To MuCh On Da DoMe?
What happens if you die today and u was madd at all these people..or you was fighting with someone cuz dey was talkin shit bout you..den you die and u had all these unsolved conflicts that will be on dat person mind forever...or yall was the best of friends and then sumtin happened and you aint cool no more..you talk madd shit bout that person and den BOOM..dey gone..i dont know ever since quadir died madd shit has been going through my mind..like people are really crazy now..dey will take the stupidest thing and make it a deal..oh i want to fight her cuz she gave me a dirty look..are you serious..dis is highschool..who the fuck cares?..people would not be all up in your buisness and would not be worried about you if they wasnt interested in something..i mean do people pop madd shit on some girl sitten in da library reading her book? NO! why because she has nothing that they are interested in..she prollay dressed like a fuckin grandma wit her old ugly sweater and dirty ass shoes..but let it be samantha sitten at the table and all hell breaks loose..look at this hoe blah blah blah..YEA WHY THE FUCK YOU REALLY WORRIED BOUT ME..is it who im friends wit? the pants i got on? the fact that my hair is long? my brown eyes? my fat thighs?..let me know..cuz we all know you aint only poppin shit on me for some dumb ass reason like i looked at you wrong? dis aint directed towards one person i just got so much on my mind right now cuz i really dont understand people..maybe dats why i only talk to a few people right now..cuz i just dont get it and i wish everyone would just grow up?..like isnt it better to have someone sit in your face and be like oh that shirt you got on is ugly or oh you annoying den have dem say it behind your back..dats why i liked being friends wit jenn..she was always real..oh you look fat as hell in stripes..your hair looks ugly up! like damn the shit sounds mean but id rather here it from ya mouth den other people..but how do you be so real and so fake at the same time..you sit there and tell me everything in da book but still have the nerve to pop shit bout me and da way im living..I GOT A ? FOR YOU JENN..DO YOU KNOW WHY MY DADS HOUSE IS SO SMALL? DO YOU KNOW WHY I DONT LIVE WIT MY MOM? DO YOU KNOW WHY I COME TO SCHOOL LOOKIN DA WAY I DO? DO YOU KNOW WHERE I CAME FROM, WHERE I GREW UP AT AND HOW I BECAME WHO I AM? cuz i really dont think you do..so for you to say anything bout the way im living is real lame..and the crazy thing is..you have da nerve to blame it all on brit..and tell me she is popping all the shit..what makes you wanna go around and ruin everyones friendship..everyones happiness? does that make you feel good? probably since you have nothing in your life besides that that will..i dont know what to do..like half of me says i should be friends wit some of these people again..but i got everyone coming from every direction telling me something new and how do i know who to believe..dares no way to prove the truth..damn the world would be so much better if people did not lie..could you just imagine..a drama free life for once..i guess da only way to keep that is to be bymyself..no friends..no relationship..no family..just sammi jo chillen in her own little world..damn i wish bob marley was still alive..dat would be my best friend and we would smoke our problems away everyday..damn right he bout to be my new role model HOLLA. oh yea den i got the people that i try and try and try to remain friends wit and dey just turn there shoulder at me..ok what did i ever do to you besides be there for you..theres just some people in dis world i can not let go of no matter how hard i try for ex. whitney, arielle and more..and i dont know why..what did yall ever do to me that was so grand..that made me wanna hold on so bad..nothing! just ordinary people living there lives..but hey yall made a impact on mine so i hope your happy cuz i sure as hell aint..i wish i was in seventh grade again..before dee decided to turn me black..my life would be so easy..but i would be fat as hell..but thats besides the point..i never dealt wit dis before then..i never dealth with anything..i had fun sitting in room doing nothing..now that seems weird to me if i even go a day doing that..and its not like i dont have friends cuz i do..but i would rather just be by myself..but den it dont feel right..it would be nice to just have that one person there to tell everything to I MEAN EVERYTHING and nothing got to anyone else..but it wont happen like that people will never change and im just gonna have to learn to let it not get to me..from today till whenever i will learn!