why hello?
randomly went up to ny yesterday with my mom and aunt to visit my sick aunt. boring as hell, i should stayed home.
we got stuck at a gas station in the ghetto for 45 minutes, my dad made me cry, so did my mom, i craved gettin high. fun??
so i got home and was so energetic i downloaded some rockin music and it made me so happy.
music is the only thing good in my life.
god am i missing swim so much. i fuckin lost all my friends it sucks.
i never see jay anymore, my family is so fucked up.
my whole weekend i'm fuckin about to breakdown as everyone around me sits there talkin about shit as i smile innocently around, i swear sometimes i'm trying to convince myself more than others that i'm happy.
i don't care what i do anymore, i crave drugs n alcohol all the time.
i'm a fuckin mess.
& what if i love it?
<3
we got stuck at a gas station in the ghetto for 45 minutes, my dad made me cry, so did my mom, i craved gettin high. fun??
so i got home and was so energetic i downloaded some rockin music and it made me so happy.
music is the only thing good in my life.
god am i missing swim so much. i fuckin lost all my friends it sucks.
i never see jay anymore, my family is so fucked up.
my whole weekend i'm fuckin about to breakdown as everyone around me sits there talkin about shit as i smile innocently around, i swear sometimes i'm trying to convince myself more than others that i'm happy.
i don't care what i do anymore, i crave drugs n alcohol all the time.
i'm a fuckin mess.
& what if i love it?
<3