Countdown begins...
Okay, my birthday countdown actually began yesterday, but I didn't have time to get online and mention it. I'm so scared to turn 18. Granted I'm happy, but at the same time, I'm very angsty about it. No more excuses that I'm a minor...this sucks!
This year has also be turning into a total nightmare with school! I have had nothing but shit thrown at me about Orchestra and AP work and projects since musical ends and I don't even get to see my boy crush! I short: I HATE SCHOOL I'm through (who hasn't heard me say that yet?) and I am totally ready to move on with myself.
Not only am I frustrated with school, I'm feeling depressed about not being the same person I was a year or two ago. I'm such a bitch to everyone now. My brain wanders in the middle of a conversation with someone so they think I'm being rude, I'm excessively sarcastic (that has gotten me in trouble a few times) and I keep thinking people are talking badly about me behind my back. Why do I care all of a sudden? Because I feel horrible inside. I am literally disgusted by myself when I look at my reflection in the mirror. I've been crying alot out of self pity and feel so heart broken when I have no one to talk to. I haven't felt like this since freshman year, and I was depressed then. I don't mean to be mean. This is the prime time that if people could just jump into my skin for a day, they'd realize why I act like this. something is going on in my brain and I don't know what it is and I'm scared.
This year has also be turning into a total nightmare with school! I have had nothing but shit thrown at me about Orchestra and AP work and projects since musical ends and I don't even get to see my boy crush! I short: I HATE SCHOOL I'm through (who hasn't heard me say that yet?) and I am totally ready to move on with myself.
Not only am I frustrated with school, I'm feeling depressed about not being the same person I was a year or two ago. I'm such a bitch to everyone now. My brain wanders in the middle of a conversation with someone so they think I'm being rude, I'm excessively sarcastic (that has gotten me in trouble a few times) and I keep thinking people are talking badly about me behind my back. Why do I care all of a sudden? Because I feel horrible inside. I am literally disgusted by myself when I look at my reflection in the mirror. I've been crying alot out of self pity and feel so heart broken when I have no one to talk to. I haven't felt like this since freshman year, and I was depressed then. I don't mean to be mean. This is the prime time that if people could just jump into my skin for a day, they'd realize why I act like this. something is going on in my brain and I don't know what it is and I'm scared.