at how royally messed up the timing of everything is. He can feel everyone turning cold towards him though they all look like they're trying to be grown up and optimistic about how things worked out. He knows how it is to be hated. He can't believe he has to go through it all over again.
Kame hasn't said anything to him since the announcement, and he desperately wants to explain, but Kame's been avoiding him.
He gets the opportunity during the final Cartoon KAT-TUN shooting when the dressing room is (once again) miraculously occupied my just the two of them.
A hand comes up as he determinedly approaches Kame, effectively stopping him in his tracks.
"Yes, I know," Kame lets out a heavy sigh, "I know, Jin, and I'm not mad...I'm trying not to be. I just need a little time to get over this. I just... It doesn't mean anything, okay? We've been through all this before and we ended up okay, everyone's okay. Just..." Kame laughs bitterly, "I guess it's about time we make up emergency drills for these kinds of things."
Jin feels he's been hit by an invisible bullet somewhere in his chest.
It's like a replay of every night they have dinner together. Kame cooking, and Jin watching him. But this time the day Jin will be going away is that much nearer.
Kame doesn't get surprised when Jin grabs him from behind anymore. He automatically turns his head for the expected kiss.
This time kiss lingers just a little bit longer, and even after it ends, Jin props his head up on Kame's shoulder. Sort of like how Yamapi did in Nobuta wo Produce.
There's that feeling again. The feeling that rouses him to say something. Something he already knows. Those three words.
He takes in a deep breath of Kame's scent. It smells of strawberries, as usual.
"I'm really going to miss you."