Last Full Week
I don't know how I keep it together this time of year but somehow, I'm ahead of the curve. I always have papers to grade but they are under control. I have the study guide and the midterm written and ready to roll. My plans for the week are solid. I feel really, really good about things. But I am definitely ready for this break. All of the fun things that mean holiday...I'm ready.
I think this vacation is going to be a nice mix of everything. We'll have a few days just to do whatever we want. I get the feeling that we'll get out of school rather early on Dec. 20th so that's several days before I leave for Florida. Gianna is hosting Christmas Eve and we're expected there for lunch. Kelli is saying that we need to watch the weather and should determine when we'll leave based on that. She recommended that I bring my packed bag for the trip. I can do that. It's selfish to say so but I would prefer to leave on Christmas Eve instead of Christmas Day. The logistics of it all are what I'm concerning myself with, really. I don't want Kelli to have to drive over an hour north for us to head back down south. But I also was kind of hoping that Matt and I could have Christmas morning to ourselves. There's always a few wrinkles but we'll figure all of that out.
After all of the baking and wrapping and decorating, well...it's time to have a holiday. And I'm really, really looking forward to that.
I miss my mother so much this time of year. Our excitement would be growing. We'd be all full of chatter about the plan for the holiday. I have wondered so much what she'd have thought about Matthew. I wonder if she'd share my sisters' opinions of him. My guess is no. I think that Matt would have loved her dearly and I think she'd have been a chief advocate of him. It's all conjecture at this point, I suppose. I just miss her. I could use a long talk with her. I wish we could have a chat in my dreams. It's been a long, long time since that's happened.
Matthew just emailed me with the exciting news that Barnes & Noble is hiring an assistant manager. He's also got a video conference interview tomorrow morning with a place called 50Floor, an outfit coming into Cleveland. They're looking for an assistant manager as well. Thank GOD he's stepping up his game and doing some interviewing. I'm praying that one of these interviews results in a job. It's been fairly difficult to not foist my own will onto him but he's getting all of this together on his own and ultimately, it's his decision. I'd hate for him to have to go to a job every day that he hates. I'm hoping that he can generally enjoy what he's doing and that his transition back into full-time work doesn't kick his ass. There's a lot that I hope when it comes to Matthew. I love him. I want a life with him. But there's got to be perimeters to this...he's got to have a means to support himself. I must constantly remind myself that it's not cruel to insist upon this. It's probably healthier that I've set that boundary and I'm holding him to it.
One place where we seem to be diverging is the living situation. I could be content with us staying at Georgetown for the foreseeable future and he's already registering discontent with that. We had a guy come out to take measurements for the countertops, the vanity and the cabinets. Now, I'm faced with the choice of whether or not to go with higher end finishes or not. I'm thinking we'll go with the laminate countertops instead of the higher finishes because, really, I would like to live somewhere less crowded but I'm hesitant to make any sudden moves. He thinks I'm throwing money away by doing these updates but while we're living there, I want to at least feel more comfortable with the situation. I think that we could be cozy there for a while. So after we get this remodeling done, I'm going to stay silent on making any moves. We'd do well to sit tight for the season...perhaps even through the summer. Wait and see...that's the name of life, really. Wait and see what happens.
Well, I've got one more class to teach and that's it for Tuesday. Before I know it, we'll be settling into 2020, riding out the winter, looking for the spring blooms to pop. These days are flying. Halfway through my school year, is it even possible? When I assess things from the standpoint of life and its mysteries, I'd have to say that this is the fastest school year yet. And it feels that way. More soon!
Until we meet again...
I think this vacation is going to be a nice mix of everything. We'll have a few days just to do whatever we want. I get the feeling that we'll get out of school rather early on Dec. 20th so that's several days before I leave for Florida. Gianna is hosting Christmas Eve and we're expected there for lunch. Kelli is saying that we need to watch the weather and should determine when we'll leave based on that. She recommended that I bring my packed bag for the trip. I can do that. It's selfish to say so but I would prefer to leave on Christmas Eve instead of Christmas Day. The logistics of it all are what I'm concerning myself with, really. I don't want Kelli to have to drive over an hour north for us to head back down south. But I also was kind of hoping that Matt and I could have Christmas morning to ourselves. There's always a few wrinkles but we'll figure all of that out.
After all of the baking and wrapping and decorating, well...it's time to have a holiday. And I'm really, really looking forward to that.
I miss my mother so much this time of year. Our excitement would be growing. We'd be all full of chatter about the plan for the holiday. I have wondered so much what she'd have thought about Matthew. I wonder if she'd share my sisters' opinions of him. My guess is no. I think that Matt would have loved her dearly and I think she'd have been a chief advocate of him. It's all conjecture at this point, I suppose. I just miss her. I could use a long talk with her. I wish we could have a chat in my dreams. It's been a long, long time since that's happened.
Matthew just emailed me with the exciting news that Barnes & Noble is hiring an assistant manager. He's also got a video conference interview tomorrow morning with a place called 50Floor, an outfit coming into Cleveland. They're looking for an assistant manager as well. Thank GOD he's stepping up his game and doing some interviewing. I'm praying that one of these interviews results in a job. It's been fairly difficult to not foist my own will onto him but he's getting all of this together on his own and ultimately, it's his decision. I'd hate for him to have to go to a job every day that he hates. I'm hoping that he can generally enjoy what he's doing and that his transition back into full-time work doesn't kick his ass. There's a lot that I hope when it comes to Matthew. I love him. I want a life with him. But there's got to be perimeters to this...he's got to have a means to support himself. I must constantly remind myself that it's not cruel to insist upon this. It's probably healthier that I've set that boundary and I'm holding him to it.
One place where we seem to be diverging is the living situation. I could be content with us staying at Georgetown for the foreseeable future and he's already registering discontent with that. We had a guy come out to take measurements for the countertops, the vanity and the cabinets. Now, I'm faced with the choice of whether or not to go with higher end finishes or not. I'm thinking we'll go with the laminate countertops instead of the higher finishes because, really, I would like to live somewhere less crowded but I'm hesitant to make any sudden moves. He thinks I'm throwing money away by doing these updates but while we're living there, I want to at least feel more comfortable with the situation. I think that we could be cozy there for a while. So after we get this remodeling done, I'm going to stay silent on making any moves. We'd do well to sit tight for the season...perhaps even through the summer. Wait and see...that's the name of life, really. Wait and see what happens.
Well, I've got one more class to teach and that's it for Tuesday. Before I know it, we'll be settling into 2020, riding out the winter, looking for the spring blooms to pop. These days are flying. Halfway through my school year, is it even possible? When I assess things from the standpoint of life and its mysteries, I'd have to say that this is the fastest school year yet. And it feels that way. More soon!
Until we meet again...