(no subject)
Sometimes I find myself not updating simply to deny certain people access to my internal thoughts so easily. It's never any of my LJ friends, but obviously other people have access to these readings. At one point this quarter I could actually feel myself becoming more and more reserved. I wanted to shelter myself into a sealed box and never come out--after all, I am a cancer. Certain actions motion certain feelings and events though, and I realized that I have a lot to live for, and believe it or not, life has been pleasant to me in many ways since I've come to this realization. Life is incredibly unpredictable. Right now I'm just swinging with the winds and where they tell me to go. I'm tired of looking into the future. I'm just as equally tired of looking into the past. If it takes every last molecule in my body, I'm going to live life by chance, for the present, and do so with unbridled enthusiasm.
I really do believe things happen for a reason. When we broke up I first felt pain, then anger, then weights being lifted off my shoulders. It hurt me to see her at such a loss for words or even emotions when it happened, but it confirmed to me something I needed to know, if not earlier. People can be fickle and forgetful, but that's human nature, and it's nasty. I've come to realize that change is not a choice, and everyone has to deal with it, including me. So pop open the champagne, and let's celebrate. Who knows where life is going, and who cares. I'm ready to just LIVE. If these past couple weeks are any indication, I shouldn't have any problem doing so. Godspeed my friends, and remember, alcohol in moderation is healthy for the soul. Dancing is too. Sexual relations are nice. Let's not forget vitamins and chinese food. Wonderful vices, I must say. Don't begrudge me now, I haven't listed smoking or skinny dipping.
I really do believe things happen for a reason. When we broke up I first felt pain, then anger, then weights being lifted off my shoulders. It hurt me to see her at such a loss for words or even emotions when it happened, but it confirmed to me something I needed to know, if not earlier. People can be fickle and forgetful, but that's human nature, and it's nasty. I've come to realize that change is not a choice, and everyone has to deal with it, including me. So pop open the champagne, and let's celebrate. Who knows where life is going, and who cares. I'm ready to just LIVE. If these past couple weeks are any indication, I shouldn't have any problem doing so. Godspeed my friends, and remember, alcohol in moderation is healthy for the soul. Dancing is too. Sexual relations are nice. Let's not forget vitamins and chinese food. Wonderful vices, I must say. Don't begrudge me now, I haven't listed smoking or skinny dipping.