(no subject)
i am back.
indiana is so flat and boring. no one lives outside of a bubble here.
lauren is coming over today, or at least ben is. i spent the night at their house the other day. our friendship is so strange. we talked very easily the night before. i feel like she's acting differently, like she found out something about me that she likes. while this may be simply terriffic when we're together, its going to make my life so much more screwed up when i get back to massivetwoshits.
and now im wondering if my use of screwed up in the above paragraph was just to further my self pity. i could be accuse of reading to far into everything i do, but i fell as though theres a lot i should know about behind my actions, and reading is the best way to understand them. holy fucking shit: i hate it when im typing fast and i spell feel as fell. im just going to stop correctin myself. ill know what im talking about.
blah blah blah.
i feel like everything i do is baseless. what things do i know as truth to base things off of? everything i percieve may be faulty; i dont really trust my self.
blah blah blah.
and now looking back at the last paragraph i wonder if i was being honest with myself or if i was forcing intellect so that i could feel special and intelligent. sometimes i feel like everything i do is forced. i wish i could just be honest in what i do, at least with myself.
heapie nuew yier
indiana is so flat and boring. no one lives outside of a bubble here.
lauren is coming over today, or at least ben is. i spent the night at their house the other day. our friendship is so strange. we talked very easily the night before. i feel like she's acting differently, like she found out something about me that she likes. while this may be simply terriffic when we're together, its going to make my life so much more screwed up when i get back to massivetwoshits.
and now im wondering if my use of screwed up in the above paragraph was just to further my self pity. i could be accuse of reading to far into everything i do, but i fell as though theres a lot i should know about behind my actions, and reading is the best way to understand them. holy fucking shit: i hate it when im typing fast and i spell feel as fell. im just going to stop correctin myself. ill know what im talking about.
blah blah blah.
i feel like everything i do is baseless. what things do i know as truth to base things off of? everything i percieve may be faulty; i dont really trust my self.
blah blah blah.
and now looking back at the last paragraph i wonder if i was being honest with myself or if i was forcing intellect so that i could feel special and intelligent. sometimes i feel like everything i do is forced. i wish i could just be honest in what i do, at least with myself.
heapie nuew yier