(no subject)
it's been a while since I've last updated. I'm sorry LJ. Life has been hectic. Currently my problems lie with my significant other. For security reasons I shall call him 'the other'. . Ever since 'the other' and I have become exclusive I've always felt a distance. A perfect example of this like when last night I have to ask him what is wrong about 20 times before he lets me know that a friend of his is going on hospice. Why can't you just come out with that information when I ask the first time. I obviously know you are upset.
Also, there's been talk and no action about him moving out. WHICH I THINK WILL END THIS RELATIONSHIP. today, he lets me know that tomorrow after work he might "check out a few places". awesome. . .
I thought maybe we moved past this but i guess not. I really think this is going to doom us. and sure maybe we moved a bit fast moving in with each other but the thought of him moving out for no reason other than he doesn't feel this place is his, is bullshit. I'm sorry and I
m trying and maybe it's the fact that my name is on the lease. but come on be a man. allow this to happen until the lease is up and then we can go find a place together. you can scrap the idea that i will come over - because if it is anything like the place you last had - no! i don't want to have to clean two places. forget it.
not only that but this is a total step backwards in our relationship... i've confirmed this with other people too . . . not just my thinking here. . . relationship over.
i feel bad too but what do you want from me. . .
worst part about the whole damn thing is that i was actually thinking that this was it. this was the guy i was going to grow old with. I've never ever ever had that thought before. I guess there will be more. I hate to say that he's my first real love, but maybe he is. and maybe the first loves are always meant to last.
he's such a good guy though. aside from his pride i do love everything about him. he's smart and funny and good with kids, and entertaining and always can make me smile. . . and he has a passion for something other than work. It really means a lot when someone can look past that. . . that they aren't consumed.
i hope everyone can find that passion sometime in their lifetimes.
i wish him the best. i truely do. and i hate to put a cap on this relationship i just don't know how it honestly could work. . . it'll fade and maybe it will be easier on me knowing that now...
well livejournal, i come with heavy heart and i'm sorry. i wish i could share some wonderful information with you and maybe next time i can. until this journey continues. . . . . .
Also, there's been talk and no action about him moving out. WHICH I THINK WILL END THIS RELATIONSHIP. today, he lets me know that tomorrow after work he might "check out a few places". awesome. . .
I thought maybe we moved past this but i guess not. I really think this is going to doom us. and sure maybe we moved a bit fast moving in with each other but the thought of him moving out for no reason other than he doesn't feel this place is his, is bullshit. I'm sorry and I
m trying and maybe it's the fact that my name is on the lease. but come on be a man. allow this to happen until the lease is up and then we can go find a place together. you can scrap the idea that i will come over - because if it is anything like the place you last had - no! i don't want to have to clean two places. forget it.
not only that but this is a total step backwards in our relationship... i've confirmed this with other people too . . . not just my thinking here. . . relationship over.
i feel bad too but what do you want from me. . .
worst part about the whole damn thing is that i was actually thinking that this was it. this was the guy i was going to grow old with. I've never ever ever had that thought before. I guess there will be more. I hate to say that he's my first real love, but maybe he is. and maybe the first loves are always meant to last.
he's such a good guy though. aside from his pride i do love everything about him. he's smart and funny and good with kids, and entertaining and always can make me smile. . . and he has a passion for something other than work. It really means a lot when someone can look past that. . . that they aren't consumed.
i hope everyone can find that passion sometime in their lifetimes.
i wish him the best. i truely do. and i hate to put a cap on this relationship i just don't know how it honestly could work. . . it'll fade and maybe it will be easier on me knowing that now...
well livejournal, i come with heavy heart and i'm sorry. i wish i could share some wonderful information with you and maybe next time i can. until this journey continues. . . . . .