Fanfic : Death Note : The Calendar Hung Itself
Title: The Calendar Hung Itself
Fandom: Death Note
Subject: Mello/Matt
Genre: Humor/Silliness
Rating: PG-13 for dirty words & some. . . suggestive. . . suggestions.
Summary: Mello makes an unsettling discovery - Matt's been keeping secrets from him.
Word Count: 1315
Notes: One-shot. I wrote this forever ago, but I had always imagined I might post it somewhere on Valentine's Day. It's sort of ridiculous, and somewhat OOC. You have been warned. Oh and the title is ganked from a Bright Eyes song that has nothing to do with the story. Sorry Conor ily.
The Calendar Hung Itself
Mello stared incredulously at the tattered calendar in his hands. He wasn't entirely sure why he was in possession of such a thing - it certainly wasn't his doing, Matt must have hung it for some unfathomable reason. At first, he'd walked right past it, but he had a terrible tendency to notice if something was different or out of place - you wouldn't be able to tell by looking at him, but Mello was actually a very attentive guy. You had to be, if you wanted to be L's successor. So after studying at the mysterious thing for a minute, he'd made a shocking discovery.
“Matt!” he shouted at the calendar.
Matt (who, Mello knew, was lounging on the sofa just down the hall, because where else would he be?) apparently didn't think whatever Mello was yelling about was important enough to be personally attended to, because he only responded, after a moment of silence, with a halfhearted "Hmm?" Never mind the fact that he was right - his apathetic attitude pissed Mello off anyway. Probably couldn't even bare to put down his goddamn Nintendo for two seconds. It's good to know I'll have someone to count on if I'm ever sinking or something.
"Don't you know what day it is?" Mello hadn't taken his eyes off the incriminating white square marked with a heart.
There was a pause in the muted game music coming from down the hall, and then, "February fourteenth, according to my phone." And the music resumed.
Mello scowled and stormed into the dimly-lit living room where his partner in crime was sprawled out on the couch, finger racing strategically over buttons, face illuminated by only the game screen. Matt glanced up as he entered, paused his game, and sat up - this was going to take awhile, the look on Mello's face told him.
"Yeah, February fourteenth," the blond confirmed with a scowl, "And do you know what that means?"
Matt rested his chin in a gloved hand and furrowed his brows in a parody of deep thought.
"It's Valentine's Day!" Mello hissed.
"Oh, yeah. It is, isn't it?" Matt nodded, reaching for his game again.
"You did know!" Mello pointed an accusatory finger. "And you didn't even tell me!" He slammed both hands into the back of the couch for emphasis.
"Well, obviously, I didn't," the gamer began coolly, "but even if I had, since when would you have cared?" He really didn't understand why Mello was making such a big deal; he'd never cared about trivial things like holidays before. They'd only celebrated Christmas at Wammy's, he remembered vaguely, but most of the children there were too busy to be bothered with the pointless event. And Valentine's Day, of all things. Mello didn't strike him as the romantic type. It didn't surprise him that his friend had forgotten about Valentine's Day's existence, but why he was so upset about it was beyond Matt. He must be stoned.
Mello sighed like he was talking to an idiot (or, more likely, a person of average intelligence.) "Because if you knew something I didn't know, why wouldn't you tell me about it?! That's practically hiding things from me! If you found some clue about Kira's identity, wouldn't you tell me about that?" He sounded almost hurt and it made Matt want to scoff. That totally wasn't fair - Kira was a whole different ballgame. He didn't even belong in the same conversation as Valentine's Day.
"Of course I would," Matt deadpanned. The wheels in his head turned, trying to figure out what the reason behind this bitchfest could be so he could solve the problem and get back to his game. "I just didn't know holidays and shit mattered so much to you. I thought that was more of a chick thing."
"I - fuck you," Mello scowled again, because normally, it wouldn't matter - of course, holidays didn't matter, dammit - but, "Valentine's Day is different."
Matt gave up and turned his attention back to the Nintendo. He was quite done with this guessing game bullshit. "What exactly are you getting at?"
Frustrated by his friend's cluelessness, Mello's hands fisted and he let out a low growl. Did he really have to spell it out? "You know, Valentine's." He couldn't believe Matt would make him say this out loud, that bastard. "You should buy me chocolate."
Ah. So that was it then. Matt sighed for only himself to hear. He should've known it was something like that. "But Mello, don't I buy you chocolate like all the time?" he asked. It was true, to be fair; Mello had never before needed a special occasion to demand his favourite treat.
"We should get drunk and have kinky sex!" Mello suggested persistently.
"And again, don't we do that all the time, anyway?" Matt had realized by this point that Mello didn't actually give a damn about Valentine's Day. He'd just discovered it by accident and decided to use it as an excuse to the only three things he needed to stay alive - booze, sex, and, of course, chocolate. Which he probably hadn't had in a couple of days, due to a tight budget. Still, Matt considered the proposition. If he got drunk enough, Mello might let him top.
That thought led him to another intriguing idea. He grinned evilly to himself before leaning over the back of the couch and taking Mello's chin lovingly, tilting the shorter boy's head towards him. Mello, he of few facial expressions, only scowled into Matt's alluring, ungoggled-for-once eyes.
Matt rested his lips on the blonde's earlobe and whispered, "Don't you think, if we do celebrate Valentine's. . . Shouldn't this be the one day of the year we actually act romantic towards one another?"
"Cut the shit, Matt. I just want you to fuckin' buy me some chocolate," Mello whined.
"Just think about it," Matt urged, his voice bordering singsong. Even as he breathed warmth onto Mello's neck, his tone betrayed a hint of hilarity. "We could drink wine or something, instead of cheap beer. We could make love. . ."
Mello's hands were on his hips now (and Matt grinned to himself because Mello looked so sexy with his hands on his wild, leather-clad hips) and his face was flushed, not with arousal, but irritation. "You know what - fine. Fuck you." He tore away from Matt and stomped out dramatically.
Matt burst out laughing and dropped himself back onto the couch to resume his game. "You know I'm just kidding," he chucked over the lively tune signaling the beginning of a new level.
"You're such an arsehole!" came Mello's cry from down the hall.
"Matt smirked and put his goggles on with a snap, and decided he would go get Mello some chocolate later. Or if he wanted to get traditional, he could make it himself. He toyed with that idea for a second, picturing himself a lovesick Japanese high school girl, and then dismissed it. He'd never touched a stove in his life - it would come out like shit and that would only piss Mello off even more. As far as Mellow was concerned, the thought did not count at all.
Of course, in return, he'd make Mello get him something for White's Day. That was apparently how the holiday worked in Japan, from what he'd learned. How weird. Plus, that would make him the woman in the relationship, which he most certainly was not. Except for in the sexual aspect, which he totally was. But, as individuals, Matt liked to consider himself at least a little more masculine than Mello, who wore his hair long and always dressed in leather. But Matt wasn't the type to get all defensive about his masculinity, so it didn't bother him much. If taking care of his man made him the girl, he supposed he could deal with that.
Fandom: Death Note
Subject: Mello/Matt
Genre: Humor/Silliness
Rating: PG-13 for dirty words & some. . . suggestive. . . suggestions.
Summary: Mello makes an unsettling discovery - Matt's been keeping secrets from him.
Word Count: 1315
Notes: One-shot. I wrote this forever ago, but I had always imagined I might post it somewhere on Valentine's Day. It's sort of ridiculous, and somewhat OOC. You have been warned. Oh and the title is ganked from a Bright Eyes song that has nothing to do with the story. Sorry Conor ily.
The Calendar Hung Itself
Mello stared incredulously at the tattered calendar in his hands. He wasn't entirely sure why he was in possession of such a thing - it certainly wasn't his doing, Matt must have hung it for some unfathomable reason. At first, he'd walked right past it, but he had a terrible tendency to notice if something was different or out of place - you wouldn't be able to tell by looking at him, but Mello was actually a very attentive guy. You had to be, if you wanted to be L's successor. So after studying at the mysterious thing for a minute, he'd made a shocking discovery.
“Matt!” he shouted at the calendar.
Matt (who, Mello knew, was lounging on the sofa just down the hall, because where else would he be?) apparently didn't think whatever Mello was yelling about was important enough to be personally attended to, because he only responded, after a moment of silence, with a halfhearted "Hmm?" Never mind the fact that he was right - his apathetic attitude pissed Mello off anyway. Probably couldn't even bare to put down his goddamn Nintendo for two seconds. It's good to know I'll have someone to count on if I'm ever sinking or something.
"Don't you know what day it is?" Mello hadn't taken his eyes off the incriminating white square marked with a heart.
There was a pause in the muted game music coming from down the hall, and then, "February fourteenth, according to my phone." And the music resumed.
Mello scowled and stormed into the dimly-lit living room where his partner in crime was sprawled out on the couch, finger racing strategically over buttons, face illuminated by only the game screen. Matt glanced up as he entered, paused his game, and sat up - this was going to take awhile, the look on Mello's face told him.
"Yeah, February fourteenth," the blond confirmed with a scowl, "And do you know what that means?"
Matt rested his chin in a gloved hand and furrowed his brows in a parody of deep thought.
"It's Valentine's Day!" Mello hissed.
"Oh, yeah. It is, isn't it?" Matt nodded, reaching for his game again.
"You did know!" Mello pointed an accusatory finger. "And you didn't even tell me!" He slammed both hands into the back of the couch for emphasis.
"Well, obviously, I didn't," the gamer began coolly, "but even if I had, since when would you have cared?" He really didn't understand why Mello was making such a big deal; he'd never cared about trivial things like holidays before. They'd only celebrated Christmas at Wammy's, he remembered vaguely, but most of the children there were too busy to be bothered with the pointless event. And Valentine's Day, of all things. Mello didn't strike him as the romantic type. It didn't surprise him that his friend had forgotten about Valentine's Day's existence, but why he was so upset about it was beyond Matt. He must be stoned.
Mello sighed like he was talking to an idiot (or, more likely, a person of average intelligence.) "Because if you knew something I didn't know, why wouldn't you tell me about it?! That's practically hiding things from me! If you found some clue about Kira's identity, wouldn't you tell me about that?" He sounded almost hurt and it made Matt want to scoff. That totally wasn't fair - Kira was a whole different ballgame. He didn't even belong in the same conversation as Valentine's Day.
"Of course I would," Matt deadpanned. The wheels in his head turned, trying to figure out what the reason behind this bitchfest could be so he could solve the problem and get back to his game. "I just didn't know holidays and shit mattered so much to you. I thought that was more of a chick thing."
"I - fuck you," Mello scowled again, because normally, it wouldn't matter - of course, holidays didn't matter, dammit - but, "Valentine's Day is different."
Matt gave up and turned his attention back to the Nintendo. He was quite done with this guessing game bullshit. "What exactly are you getting at?"
Frustrated by his friend's cluelessness, Mello's hands fisted and he let out a low growl. Did he really have to spell it out? "You know, Valentine's." He couldn't believe Matt would make him say this out loud, that bastard. "You should buy me chocolate."
Ah. So that was it then. Matt sighed for only himself to hear. He should've known it was something like that. "But Mello, don't I buy you chocolate like all the time?" he asked. It was true, to be fair; Mello had never before needed a special occasion to demand his favourite treat.
"We should get drunk and have kinky sex!" Mello suggested persistently.
"And again, don't we do that all the time, anyway?" Matt had realized by this point that Mello didn't actually give a damn about Valentine's Day. He'd just discovered it by accident and decided to use it as an excuse to the only three things he needed to stay alive - booze, sex, and, of course, chocolate. Which he probably hadn't had in a couple of days, due to a tight budget. Still, Matt considered the proposition. If he got drunk enough, Mello might let him top.
That thought led him to another intriguing idea. He grinned evilly to himself before leaning over the back of the couch and taking Mello's chin lovingly, tilting the shorter boy's head towards him. Mello, he of few facial expressions, only scowled into Matt's alluring, ungoggled-for-once eyes.
Matt rested his lips on the blonde's earlobe and whispered, "Don't you think, if we do celebrate Valentine's. . . Shouldn't this be the one day of the year we actually act romantic towards one another?"
"Cut the shit, Matt. I just want you to fuckin' buy me some chocolate," Mello whined.
"Just think about it," Matt urged, his voice bordering singsong. Even as he breathed warmth onto Mello's neck, his tone betrayed a hint of hilarity. "We could drink wine or something, instead of cheap beer. We could make love. . ."
Mello's hands were on his hips now (and Matt grinned to himself because Mello looked so sexy with his hands on his wild, leather-clad hips) and his face was flushed, not with arousal, but irritation. "You know what - fine. Fuck you." He tore away from Matt and stomped out dramatically.
Matt burst out laughing and dropped himself back onto the couch to resume his game. "You know I'm just kidding," he chucked over the lively tune signaling the beginning of a new level.
"You're such an arsehole!" came Mello's cry from down the hall.
"Matt smirked and put his goggles on with a snap, and decided he would go get Mello some chocolate later. Or if he wanted to get traditional, he could make it himself. He toyed with that idea for a second, picturing himself a lovesick Japanese high school girl, and then dismissed it. He'd never touched a stove in his life - it would come out like shit and that would only piss Mello off even more. As far as Mellow was concerned, the thought did not count at all.
Of course, in return, he'd make Mello get him something for White's Day. That was apparently how the holiday worked in Japan, from what he'd learned. How weird. Plus, that would make him the woman in the relationship, which he most certainly was not. Except for in the sexual aspect, which he totally was. But, as individuals, Matt liked to consider himself at least a little more masculine than Mello, who wore his hair long and always dressed in leather. But Matt wasn't the type to get all defensive about his masculinity, so it didn't bother him much. If taking care of his man made him the girl, he supposed he could deal with that.
- x-posted all over
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