We'll all look the same someday...
I've been feeling awful, and guilty and like a fucking coward ever since. I just froze. Watching it all, too scared to make a sound or do anything. I know there was nothing I could do, and that doing anything would just have resulted in my leaving the shop in an ambulance, but I still feel like a selfish, coward twat. If the big guys friends hadn't have been there to pull him, I don't know what would have happened. Anything could of, and all I'd have done was watch it.
I've been fucking hating myself ever since for that.
Was replaying the whole incident in my head all afternoon. Thankfully I had a nice evening planned to get it off my mind, and stop my heart from continually racing.
Met up with Jess that evening for what can only be described as a date, despite my insistence for the last week to all my friends that it wasn't.
Was good though, met up at 5, and went or drinks. Next thing I knew it was 9! Felt really comfortable and relaxed with her, which I very rarely do on first dates. Found out more about her, seeing as the only thing I knew before was her music taste, and liked all I heard.
We ended up at 9:30 going to meet a couple of her friends who she was going on holiday with in the morning. They both seemed very nice... but I do know fear what they will be getting up to on holiday together.
I finally said goodbye at about 10:30, kissed her goodbye, and wished her a nice holiday.
She's not going to be back in Reading till the end of Sept, so I won't get to see her again till then. So I guess it's the waiting game now, hoping to see what happens.
I finally got to bed at 11:30, a little bit drunk, and then proceeded to sleep AWFULLY.
Therefore I am tired, fuzzy and very irritable today!
Up-coming events to look foward to:
Think my bro and emma are coming to Reading next weekend. So it'll be good to see them. (by them I mean Harrison)
Dave and Jessi returning as the married couple from America. Obviously can't wait to have Unit back, but very much looking forward to meeting his wife. I have to believe she must be fairly awesome if Dave decided she was worth marrying!
Football next sunday. Gonna have to prove myself amid all the competition for places. Wouldn't be surpirsed if Sitling decides to Bench me for this week to be honest though.
Jess returning to Reading end of September.