(no subject)
Been think a lot about the past lately. so much shit happening right now and i dont know where to turn. to be honest im a little scared of myself right now. i dont know how to react to all this emotional stress. guys dont realize how big of an impact they can have on a girl. they can even push her over the edge. when i was in high school all i could think about was how i couldnt wait to just grow up and be on my own. i hated the restrictions i hated the responsablities. but now i realize i had it good. the restrictions made life fun breaking the rules gave you a rush now theres none i can do what i want and wheres the fun in that. the responsablities never went away they just got harder. now its not go to school or get grounded its go to work or get evicted. all i wanted to was to have it simple. i thought i met someone special we spent every day together then all of a sudden he says im his best friend and that hes not trying to play with my emotions hes just trying to have fun that he doesnt want a girlfriend. 2 days later hes got a new girlfriend and expects me to be nice to him. yeah fucking right. im just afraid of what it will do to me. i cant trust myself to be sane right now.