(no subject)
So let's sum up, in a nutshell, the ridicules shit that makes up my life.
1. I own my own business -- we're broke. Our yellow page ad goes to print in July, it's $300.00 a month. I spent a small amount of money on 35 business cards...just got them a week ago.
2. My rent is $350/month, I have yet to pay full rent and i've been in my house for 5 months...last month i missed it completely because i had no money.
3. I work THREE (not including my company) jobs. Starbucks, Regal Movie Theater, and Bob Knight Photography. I work approximately 75-80 hrs/wk. I just started these jobs a month ago, so I'm just now starting to see money from them (you know they hold two weeks before you actually get paid anything.)
4. Since I have not paid my rent I'm at risk of being EVICTED - I would of course have no where to go. At that point it would be the military or the street. I'm not fond of either.
So keeping all that fresh in your mind...let me tell you about my day. I approach the washing machine today to take a load of clothes out of the dryer...guess what's in the dryer? MY NEW BUSINESS CARDS!!! Five of them. This pissed me off for two reasons. One, they were expensive. Two, that's even less I can pass out to potential clients. But I suppose that doesn't matter since OUR PHONE WAS DISCONNECTED cause we can't afford to pay it, so the number on the card isn't even any fucking good!!!
Moving on - There was also a FUCKING MARKER IN THE DRYER. THERE IS BLACK INK ALL OVER ALL MY SHIRTS, AND ALL OVER MY ONLY DRESS SHIRT!!! This means two thing. ONE, I have to go to hannah's graduation either looking like a bumb...or in a new shirt which I will have to (number TWO) BUY! I don't have many clothes, I'm poor. I don't wear gucci or AE or fucking AF or whatever other prewashed pretorn preworn overpriced fucking shit that kids buy now adays. I wear walmart or department store clothes - and sometimes if i'm lucky I can afford something nice. I now have to spend money on clothes...money i don't have.
Wait, there's more! I got my paycheck today -- $170.00. That's all the money I have, and I'm $-195 in my bank account. so really I don't have any money, but thanks to a foul up in direct deposit, i actually got my money instead of the bank getting it. there's a little luck i guess. So now with this $170 I have to pay my rent ($350), get a haircut so i don't look like a homeless bumb at my sisters graduation and buy some new clothes. DOES ANYONE ELSE SEE THE PROBLEM?
HOW DO I WORK SO FUCKING HARD AND HAVE NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT??? I don't smoke crack, I don't buy a fifth of whiskey everyday, and I don't fucking spend my money on stupid shit. So how do I have NOTHING!?
So what do I do? I can't pay my rent this month. I have no clothes. I have no money.
And what really burns me, is that in the last 5 months, my mother has sent me almost $1000.00. So why can't I pay my rent? BECAUSE I'M PAYING ALL MY BILLS!!!!! Even with almost a GRAND of handout charity, I can't meet my obligations. Do you know how depressing that is?
I have to pack.
1. I own my own business -- we're broke. Our yellow page ad goes to print in July, it's $300.00 a month. I spent a small amount of money on 35 business cards...just got them a week ago.
2. My rent is $350/month, I have yet to pay full rent and i've been in my house for 5 months...last month i missed it completely because i had no money.
3. I work THREE (not including my company) jobs. Starbucks, Regal Movie Theater, and Bob Knight Photography. I work approximately 75-80 hrs/wk. I just started these jobs a month ago, so I'm just now starting to see money from them (you know they hold two weeks before you actually get paid anything.)
4. Since I have not paid my rent I'm at risk of being EVICTED - I would of course have no where to go. At that point it would be the military or the street. I'm not fond of either.
So keeping all that fresh in your mind...let me tell you about my day. I approach the washing machine today to take a load of clothes out of the dryer...guess what's in the dryer? MY NEW BUSINESS CARDS!!! Five of them. This pissed me off for two reasons. One, they were expensive. Two, that's even less I can pass out to potential clients. But I suppose that doesn't matter since OUR PHONE WAS DISCONNECTED cause we can't afford to pay it, so the number on the card isn't even any fucking good!!!
Moving on - There was also a FUCKING MARKER IN THE DRYER. THERE IS BLACK INK ALL OVER ALL MY SHIRTS, AND ALL OVER MY ONLY DRESS SHIRT!!! This means two thing. ONE, I have to go to hannah's graduation either looking like a bumb...or in a new shirt which I will have to (number TWO) BUY! I don't have many clothes, I'm poor. I don't wear gucci or AE or fucking AF or whatever other prewashed pretorn preworn overpriced fucking shit that kids buy now adays. I wear walmart or department store clothes - and sometimes if i'm lucky I can afford something nice. I now have to spend money on clothes...money i don't have.
Wait, there's more! I got my paycheck today -- $170.00. That's all the money I have, and I'm $-195 in my bank account. so really I don't have any money, but thanks to a foul up in direct deposit, i actually got my money instead of the bank getting it. there's a little luck i guess. So now with this $170 I have to pay my rent ($350), get a haircut so i don't look like a homeless bumb at my sisters graduation and buy some new clothes. DOES ANYONE ELSE SEE THE PROBLEM?
HOW DO I WORK SO FUCKING HARD AND HAVE NOTHING TO SHOW FOR IT??? I don't smoke crack, I don't buy a fifth of whiskey everyday, and I don't fucking spend my money on stupid shit. So how do I have NOTHING!?
So what do I do? I can't pay my rent this month. I have no clothes. I have no money.
And what really burns me, is that in the last 5 months, my mother has sent me almost $1000.00. So why can't I pay my rent? BECAUSE I'M PAYING ALL MY BILLS!!!!! Even with almost a GRAND of handout charity, I can't meet my obligations. Do you know how depressing that is?
I have to pack.