RP LOG with thinbluegee | Rescue Mission

[scotcopper]

Stuart's mobile phone was sitting on a small stone wall about ten paces away from him. He had turned the volume down, but now and again, he could still hear the soft buzz of it vibrating against the old stone. The Tyne River curled around the banks and a little further away was the oldest bridge in Scotland. His face was schooled into a serious frown as he skimmed a rock across the surface of the water, putting enough force behind it for it to almost make it right to the other side. Thankfully that urge to throw up had left him now and had just been replaced by a tight hurt in his chest that felt like it was making it hard to breathe. The dress shirt and tartan sash over his shoulder felt heavy, and it had taken all his effort not to tear it off as soon as he had gotten out of the van and ran down to the riverside.

He tried drawing in another sharp breath, letting it out rapidly as he turfed another rock across the water. Today was finally here. He couldn't believe it. He really, really couldn't believe it. He could hear the phone buzz behind him again and he closed his eyes briefly, looking down at his pristine and polished shoes. Couldn't they just leave him alone?

Gee had left her handbag in the car with Euan. Even her phone was left behind as she walked towards him. She was trying not to curse the fact that her heels seemed intent on sinking through the soft earth. After a couple of paces she just stopped to take them off and walked in stockinged feet as she continued to make her way towards her best friend. It seemed like a surreal location for a heart to heart, but at least they'd found him. He more than looked liked he just wanted to be left alone but it wasn't going to happen. Not until Gee was sure he was okay.

"Stuart," she said softly when she got close enough.

Stuart turned at the voice, the frown going from deep and serious to just plain confused. For all of ten seconds, though, before he sighed and put his hand up to his forehead. He figured the cavalry would be brought in on some level, but not like this. "Christ," he cursed and then looked back to her. "I'm nay gonna jump. You dinnae have to worry." It was a weak joke, came with no real punch. The bridge was all of four or five metres high and the river wasn't that deep. He was rapidly running out of rocks to throw, too. Hardly any bigger than pebbles, so he couldn't tie any to his shoes to throw himself in.

"That's a relief, because as amazing as I look in this dress, I'm not about to risk getting it wet and diving in to save your pale arse." Gee gave him a smile before she moved a little closer. "I know you probably don't want me here, and that's fine, love. It really is. But unfortunately the wedding's running on a schedule. If you need alone time then we just need to work on shuffling things around. And if you don't want to get married, then that's okay too."

Stuart glanced at her with a faint smirk of amusement that disappeared as soon as it reached his lips. He looked back out over the river, his arms now firmly crossed over his chest as he squinted a little in the bright sunlight. It was a perfect day. At least, it should have been. "I choked," he mumbled. "I thought I was fine, and it was all sweet, but then... shit went down back home and I just panicked. Things felt perfect, you know? Then I discover it isnae perfect at all, and maybe this is just all too quick."

Gee frowned as she moved around to stand next to Stuart and reached out to touch his arm lightly. She was starkly aware of the fact that Euan would be watching them, and made sure she wasn't going to do anything that could be construed as a signal. "What makes you think things aren't so perfect? Did Tom do something? What happened, Stuart? It's okay to get nervous, you know. It's okay to not want perfect. The point is that you're marrying the man you love. That the marriage is something you want."

"Callum's wife's pregnant. They've been keeping it from the rest of us for various reasons. Bradie being one of them. They announced it at the family dinner last night. She's something like four months along, and everyone thought it was great. They always wanted a third. Well, everyone but Bradie, who didnae congratulate Callum at all. In fact, really uncharacteristically, he looked like he wanted to deck Cal." Stuart shook his head. "Nothing more was said, until Bradie exploded at Cal in the kitchen this morning, accusing him of pussy-footing around because of him, and nay making the announcement because of Bradie's condition. It was true, that was the exact reason they had waited. Only, it shouldnae matter, aye? Bradie has Kenzie and all that. Only nay. Bradie and Kenzie split five days ago, something he practically screamed at Cal this morning when we were all trying to get ready. I lost it. I just... panicked. Like crazy. Bradie and Cal, they always had everything so in check. It was just too much knowing they were keeping secrets. Then to top it all off, the parents of my ex delivered flowers of congratulations to me at hame. I just had to get oot of there."

"The parents of your..." Gee just shook her head as she became lost for words on that point. That really was just overstepping the boundaries as far as she was concerned. Still, Gee's expression stayed sobered as she processed everything else Stuart had said and let out a slow breath. Braden and Kenzie had called it quits, and Callum was a father again. It really did seem like a couple of secrets that should never have been kept in the first place. "Where's Kenzie now?" she couldn't help asking. "I can see both sides of Callum's news. I sort of understand that they wanted to wait out of respect, but obviously Braden doesn't need that from his own family. He needs to feel as normal as possible. It would have been like a slap to the face. For all of you. Only, you can't control these things, or your brothers. You can't have a crystal ball to tell you this is going to happen on your wedding day, but that still doesn't mean you can't have your wedding day. This is something you should be sharing with Tom, something you get through together. He gets to comfort you, listen to you, be your shoulder to cry on if you need it. Still, I can't really blame you for needing an out. I mean, shit, Stu. When your family explodes... It really explodes."

Stuart let out a heavy, rough breath. "Aye, it's a real hoot," he mumbled sarcastically, looking down at his shoes again. "How am I supposed to get wed when I have one brother who wants to throttle the other, and that brother is angry and upset aboot his break up. He was hiding it so well, nay one suspected a thing. He and Kenzie had been putting up a front for us all. She drove all that way for it, she's coming to the wedding. They're going to stay friends, but it's raw right now. Apparently they've been fighting for weeks, months. They never really got off the ground, but they tried. But she's come back permanently, to live with her folks, and Bradie's chance at being a dad is just gone again. Cal's hurt that Bradie exploded at him when he was just trying to protect him, Gus ran into his ex in-laws at Tesco yesterday and they bitched him oot. This is supposed to be a happy day. How do I make this a happy day again?"

Gee turned in towards Stuart to slip her arms around him in a hug. She glanced over his shoulder back towards where Euan was parked, pointed her thumb to the ground to let him know she still needed time to work on Stuart. "Well, you just keep moving through it. You keep going, because all your brothers want at the end of today is to have seen you happy. They're adults, they know how to push their shit to the side. Hell, maybe now Braden's lost it, and the truth is out he might actually feel better. He and Kenzie won't have to keep acting. Callum won't need to worry about not telling anyone about the pregnancy, and he and Bradie can just work on patching things up. Don't forget there's still a reception for everyone to get pissed at. Alcohol works wonders for you Scots, doesn't it? Gus doesn't need that shit, but apparently this is the time for bastard ex in-laws to have a dig at you guys. He's got his brothers to cheer him up. He's got a wedding to distract him."

"It just feels like the shit hit the fan. Suddenly getting married felt fecking huge. Gus is divorced, Bradie's ex left him because he couldnae have bairns and the lassie we thought was perfect for him just didnae work oot. Look at me. I'm hardly a good track record. I have my bitch ex's parents sending me happy happy joy joy flowers trying to play happy families like the old days, when all I want to do is spit on them and smash the flowers into the nearest wall. Tom and me have a rough track record. What if we're just kidding ourselves?" Stuart asked helplessly. "Things can seem perfect, but then when it comes doon to it, it's just more shit waiting to hit more fans! And Liam's suit was wrong. Do you know what that means? It means we've had our heads up our arses. What if we've had them really up our arses and this turns out to be a mistake?"

"Maybe, but Liam's suit wasn't bad when he was in the lobby earlier. He looked immaculate. Tom fixed that. He got his head out of his arse, and he still just wants to marry you. Nothing is ever perfect, love. Look at me and Euan. Even you had your doubts about our wedding and we did it a lot quicker than you and Tom. I didn't mean to steal your thunder, and I don't want you to think it lessens anything you're doing today. It doesn't. But here's the thing, you can have a shit lead up, and you can have a perfect lead up but the only part that matters is what you feel." Gee let Stuart go so she could look at him again, her hand cupping his face lightly. "This is your chance to start something fresh. To kick start a life with Tom. You've had your rough patches, but that doesn't mean the marriage will be filled with them. And seriously, just fuck your ex's parents. Put them out of your mind. Hell, I'll go back to your place and burn those flowers myself."

Stuart pulled his lips to the side. "Nay need. I left them with Bradie. I think he has enough aggravation in him to have done a good job of them somehow. I feel terrible for him, Gee," he said, getting emotional and feeling close to tears. His voice shook a little but he swallowed it back. "We thought he was on the right track. I feel like I'm rubbing it in his face. I had no idea. Maybe I had my head too far up my arse to even realise they were fighting, too. No one knew. And Cal's going to be a father again, which is awesome. I get to be an uncle again, but... for weeks, I've been thinking this day was going to be perfect. Nothing could touch it. Now it's here, it feels like I was deluded. I take it all back. I think you had the right idea."

Gee frowned as she watched Stuart and pulled him into another hug as she rubbed his back soothingly. "Oh, Stu... It's understandable to be distracted while thinking about a wedding. It's a huge deal. Maybe you handed it over to a planner, but there were still things you had to do and think about. Braden will never hold that against you. He was probably keeping it from you so you didn't feel like you needed to postpone the wedding or anything. Besides, if a relationship is crumbling... sometimes all you can do is watch. It's bollocks, but it's the truth. I hate that Bradie's girl isn't the one. I really do. It also means there's a girl out there for him that will be what he needs. He might just need to lick his wounds again for a wee while."

Stuart closed his eyes, trying to fight through all the confusion he was feeling. He didn't mean to slam on the brakes with the wedding, he just had to get out. He had been so close to a panic attack, it hadn't been funny. It was either this, or drink. A lot. Luckily he had the strength to bypass the pub. He hadn't forgotten about the wedding... or about Tom. He just didn't want to show up when he was wondering if it was even the right time for any of this. They had been together ten or so months now. Almost a year. That didn't sound like a long time, but they had gone to hell and back together. They managed to come out the other side, albeit not completely unscathed. "I just need a tiny wee bit more time," he admitted in a small voice. "I'll get there, just need to make sure I'm nay going to crap myself first. Nay a good look in a kilt."

"I just need to borrow your phone then, okay? I'll let Euan know so he can let Ethan know. He's shitting himself, you know. I've never seen a billionaire look so bloody worried before. He really did look like he might turn into a puddle of sweat and tears. I can even go back and sit in the car if you just want some time alone." She gave him a sympathetic smile before she laid a kiss on Stuart's forehead. "At least this way he can throw some money at whoever he needs to so you get the time you need. And so he can let Tom know..."

"No!" Stuart jumped in, the panic flaring up in him again. "Please, dinnae tell him! He'll think I'm having second thoughts about us, that I did this because I didnae want to marry him. I know him, that's what he'll think. He's probably been waiting for it. I've been acting like a bitch for days. There's just been so much going on, and I havenae been sleeping the best. I kept thinking aboot his accident and how we nearly split for good. Just trying to make some sense of it all before we did this. It doesnae mean I dinnae want it, though. I do. More than anything."

Gee rubbed her hand against Stuart's shoulder. "Okay, okay. Deep breath, love. I'll make sure Ethan doesn't tell him, okay? Or rather Euan will. And I don't think even Ethan wants to take on Euan when he's pissed off enough. It'll be alright. He doesn't have to know. We'll just tell him something else. Anything else. But I still just need to tell Euan to call Ethan, okay? Otherwise Tom's going to start drawing his own conclusions regardless." Gee slipped past Stuart to pick up his abandoned phone and found Euan in the contacts. She dialled the number and when her husband picked up she murmured in a quick repeat of everything she'd just said to Stuart. Gee hung up and set the phone back down before she was right next to Stuart again. "Take all the time you need."

Stuart went over and sat down on the bank of the river. He had initially worried about grass stains, but so be it. Dry cleaning was invented for a reason. After making sure his kilt was pushed down between his legs to cover anything, he rested his elbows on his knees and listened to the water lapping softly on in front of them. "So, what's married life like?" he finally asked her with a sigh.

Gee stayed standing as she watch Stuart and then finally smiled as she dropped her shoes to the ground. "Pretty good, actually. I mean, there's still a few things to work out. I want to take Euan's surname. I think it'll help Ciaran as well as the fact that I'm actually proud to be a Fitzpatrick. He's also going to talk to Ciaran about changing his name, too. The custody hearing's been moved up to Thursday. I can't believe it. I might be a mum soon."

Stuart nodded slowly as he listened and wet his lips. "You dinnae regret doing it so quickly? I know you're going to deny it was quick, but the whole 'we should get married' to the trip up the aisle was quick. I just didnae want you to regret it, or feel like it was only done as some sort of court evidence. The bairn's a lovely wee lad. I cannae blame you for looking forward to things there."

Gee moved to sit down next to Stuart as she exhaled a slow breath and then started to laugh softly. "Honestly? No, I don't. I'm waiting for it... I know that's a horrible thing, but it's not like you didn't completely talk bullshit when you were saying it was too fast, and that it better not be for the wrong reasons. And it's not! It's really not. I love Euan, I love Ciaran and I'm honoured to become part of their family. I know me and Euan haven't been all about the smooth sailing, but we got there. We're here, we're married. It's not a convenience. Euan made sure of that by grilling me thoroughly. I'm doing this because I want it. And my parents were there! They finally met two of the most important boys in my life... And I think they like them. That was the last hurdle, really."

"Makes you wonder what the right formula is. I mean, you think you have it, and then the world feels like it's exploding when someone is telling you that your fiance's cock was in another guy's mouth. Or like Bradie and Kenzie, they seemed to really have it. They got along well, were great friends before they dated. Then it just... stopped working. We thought Gus and his wife had it all in the early days, too, but that just screwed up. What's the secret, Gee? What makes it nay screw up?" Stuart asked, looking away from the water so he could study her face.

Gee held his gaze as she fought the urge to look away and just shrug. "I don't know, Stu. I really don't. I never thought I had the secret. I mean, look at me and what happened with my ex. It sent me into a ridiculously lengthy drought that you broke for me. With Euan, it's just... It shouldn't work, but it does, you know? We still rub each other the wrong way, we still fight. But there's nothing really... final about it all. I don't know how to explain it. I think we're just better when we yell it out and get a chance to move on. We wind up just talking about it all together instead of festering. Mostly. I mean, I'm guilty of festering but it comes out eventually. I think if you really can't talk to each other about what's going on, about how you feel... then there's a problem."

Stuart wet his lips and drew in a long breath. "Do you think you would have gotten married if Ciaran hadnae come into the scene? I'm nay saying that's entirely what the marriage choice was based on. I know he wouldnae have done it unless he wanted to, and he seemed really happy yesterday. He's got the father thing right doon, too. But you have to admit, the laddie changed a hell of a lot for both of you. I think that's what happened to Kenzie and Braden, just in the extreme opposite. I dinnae think he could step up to be the father of her baby when push came to shove. It was too soon after her divorce. He tried to do the right thing, but where Euan nailed it, Bradie couldnae find his footing. And in that sense, you're kinda in Bradie's shoes. You rock the Mum thing, though."

Gee leaned over to bump her shoulder against Stuart's as she smiled. "I still piss my knickers about the Mum thing. I can't help it. I don't even want to start thinking I'm doing a good job in case I just fuck it all up from getting too confident. I think if Ciaran hadn't come onto the scene then it maybe would have taken us a lot longer to get to this point. Having said that, the tattoo happened before Ciaran, and apparently we were ready to get married then. I was just too drunk to remember saying yes the next day. Maybe it was better that it didn't happen that way, though. You know? As for Bradie... As much as he wanted to step up, maybe it was hard to connect to a kid still inside Kenzie if he and Kenzie were having problems as well. If it was too soon after her divorce, she might have just been in a bit more rush to get a father for the kid without realising. I don't know."

Stuart shook his head. "It doesnae work like that. All you need is the laddie's trust, and you have it. At the end of the day, bairns just need to know their parents are there when things arenae feeling right. You're their world, they trust you implicitly. Sounds like he needs that, too. Isnae like his biological mother gave a fecking shite, is it? You were ready to get engaged, that doesnae mean you were ready to marry. Two very different things. Engagement is the easy part, so I'm discovering." He rubbed at his head, trying to force himself to calm down. "I think he and Kenzie were just way better as friends. I overheard him talking to Nana aboot it. He wasnae saying a whole lot, but that was the gist of it. I dinnae think she used him like that. They did have feelings for each other, but Bradie deserves the whole package. She has to focus on dealing with the divorce and coping with what has happened."

"I just don't ever want to do anything to break that trust. Ciaran's too precious, you know? He's this kid that just needs love and to be cared about and nurtured. And yeah, tell me about it. Even when you helped get it into my head that surprising Euan with a wedding was a good idea, I was making myself sick the whole drive up here. I couldn't stop worrying about it all, about telling him, or about the actual wedding. But once it was over and there's a moment to just stop and realise you did it - it's amazing. It really is. I couldn't stop smiling like the biggest dork around." Gee bit back another dorky smile that she could feel threatening to appear just at the memory of how she felt after the wedding. "I know it sucks to know that Braden and Kenzie didn't work out, but there really is nothing you can do now other than just be there for your brother. Same as he wants to be there for you today. Just because there's been a couple of break-ups doesn't mean that's you and Tom. You've already weathered disaster after disaster and you're stronger for it because you got through them together."

Stuart raised his eyebrows, contemplating her with a faint smirk. "And the parent factor? Was I nay right aboot that, hmm? Dinnae get me wrong, I love my family, and I know I ran oot because of them, but I wouldnae if there wasnae so much exploding all over the place. I couldnae have done any of this withoot them. Still cannae. I need them all there with me, and I would bet my life savings on the fact that Euan would have been wishing his folks were there too. You try nay to make a huge deal oot of it, but at the end of the day, you're getting married. It's the forever deal. The One. Most of us dinnae think we would ever find that. Plus that laddie, he'll be a huge part of your life. You'll already find yourself feeling like a mum just because he's Euan's. It's natural. He needs it, too. Needs a mum to be a mum to him. I only met him briefly, but you can see he is still scared and uncertain." He nodded and looked down at his formal shoes, picking at one of the buttons. "Hate having my brothers angry at each other. Bradie and Cal, too. They're like the least likely to do it. It's usually Gus... or me. We have the biggest temper. I wish I could make it better, somehow."

Gee nodded. "Yeah, yeah. You were right about that. You can have all the credit. But Euan didn't want to do it without them either. He refused. He knew I'd regret it if they weren't there. And I just kinda love him all the more for that." Gee reached out to take Stuart's hand and gave it a squeeze. "Honestly, I think the best thing you can do for your brothers is to bring them together with the wedding. They're here for you, they'll be there for you, and it might just help to start nudging them into patching things up. Fights happen, but they're still family, and family is still what will bring them back together. They're going to get even more pissed if they know they're the reasons for you bolting. You've got your whole family worried about you."

"It's ironic. Iain always seemed to be the one who said he didnae have the relationship mojo, but right now he has it better than most of us. God knows what they're all back there thinking. That I got cold feet, probably. It was just the whole situation, not the thought of marrying Tom. It wouldnae be that. He's the best thing that has happened to me in a really long time. Probably ever. Some days, I'm still guilty of finding myself wondering why he wants to marry me. That maybe he might wake up one day and realise how boring I am," Stuart admitted and then smirked. "He would probably be pissed if I told him that. It's just fleeting thoughts. Nothing sticks. Just like he probably wonders occasionally if I'll miss het sex if I marry a guy. Doesnae work like that, though. And with my brothers, it's just so easy to forget we're all grown up now. Still feels like we're kids some days."

"Seems to be the trend. Those of us that have no faith in our mojo somehow get through it. I call it a form of dumb luck. It's not like we do it intentionally. It's just about one step at a time. Sometimes we just get the footing right, sometimes it's wrong." Gee rubbed her thumb against the back of his hand before she smirked. "He wouldn't believe that for a second. You really are kidding yourself if you think you're boring. You're anything but. You'll probably always feel like you and your brothers are kids, and that's okay, but you have to realise too that you're still going through adult problems. Unfortunately they suck a lot worse than just getting a skinned knee."

Stuart put his hand up and nursed his forehead in his palm. He closed his eyes and pressed his lips together. "I hate when they hurt. And I havenae been sleeping well. I keep thinking back to Tom's accident. It's like our whole relationship is playing over in my head again. I didnae know if that was a bad thing or a good thing, just that it was making me a cranky shit because I wasnae getting enough sleep. Then I was yelling at Tom because I really did want a Big Mac, and I dinnae even know where that came from. It just felt like it was all here so quickly and then Bradie's screaming at Cal, and Cal's screaming back because he's a footballer and defending when he's attacked is what he does. I started thinking this whole big wedding thing was a bad idea."

Gee smiled at him before she pointed at herself. "Not that I'm the expert by any means, but it seems to me like big weddings are just going to be like this. Maybe not exactly like this, but there'll always be problems. Just sometimes it might be the actual ceremony not coming together, or the reception place getting double booked, or other family blow-outs or... you know, whatever. Drama. Yours is just very, very close to home. It is home. If you don't want today to happen then just say. We can do whatever the hell you want to do. If you want me and Euan to kidnap you and Tom and take you somewhere private to get married... then we can do that. This is your wedding. It's not meant to be hell."

"Ethan and Sophie's was apparently perfect. The whole fairy tale thing, on Christmas Eve and all. But then, Tom and me are two lads. That's always going to cause issues," Stuart joked with a small laugh. "I do want today to happen. I just... hurt for Bradie. I cannae help it. He was the brother closest to me in age and it was always us together, you know? Shared beds, sat next to each other at the table... all that family stuff. I got shoved next to him when he got car sick and none of the others wanted to sit next to him. I thought he had it all going. I cannae get married withoot my family."

Gee nudged Stuart again as she gave him a pointed look. "Well, you're not doing this without your family, are you? They might be clashing, and hurting, but they're all still ready to be there for you. I know your brothers. As soon as the wedding's due to start they'll just shove everything aside because they know that this is your time to be happy. They're not going to begrudge you this, and they'll probably even feel better for seeing it."

Stuart puffed his cheeks out with a breath and then let it out slowly. "I guess we better hit the road, then. I also dinnae care what all the tradional lovers think. I just want to see Tom for a wee bit before we do this. Even just a few minutes. This whole nay seeing each other before just ended up freaking me oot. Nay my thing," he insisted.

Gee stood up and turned to wave in Euan's direction followed by a thumb's up. She hoped he was watching at that point and not looking at his belly button, or something. She bent down to kiss Stuart's forehead before she winked up him. "Not like me and Euan avoided each other, is it? Maybe that's the real secret to a happy marriage. We can sneak you in for a snog to your husband-to-be. I'll punch anyone's lights out that tries to get in the way of it, too."

Stuart pulled himself up off the grass and brushed his kilt off, trying to make sure he wasn't too ruffled. He hesitated for another few moments before he offered Gee a smile. "I owe you one. I probably would have just sat here all day trying to figure it all oot. I didnae mean to stress anyone oot. I didnae even really think aboot everyone back in Edinburgh waiting. I thought I had more time. But I just... thank you."

Gee smiled back at him as she smoothed the collar of his shirt and readjusted the way the sash sat across his chest. "Just don't make me do this again, okay? Once is enough. This is it, Evans. You do this to me again and I'll be getting grey hairs where there shouldn't be any, and probably having a heart attack." She flashed him another crooked smile before she took his hand to guide him to the car. "But if there is a next time, maybe we can just work out a code word, okay?"

"You mean 'Fuck this, I need out of here' wouldnae cut it?" Stuart asked with a smirk, repeating the last things he had shouted as his family before he filched his grandpa's keys and did a runner. "And there I was thinking it was so classy, too. I'm going to get a nana lecture for swearing when she corners me, I know I will. But this is my wedding day, and if I get through it without throw up or wetting the pants I'm nay wearing, it'll be a complete success."

"Hey, I didn't hear that part so no, it doesn't. You need to let me know what you're up to," Gee replied with a grin before she started to laugh. "Just don't throw up in the Merc, okay? Rental car or not, I still feel unworthy just sitting in it."

Word Count | 5,702