He doesn't even know...
It's 10 o'clock on Saturday morning. Normally I don't write blogs this early in the morning or even on Saturday. So, you must know that something's either really cool or I'm upset with something.
It's the latter.
I really didn't go to sleep happy last night. It was rather frustrating. I think my problem is that I don't exactly understand what it is that I want. I have an image of what I think I want, or what I should want, but it's just not true. I end up fooling myself and others around me.
So what's the problem? Relationships. Duh. I mean what else can get a 22-year-old woman thinking about her life and where's she's going.
I could write and write about how confused I am, but what good does that really do? It doesn't really resolve anything as I end up still confused, but instead of just being in my head, it's written out.
I figured that I would just write about what I know. How I'd like to be treated, what works and what doesn't work, etc. It really won't help my relationship now unless I sit down with him and say, "Hey, you're a jackass, and if you continue being a jackass, we probably won't last past the end of the month." Obviously, I will have to speak to him and figure out a way to say the above a little more nicely.
- Yes, I'm mad/upset. I'll get over it in a few days. -
Let's work on some guildelines for the men. Unfortunately, I don't have many males who would read my blog (Yichao, maybe, but he's too adorable to commit any offenses), so this is really for my girls who get to meet my special guy(s). Tell him what you know Hieu likes! :)
1. Don't tell me you're going to call if you're not. I prefer that you don't tell me at all and just surprise me. Let's keep expectations low. If you start raising them and fail to meet them, I'm just going to be disappointed. Oh, and don't bring things up that you want to do with me but then don't do them. If I mention anything to a guy and he seems interested, I follow through on it. You just can't disappoint people like that.
2. I'm like every girl that you've ever dated! I may be different in a few ways, but the things that I want and need are just like another girl. So, if your last girlfriend didn't like it when you focus the conversation on you, chances are... I don't either. Or, if she loved it when you get dressed up for dates, I will too! What worked or didn't work on her will probably be the same with me. Afterall, aren't you supposed to learn from relationships?
3. Listen and don't forget! I would love it if a boyfriend brought up something I mentioned in a previous conversation. It shows that he's listening and he wants to learn more about me.
4. Continue the courtship. It may get easier after you've been with someone for a while to just forget about the little things. When you're first dating, everything's great. Dates are a little more creative and special. After a while, it's dinner and a movie. It's just staying in. It's a bore... I'm not saying that you have to do anything extravagant, but it should be something more special at least once a month. Do something out of the ordinary. I feel like I've been in a rut in my dating life. Sure, we've been to some great restaurants, but the last time we did something really fun was probably the dog race track. That was back in March? Early April? We're in freaking June now... I want to take my boyfriend to the bull riding at Rawhide. But sometimes I just feel like he's not interested in doing anything other than staying in. There's been numerous times he's come over, I'm all dressed up, and then we decide to stay in. Sometimes I don't mind it, because really, it's just being with him that's the joy. But there's just got to be effort.
5. Okay, last one, and I think it's the most important one - Progression. For me, a relationship has a goal. As two people get to know each other and develop their relationship, the relationship should be progressing. I really feel that I'm in the same spot I was three months ago. Not good. I've figured out on my own that timelines don't work. At the same time, I think that I should have a good feeling of where we're going and what our next step is. There are days when I wake up and feel as though I'm in a "Friends with Benefits" type relationship. That's not the way it should be after 6 months of dating. It's a huge step backward.
I'm watching Antiques Roadshow. Going to go shopping for Dad's Day and then working out. I think I'm staying in tonight.. by myself.
It's the latter.
I really didn't go to sleep happy last night. It was rather frustrating. I think my problem is that I don't exactly understand what it is that I want. I have an image of what I think I want, or what I should want, but it's just not true. I end up fooling myself and others around me.
So what's the problem? Relationships. Duh. I mean what else can get a 22-year-old woman thinking about her life and where's she's going.
I could write and write about how confused I am, but what good does that really do? It doesn't really resolve anything as I end up still confused, but instead of just being in my head, it's written out.
I figured that I would just write about what I know. How I'd like to be treated, what works and what doesn't work, etc. It really won't help my relationship now unless I sit down with him and say, "Hey, you're a jackass, and if you continue being a jackass, we probably won't last past the end of the month." Obviously, I will have to speak to him and figure out a way to say the above a little more nicely.
- Yes, I'm mad/upset. I'll get over it in a few days. -
Let's work on some guildelines for the men. Unfortunately, I don't have many males who would read my blog (Yichao, maybe, but he's too adorable to commit any offenses), so this is really for my girls who get to meet my special guy(s). Tell him what you know Hieu likes! :)
1. Don't tell me you're going to call if you're not. I prefer that you don't tell me at all and just surprise me. Let's keep expectations low. If you start raising them and fail to meet them, I'm just going to be disappointed. Oh, and don't bring things up that you want to do with me but then don't do them. If I mention anything to a guy and he seems interested, I follow through on it. You just can't disappoint people like that.
2. I'm like every girl that you've ever dated! I may be different in a few ways, but the things that I want and need are just like another girl. So, if your last girlfriend didn't like it when you focus the conversation on you, chances are... I don't either. Or, if she loved it when you get dressed up for dates, I will too! What worked or didn't work on her will probably be the same with me. Afterall, aren't you supposed to learn from relationships?
3. Listen and don't forget! I would love it if a boyfriend brought up something I mentioned in a previous conversation. It shows that he's listening and he wants to learn more about me.
4. Continue the courtship. It may get easier after you've been with someone for a while to just forget about the little things. When you're first dating, everything's great. Dates are a little more creative and special. After a while, it's dinner and a movie. It's just staying in. It's a bore... I'm not saying that you have to do anything extravagant, but it should be something more special at least once a month. Do something out of the ordinary. I feel like I've been in a rut in my dating life. Sure, we've been to some great restaurants, but the last time we did something really fun was probably the dog race track. That was back in March? Early April? We're in freaking June now... I want to take my boyfriend to the bull riding at Rawhide. But sometimes I just feel like he's not interested in doing anything other than staying in. There's been numerous times he's come over, I'm all dressed up, and then we decide to stay in. Sometimes I don't mind it, because really, it's just being with him that's the joy. But there's just got to be effort.
5. Okay, last one, and I think it's the most important one - Progression. For me, a relationship has a goal. As two people get to know each other and develop their relationship, the relationship should be progressing. I really feel that I'm in the same spot I was three months ago. Not good. I've figured out on my own that timelines don't work. At the same time, I think that I should have a good feeling of where we're going and what our next step is. There are days when I wake up and feel as though I'm in a "Friends with Benefits" type relationship. That's not the way it should be after 6 months of dating. It's a huge step backward.
I'm watching Antiques Roadshow. Going to go shopping for Dad's Day and then working out. I think I'm staying in tonight.. by myself.