I'm not dead
So my craigslist hitch-hiker didn't kill me. She ended up being really cool and we talked the whole way from Lansing to Ann Arbor. I like plesant little situations like that which end up being very nice. Stuff like picking up a stranger that needs a ride doesn't happen everyday. Well, it mostly doesn't happen everyday because I definately don't drive everyday and if I did I would hate my life.
I guess I did suspect it would be a good experience the whole time, but when picking up a college student from Lansing - things might suck. Especially if they are from MSU cause those kids are a bunch of chards. I don't even know what a chard is, but those kids definately are it. I had a interesting conversation with my hitch hiker about the stupid fucking mentality of MSU kids that treat East Lansing like a fucking summer camp. We also talked about how even though Ann Arbor is still very snotty and fake, that it was different than East Lansing because Ann Arbor could exist without the university (though not well). Also in Ann Arbor, the kids have more control over things and I think treat Ann Arbor as a place worth preserving while MSU kids in East Lansing just wanna play grow up and trash shit because it isn't their problem right? I hate responsibility, but I hate people that disrespect whole communities just because they are too ignorant to take any small amount of responsibility. I just don't fucking miss East Lansing really at all. When I was there, I had these breif moments when I could suddenly smell the night air of south campus and imagine I was on my bike just riding. Just me and the moon and a late summer mist rising off the fields. That shit is magical. I miss staying up all night and being a bike pirate sailing across the moon. It is times like that which make my chest feel strong, like every little molecule of oxygen is being taken in by my body and my lungs are working at 1000%. I miss racing my bike with Nathan by the pavilion even though he won everytime. I love that kid. I need to stop being afraid of Detroit so much and get out and do stuff around here. It is kind of hard considering how cold it is lately. Also, considering how much of a homebody I am, I am not good at meeting people. I don't like bars and shit like that - I like making my own food and not going out to eat, I don't drink coffee. Where am I supposed to meet people? Oh well, I'll make it happen. I have only been here for 2.5 months.
Back to East Lansing. So I was in Lansing for another training for my employmentness. After my first day of training I went and did my training homework over at my old coop. Then this dude that lives there right now gave me a history lesson about the Spanish revolution which helped the Chompsky book I'm currently reading make a lot more sense. Then Hoben came downstairs and was like "time for eats ya'll!"
For some reason everytime I am in Lansing, Hoben's girlfriend Liz feeds me. She and Hoben eat as well, but it is always good food and she is really nice (this time it was spagetti squash with peppers, tofu and coconut curry). Hoben then had to do some major studying so I hung out with my friend Simon for a while. Simon is a really good guy and is really earth friendly and stuff. He drinks LaBatt Blue though. Corporate beer Simon? Why not make your own? I love that kid, he is really cool. I then let him study and I ran into my other former room mate Dani. Dani and I talked for a few hours and it was really a good talk. We talked about multi-cultural issues dealing with the environmental movement. I think in the end, I still am uncomfortable with her main point, but it doesn't make it any less relevant or true.
Basically she said that people of color and other populations that have historically been economically discriminated against don't appreciate the current white middle class environmental call to arms because they are kind of "sick of it." As in, people who grew up economically depressed made "sacrifices" such as growing their own vegetables, riding bikes to the grocery store and using grey water systems because they couldn't pay high water bills or afford a car or buy fresh produce. Also, people that haven't made it out of that situation might not engage in those behaviors because they are in survival mode and have less free time. In Dani's words, "If you have $5 to feed your family - you buy big macs, not a bag a lentils."
My discomfort comes when I want to say, "But grey water systems save both money and the planet, why not do it?" But then I think that these words do come from a white middle class place of privilege. I don't think that any of the environmentally friendly things that I do are trends. I am truely interested in biking, recycling and veganism. They feel right for me and I sincerly love being involved in those activities, but my class and family status do effect those ideas. I'm single and have no one to support. My parents take care of themselves. Basically I have just me which opens up a lot of time and I'm not sick of rice and beans because I didn't grow up on it. However, I did grow up on spagetti and I still love it (just without the meat and cheese now). Does being "forced" to grow up a simple life to make ends meet get you out of being environmentally responsible later? It is hard for me to deal with this, especially when there are plenty of people of color both rural and urban involved in environmental movements. I just need to get to the bottom of my discomfort with Dani's words, because as I have said already - they are true. A co worker of mine when I was at LAAN told me that my bike riding reminded her of when she started her family. She said she rode a bike everywhere because they didn't have a car. Now, she won't even ride one for fun.
I want to take this idea farther though because I am uncomfortable with this whole idea of "black people have made it now." This idea of car ownership, affording fast food and other better life through commodities advertisements come from those that control the economy which is still rich white men. So I guess I would say, if people of color reject this white middle class environmental movement, why are they embracing this rich white man lifestyle? This just puts them between two decisions that don't represent them, but who tells you what a good life is? I make $35,000 a year, which I think is a lot, but I am considered the lower end of the middle class (I think?). Who decides where to draw the line where you life is suddenly good? Usually rich white men. If you stand on the boarder of Grosse Point and Detroit you can see the line drawn. When you live on one side of the line you know you have "made it." Not because you make a certain amount of money, but because you live better than those on the other side of the street. That is just the way capitalism is. Make sure you have the poor close to you in order to remind you what you are better than. It is fucked up.
I guess I wish the environmental movement wasn't the image of an Ann Arbor Cafe. I wish the picture of the environmental movement was more real. I wish it was Avalon bakery in Detroit, I wish it was the multi-cultural groups of people growing organic produce IN the City of Detroit. I guess it comes back to capitalism. Rich white men want the image of environmentalism to be a lie. They want it to be "flex fuel" vehicles and Whole Foods because they make money off that. They don't make money off of public transporation and trash picking. It has to be a commodity. Just like rich white men help consumerist driven rappers make it big. I don't know a whole lot about it, but I hear all the time about "true" hip hop culture. It is something I want to learn more about, but those that REALLY love hip hop hate all the shit that suburban kids are imitating.
I guess under it all, there are multi-cultural things happening, they just aren't recognized. It makes me feel good about what is really going on out there other than what is publisized. Also, today I read some more of my book "Chompsky on Anarchism" and it made me feel good about people. Sure he might be talking about idealistic stuff, but it isn't all ideals - it could really happen. Questioning his white privilege and academic disconnect from society are health to fully assess his ideas, but he takes into account the histories of others not like him to further his points. Chompsky is good people.
During my training it was good to be with the group of people that were there. I am meeting a lot of people in the HIV community and they are all so great. Also, I got to see my friend Patti from LAAN. She is great. The HIV community in Michigan is good people.
Every once in a while I need to sit back and enjoy the beauty in people.
One final thought to those of you that made it this far - please comment on the environmental issue. This is something that needs much more thought and some sort of cross cultural dialouge needs to start around this, but maybe it should just be ignored because I am not interested in consumerist environmentalism.
I need food.
PS. in relation to my last post, as I left my training today and walked to the bathroom I practiced swinging my hips. I tried to get sassy and was even thinking about attempting sultry but I didn't get that far. I like thinking I'm pretty.
I guess I did suspect it would be a good experience the whole time, but when picking up a college student from Lansing - things might suck. Especially if they are from MSU cause those kids are a bunch of chards. I don't even know what a chard is, but those kids definately are it. I had a interesting conversation with my hitch hiker about the stupid fucking mentality of MSU kids that treat East Lansing like a fucking summer camp. We also talked about how even though Ann Arbor is still very snotty and fake, that it was different than East Lansing because Ann Arbor could exist without the university (though not well). Also in Ann Arbor, the kids have more control over things and I think treat Ann Arbor as a place worth preserving while MSU kids in East Lansing just wanna play grow up and trash shit because it isn't their problem right? I hate responsibility, but I hate people that disrespect whole communities just because they are too ignorant to take any small amount of responsibility. I just don't fucking miss East Lansing really at all. When I was there, I had these breif moments when I could suddenly smell the night air of south campus and imagine I was on my bike just riding. Just me and the moon and a late summer mist rising off the fields. That shit is magical. I miss staying up all night and being a bike pirate sailing across the moon. It is times like that which make my chest feel strong, like every little molecule of oxygen is being taken in by my body and my lungs are working at 1000%. I miss racing my bike with Nathan by the pavilion even though he won everytime. I love that kid. I need to stop being afraid of Detroit so much and get out and do stuff around here. It is kind of hard considering how cold it is lately. Also, considering how much of a homebody I am, I am not good at meeting people. I don't like bars and shit like that - I like making my own food and not going out to eat, I don't drink coffee. Where am I supposed to meet people? Oh well, I'll make it happen. I have only been here for 2.5 months.
Back to East Lansing. So I was in Lansing for another training for my employmentness. After my first day of training I went and did my training homework over at my old coop. Then this dude that lives there right now gave me a history lesson about the Spanish revolution which helped the Chompsky book I'm currently reading make a lot more sense. Then Hoben came downstairs and was like "time for eats ya'll!"
For some reason everytime I am in Lansing, Hoben's girlfriend Liz feeds me. She and Hoben eat as well, but it is always good food and she is really nice (this time it was spagetti squash with peppers, tofu and coconut curry). Hoben then had to do some major studying so I hung out with my friend Simon for a while. Simon is a really good guy and is really earth friendly and stuff. He drinks LaBatt Blue though. Corporate beer Simon? Why not make your own? I love that kid, he is really cool. I then let him study and I ran into my other former room mate Dani. Dani and I talked for a few hours and it was really a good talk. We talked about multi-cultural issues dealing with the environmental movement. I think in the end, I still am uncomfortable with her main point, but it doesn't make it any less relevant or true.
Basically she said that people of color and other populations that have historically been economically discriminated against don't appreciate the current white middle class environmental call to arms because they are kind of "sick of it." As in, people who grew up economically depressed made "sacrifices" such as growing their own vegetables, riding bikes to the grocery store and using grey water systems because they couldn't pay high water bills or afford a car or buy fresh produce. Also, people that haven't made it out of that situation might not engage in those behaviors because they are in survival mode and have less free time. In Dani's words, "If you have $5 to feed your family - you buy big macs, not a bag a lentils."
My discomfort comes when I want to say, "But grey water systems save both money and the planet, why not do it?" But then I think that these words do come from a white middle class place of privilege. I don't think that any of the environmentally friendly things that I do are trends. I am truely interested in biking, recycling and veganism. They feel right for me and I sincerly love being involved in those activities, but my class and family status do effect those ideas. I'm single and have no one to support. My parents take care of themselves. Basically I have just me which opens up a lot of time and I'm not sick of rice and beans because I didn't grow up on it. However, I did grow up on spagetti and I still love it (just without the meat and cheese now). Does being "forced" to grow up a simple life to make ends meet get you out of being environmentally responsible later? It is hard for me to deal with this, especially when there are plenty of people of color both rural and urban involved in environmental movements. I just need to get to the bottom of my discomfort with Dani's words, because as I have said already - they are true. A co worker of mine when I was at LAAN told me that my bike riding reminded her of when she started her family. She said she rode a bike everywhere because they didn't have a car. Now, she won't even ride one for fun.
I want to take this idea farther though because I am uncomfortable with this whole idea of "black people have made it now." This idea of car ownership, affording fast food and other better life through commodities advertisements come from those that control the economy which is still rich white men. So I guess I would say, if people of color reject this white middle class environmental movement, why are they embracing this rich white man lifestyle? This just puts them between two decisions that don't represent them, but who tells you what a good life is? I make $35,000 a year, which I think is a lot, but I am considered the lower end of the middle class (I think?). Who decides where to draw the line where you life is suddenly good? Usually rich white men. If you stand on the boarder of Grosse Point and Detroit you can see the line drawn. When you live on one side of the line you know you have "made it." Not because you make a certain amount of money, but because you live better than those on the other side of the street. That is just the way capitalism is. Make sure you have the poor close to you in order to remind you what you are better than. It is fucked up.
I guess I wish the environmental movement wasn't the image of an Ann Arbor Cafe. I wish the picture of the environmental movement was more real. I wish it was Avalon bakery in Detroit, I wish it was the multi-cultural groups of people growing organic produce IN the City of Detroit. I guess it comes back to capitalism. Rich white men want the image of environmentalism to be a lie. They want it to be "flex fuel" vehicles and Whole Foods because they make money off that. They don't make money off of public transporation and trash picking. It has to be a commodity. Just like rich white men help consumerist driven rappers make it big. I don't know a whole lot about it, but I hear all the time about "true" hip hop culture. It is something I want to learn more about, but those that REALLY love hip hop hate all the shit that suburban kids are imitating.
I guess under it all, there are multi-cultural things happening, they just aren't recognized. It makes me feel good about what is really going on out there other than what is publisized. Also, today I read some more of my book "Chompsky on Anarchism" and it made me feel good about people. Sure he might be talking about idealistic stuff, but it isn't all ideals - it could really happen. Questioning his white privilege and academic disconnect from society are health to fully assess his ideas, but he takes into account the histories of others not like him to further his points. Chompsky is good people.
During my training it was good to be with the group of people that were there. I am meeting a lot of people in the HIV community and they are all so great. Also, I got to see my friend Patti from LAAN. She is great. The HIV community in Michigan is good people.
Every once in a while I need to sit back and enjoy the beauty in people.
One final thought to those of you that made it this far - please comment on the environmental issue. This is something that needs much more thought and some sort of cross cultural dialouge needs to start around this, but maybe it should just be ignored because I am not interested in consumerist environmentalism.
I need food.
PS. in relation to my last post, as I left my training today and walked to the bathroom I practiced swinging my hips. I tried to get sassy and was even thinking about attempting sultry but I didn't get that far. I like thinking I'm pretty.