Working through the week - staying on top the best I know how!
SPARE TIME! I could be studying, but today I need to write a little more. This week has been great. I was super tired on Saturday, and particularly Sunday morning. My whole being was a little fatigued; I think it was the yoga catching up with me. 50some classes in 5 weeks will do that to you, I suppose. But Monday went well. Nailed Cobra - I did well. I felt like myself while delivering the posture and something about the way my voice echoed in the cabana of the posture clinic room was pretty impressive. Like somehow in that moment I heard myself, I was stepping up and taking ownership of my future in teaching.
Then we had a hot class with Bikram but Bikram was too tired and unhappy about how hot it was and his AC on the podium wasn’t working properly. I laughed a lot because he was fucking with his ice bucket and the microphone was catching it and amplifying his ice pilfering throughout the class. That made me amused. Then we didn’t have posture clinic after class, but lecture/movie. That was awesome as far as I was concerned. Then we only stayed up until 1AM - which honestly is not that late in this yoga bubble.
I had even had a chance between studying and eating and lecture, to hit a nap. I was energetic through the movie session. But then we went to bed early at 1AM… got up and Tuesday started. A nice lady taught - the same lady who I delivered Cobra to. I had a good class and while my tendon felt a little tender (more than it has in weeks) I figured I’d take it easy on those tendon oriented postures and rock out the rest. That worked.
Then we had lecture!!!! MORE TIME TO STUDY BEFORE posture clinic, so I was happy. Emmy lectured and I always enjoy these lectures. A lot of people don’t…….. I take a lot of notes on what Emmy speaks about. They are the things I used to spend my spare time researching just for fun, but she is talking about them. Bodies and problems and what’s what. I’m happy about this sort of thing, but a lot of people ignore it and write it off as useless.
Then Emmy decided to do Spine Twist adjustments. One by one. THIS IS TEDIOUS for a crowd to sit through, but I was just happy to not be delivering Locust just yet. At the end, my buddies were getting cranky. I also visited some other people during this time and there were people doing a lot of complaining today. I felt rested, fresh, happy to be here today - but as more and more people around me expressed negativity, the more and more I felt my glow start to wane. And what I think bothers me is when people are knocking the experience here altogether. I’m here and every day I feel really glad I came here, even when things get hard. I am glad I left my everyday Issaquah grind to do, think, feel something ANYTHING other than IT work. This whole thing, not going to the office for 9 weeks straight is so valuable to me, I can’t put it into words. And trying to express this, someone of course said something like, “well you better change your life.” Or “get a new job.” You don’t know anything about my life, you don’t know anything about what I went through to get here and what this means to me. Funny - its easy for people to make comments when they know NOTHING about your life, isn’t it?
The negativity at times drags at me. The gossip. It’s like someone cracks the seal on me sometimes and slowly pours out my life force… I’m not seniorita optimistic, but I am so happy to be here, happy I got to do this, still in disbelief that this is my life, that I really get to work on this. I know it’s not as bad as I imagined it to be, to go through all this - so I try and carry myself through with these thoughts… not the converse. I just want to have fun, not to wallow in my own misery… which this is honestly not that miserable. Sure, there’s some ridiculous bullshit that goes on here. I’m not going to lie. There’s extremely irritating things that happen. But I know personally I will miss the company, the people I’ve gotten to know - the ease of calling any of these people up and being able to meet in the hallway at any time without spending a fuckton of money to visit them.
I miss Jim a lot because now I know why I’m so drawn to him. He is always there to fill up my energetic cup. He’s always a source of brilliant, beautiful, energy. His life perspective and his natural way of making things make sense are beyond valuable. I don’t think I’ll be able to come home and look at him the same ever again. Attitude is contagious. I choose to be around him; I’d rather be someone that people only remember laughing around - rather than anything else. And right now I’m having to dig deep and fill my own cup up. But he’s always a phone call away.
Right now all I can see and hear is the echos of his smile and giggles. It’s a relief to leave the lecture behind me and be ready for our class at 5PM.
I know personally I will miss a lot of things here. And to those who won’t miss the company, the silly jokes and memories being created… wow.
As I wrote on my facebook status (want to save it for LJ reading later):
The words we say, the energy we put out - is connected between each and every one of us. Sitting in a chair for a couple of hours is a small task to be asked of us compared to what real hardships exist in this World. I am here to follow my passion - and sometimes it's easy to lose sight of it through the energetic pollution of cranky folks. So I'm reaffirming that I am so lucky to be here - so lucky to get the chance to become a teacher and one day give to students that I haven't even met yet. Such deep gratitude for this opportunity in my life. It would make me nothing more joyful than to serve in this Yoga.
-Angela
Then we had a hot class with Bikram but Bikram was too tired and unhappy about how hot it was and his AC on the podium wasn’t working properly. I laughed a lot because he was fucking with his ice bucket and the microphone was catching it and amplifying his ice pilfering throughout the class. That made me amused. Then we didn’t have posture clinic after class, but lecture/movie. That was awesome as far as I was concerned. Then we only stayed up until 1AM - which honestly is not that late in this yoga bubble.
I had even had a chance between studying and eating and lecture, to hit a nap. I was energetic through the movie session. But then we went to bed early at 1AM… got up and Tuesday started. A nice lady taught - the same lady who I delivered Cobra to. I had a good class and while my tendon felt a little tender (more than it has in weeks) I figured I’d take it easy on those tendon oriented postures and rock out the rest. That worked.
Then we had lecture!!!! MORE TIME TO STUDY BEFORE posture clinic, so I was happy. Emmy lectured and I always enjoy these lectures. A lot of people don’t…….. I take a lot of notes on what Emmy speaks about. They are the things I used to spend my spare time researching just for fun, but she is talking about them. Bodies and problems and what’s what. I’m happy about this sort of thing, but a lot of people ignore it and write it off as useless.
Then Emmy decided to do Spine Twist adjustments. One by one. THIS IS TEDIOUS for a crowd to sit through, but I was just happy to not be delivering Locust just yet. At the end, my buddies were getting cranky. I also visited some other people during this time and there were people doing a lot of complaining today. I felt rested, fresh, happy to be here today - but as more and more people around me expressed negativity, the more and more I felt my glow start to wane. And what I think bothers me is when people are knocking the experience here altogether. I’m here and every day I feel really glad I came here, even when things get hard. I am glad I left my everyday Issaquah grind to do, think, feel something ANYTHING other than IT work. This whole thing, not going to the office for 9 weeks straight is so valuable to me, I can’t put it into words. And trying to express this, someone of course said something like, “well you better change your life.” Or “get a new job.” You don’t know anything about my life, you don’t know anything about what I went through to get here and what this means to me. Funny - its easy for people to make comments when they know NOTHING about your life, isn’t it?
The negativity at times drags at me. The gossip. It’s like someone cracks the seal on me sometimes and slowly pours out my life force… I’m not seniorita optimistic, but I am so happy to be here, happy I got to do this, still in disbelief that this is my life, that I really get to work on this. I know it’s not as bad as I imagined it to be, to go through all this - so I try and carry myself through with these thoughts… not the converse. I just want to have fun, not to wallow in my own misery… which this is honestly not that miserable. Sure, there’s some ridiculous bullshit that goes on here. I’m not going to lie. There’s extremely irritating things that happen. But I know personally I will miss the company, the people I’ve gotten to know - the ease of calling any of these people up and being able to meet in the hallway at any time without spending a fuckton of money to visit them.
I miss Jim a lot because now I know why I’m so drawn to him. He is always there to fill up my energetic cup. He’s always a source of brilliant, beautiful, energy. His life perspective and his natural way of making things make sense are beyond valuable. I don’t think I’ll be able to come home and look at him the same ever again. Attitude is contagious. I choose to be around him; I’d rather be someone that people only remember laughing around - rather than anything else. And right now I’m having to dig deep and fill my own cup up. But he’s always a phone call away.
Right now all I can see and hear is the echos of his smile and giggles. It’s a relief to leave the lecture behind me and be ready for our class at 5PM.
I know personally I will miss a lot of things here. And to those who won’t miss the company, the silly jokes and memories being created… wow.
As I wrote on my facebook status (want to save it for LJ reading later):
The words we say, the energy we put out - is connected between each and every one of us. Sitting in a chair for a couple of hours is a small task to be asked of us compared to what real hardships exist in this World. I am here to follow my passion - and sometimes it's easy to lose sight of it through the energetic pollution of cranky folks. So I'm reaffirming that I am so lucky to be here - so lucky to get the chance to become a teacher and one day give to students that I haven't even met yet. Such deep gratitude for this opportunity in my life. It would make me nothing more joyful than to serve in this Yoga.
-Angela