Worst week of my life...
So, not only have I been grounded--my life practically locked away by a door that I'm not even allowed to close--but I just lost a huge part of my heart to hardware. My scanner software had an issue with the new windows update and therefore killed my computer. We tried restoring back to two months ago, but the program failed. I saved all of my pictures to my back-up drive (G) and we decided to try and restore it to the original state and just put all of my pictures back.
That didn't happen.
We (my father and I) didn't think to remove my G drive before restoring my computer and the restore disk cleared EVERYTHING.
To people who don't do much on their computers, this may not seem like much. To me, this is a catastrophe.
I lost: 4,000 photos. A ton of cds and playlists. Photoshop.
I lost 3 years of my life to hardware.
Pictures of Jeremy, Dominic, Aaron, Mitchell, Stuart, Mario... They're all gone.
My unsubmitted artwork. All gone.
The source of my art including my Kodak software in order to upload photographs, my scanner, and Photoshop... Gone.
Conversations on AIM that meant something to me, like the ones I had with Dom, Stuart, and Lauren... Like a diary thrown into the fireplace. I'll never read those pages again.
My unfinished poetry... the ones that I hadn't yet found a solution to their crappiness.
AIM. I just had to download the newest "Triton" version of it. I HATE it with a passion. It's too futuristic and bold. I liked the old one. The one I knew the ropes to.
It's all bullshit.
My friend Dylan is going to give me PS9. I'll have to relearn the program.
I DON'T EVEN HAVE MY OLD FONTS, DAMMIT.
I went to go change my font to Bradley Hand (my standard AIM font). Yeah, I don't even have it. All the fonts that I've downloaded in the past 3 years are gone. All the Photoshop brushes and textiles and random shit that I've had forever...that were a part of my life.
It's gone.
The thing is, even after losing the 4000 photos, I was still okay...
It wasn't until I got on my computer and realized I have no custom desktop or AIM or fonts or things that used to be so minimal to me, but at least familiar... it wasn't until then that I've wanted to be hit by a car.
It's as if my home just went up in flames, and I'm starting from scratch.
....I didn't even have to start from scratch when I got this computer... I was able to transfer my life from the computer I had from the time I was 10 to this computer that I got when I was not quite 14.
Oh, and I was barely able to eat dinner tonight. My own father doesn't even know that I CANNOT eat spicy food. You know what he made for dinner? HOT Buffalo wings. I don't eat wings, either. I forced down 2 fucking spicy wings for nutrition, and some creamed corn, and left the kitchen. I hate living here.
The only upbeat thing I have to write on this blog is that I drew a picture of a rose for Mario today, and watercolour painted it. It turned out well, and I had him drive over for 2 seconds so I could give it to him and see him.
That didn't happen.
We (my father and I) didn't think to remove my G drive before restoring my computer and the restore disk cleared EVERYTHING.
To people who don't do much on their computers, this may not seem like much. To me, this is a catastrophe.
I lost: 4,000 photos. A ton of cds and playlists. Photoshop.
I lost 3 years of my life to hardware.
Pictures of Jeremy, Dominic, Aaron, Mitchell, Stuart, Mario... They're all gone.
My unsubmitted artwork. All gone.
The source of my art including my Kodak software in order to upload photographs, my scanner, and Photoshop... Gone.
Conversations on AIM that meant something to me, like the ones I had with Dom, Stuart, and Lauren... Like a diary thrown into the fireplace. I'll never read those pages again.
My unfinished poetry... the ones that I hadn't yet found a solution to their crappiness.
AIM. I just had to download the newest "Triton" version of it. I HATE it with a passion. It's too futuristic and bold. I liked the old one. The one I knew the ropes to.
It's all bullshit.
My friend Dylan is going to give me PS9. I'll have to relearn the program.
I DON'T EVEN HAVE MY OLD FONTS, DAMMIT.
I went to go change my font to Bradley Hand (my standard AIM font). Yeah, I don't even have it. All the fonts that I've downloaded in the past 3 years are gone. All the Photoshop brushes and textiles and random shit that I've had forever...that were a part of my life.
It's gone.
The thing is, even after losing the 4000 photos, I was still okay...
It wasn't until I got on my computer and realized I have no custom desktop or AIM or fonts or things that used to be so minimal to me, but at least familiar... it wasn't until then that I've wanted to be hit by a car.
It's as if my home just went up in flames, and I'm starting from scratch.
....I didn't even have to start from scratch when I got this computer... I was able to transfer my life from the computer I had from the time I was 10 to this computer that I got when I was not quite 14.
Oh, and I was barely able to eat dinner tonight. My own father doesn't even know that I CANNOT eat spicy food. You know what he made for dinner? HOT Buffalo wings. I don't eat wings, either. I forced down 2 fucking spicy wings for nutrition, and some creamed corn, and left the kitchen. I hate living here.
The only upbeat thing I have to write on this blog is that I drew a picture of a rose for Mario today, and watercolour painted it. It turned out well, and I had him drive over for 2 seconds so I could give it to him and see him.