i have two essays to write. can you tell?

[itsonlyamodel]

If you knew you were going to die by spontaneously combusting in a most spectacular conflagration and you could choose where and when, where and when would you do it?

(For some reason I imagine myself doing it on a battlefield in the middle of a battle during World War I. Dunno why exactly.)

Comments

[zanzibar_mcbean]

I'll have to ponder my response further but I have a related question:

Now, with spontaneous combustion we don't know what the ignition is, correct?
Here's the question: Is spontaneous combustion extinguishable? Could someone just throw a bucket of water on you? or is it like a grease fire? If you dampened the flames would it just start again right away like trick candles or is the ignition a one shot deal. And why is spontaneous combustion always described as someone's whole body going up in flames? Why doesn't your finger just light and then you stick it in your mouth to put it out?

Food, no Fuel, for thought! Ooooh, SNAP!

[itsonlyamodel]

when a person spontaneously combusts the people around him/her don't think of trying to extiguish the flames, they just stand there in awe.

[zanzibar_mcbean]

But what if you spontaneously combust while falling into water?

[itsonlyamodel]

why the fuck would anyone do that? now you're just wasting my time with your silly and completely unrealistic "what-if"s.

[zanzibar_mcbean]

Now just wait one minute! First of all, we know nothing about spontaneous combustion so nothing can truly be deemed as 'unrealistic'. It also seems slightly ironic that you complain about unrealistic scenarios to a phenomenon that most scientists describe as unrealistic! Lastly, and I quote '...of course this is just to procrastinate...' The principle purpose of your initial inquiry was to waste time so to that I say 'you're very welcome!'

Ha! Also, I still maintain my first questions were very pertinent and we can at least admit the possibility of someone having the presence of mind to attempt to extinguish a person spontaneously combusting. That being said, the answers to my questions become very important!

[padivius]

It doesn't work if you say «Ooooh, SNAP!» yourself! Gah!
Somehow I think that simply burning to death during spontaneous combustion would be a little less torturous than having someone throw water at you, which would result in the lasting pain from the wounds of burning, and would probably only delay the inevitable anyways. I don't think it's possible to stop spontaneous combustion...

No answer to the original question yet...

[zanzibar_mcbean]

That completely depends on when the water is thrown on you - the degree of burns could vary significantly! If it's the difference of me having mild topical burns because someone acted quickly or slowly burning to death it would be an easy choice to make!