A Hole In The World
Title: A Hole In The World
Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell.
Rating: Teen
Summary: Liz's deals with the realization that she has lost Max forever.
Pairings: M/L
Setting: Takes place directly after The End Of The World
Spoilers: Definetly The End Of The World. There are passing phrases that can be linked to Tess, Lies and Video Tape, Sexual Healing and Destiny. There may be others.
It wasn’t until she was alone that she finally realized what she had done.
Sure she said the words, committed the actions and saw the effects that her actions had but it wasn’t until she was truly alone that she realized the full extent of what she had done.
She had changed history, the past wouldn’t repeat itself. She should be happy. The earth was safe. But she was miserable and alone.
She the thought she could have weathered through and taken the heartbreak when the Future version of Max was there. He held her hand, convinced her it was the right thing to do, he gave her soft words of encouragement and held her with so much love and reverence that she would have walked through fire if he told her to.
After all he was her husband. She loved him, although it was in another time she still felt that same bond that she felt with her Max in this time.
She felt close to him. She felt his joy when he recounted their wedding day. She felt his sorrow over the deaths of his families and she knew how hard the last few years had been on him.
She didn’t really know. persay But she felt things from him. Not so much flashes but impressions, emotions and the vague impressions were horrific. She felt feelings that were so strong that she couldn't refuse his request. She couldn't see the broken look in his eye and not do everything in her power to stop him from feeling that way. She could see why he was so desperate to change the past.
She was afraid. Not for the world. That was safe for the moment. She was afraid of what the world would mean to her without Max. Even though she had broken his heart she believed that she would be able to get through this. She knew that most of her strength towards the end was coming from Future Max.
He was holding her together because inside she was falling apart. She hadn’t recognized it but he dulled her pain, stunted her loss at least she had a piece of Max still in this life time. It was only after he faded away and ceased to exist that she realized the complete agony she was in.
She created a world where Max wouldn’t marry her. She mourned the loss of their life and she also mourned the life of the man who had come to visit her a few nights ago. It just seemed so wrong that he was wiped away from the timeline as if he had never existed. He deserved to exist.
Technically he didn’t but her soul recognized that he was supposed to. He was a symbol of Max’s love for her, the promises they promised to one another and the fruitation of their romance and meaning to one another.
Fate couldn’t be so cruel as to discard him as though he never existed in the first place. After the gripping agony moved threw her settled a collective numbness.
She was to be alone.
To watch from the outside as Tess and Max grew closer, and at that moment a steady amount of bile moved to her mouth. She remembered an echo of a similar feeling a few months ago.
Right after Tess first arrived and she was forced to witness them making out on the street corner right across from her family diner.
But this feeling was so much worse, because it was inevitable. They had to be together or else the world would end.
She couldn’t stop what was happening more then she could change the weather.
They were destined, betrothed, married if not in the strictest sense it was written in books, in their genes and in the very fate of the world.
She didn’t think she could take being a cliff note or a side romance to Max. He irrevocably changed her life. She would never be the same person that she was before he met her. She would never be normal. She was ruined for any kind of normal relationship now.
How could she kiss another man and compare him to the very first man who made her see stars, how could she touch a man when she would be comparing him to the man who made her very skin glow, how could she ever become close to another person when she would still be remember the flashes that she had from Max. She meant every word she said to Future Max at the end of their time together.
He was it. There would never be another him.
She felt lost, she was adrift in misery as she began to think of a life without Max. She couldn’t do that. Although it would cut at her heart to see Max become closer to Tess she would grin and bear it just because she couldn’t imagine a life without him in it.
She would distance herself from him for the fate of the world but she would not avoid and extradite herself from him and his orbit. Although she may have denied and hurt him she was still apart of his world. She needed to be apart of his world and God help her she was still going to do everything in her power to help him and protect him and his secret.
She made a decision. The world would be safe she would never speak of the incident with Future Max again and in turn the world would be safe. However her world would have a permanent hole in it because Max left a void that could never be filled.
Not by anyone.
Disclaimer: I do not own Roswell.
Rating: Teen
Summary: Liz's deals with the realization that she has lost Max forever.
Pairings: M/L
Setting: Takes place directly after The End Of The World
Spoilers: Definetly The End Of The World. There are passing phrases that can be linked to Tess, Lies and Video Tape, Sexual Healing and Destiny. There may be others.
It wasn’t until she was alone that she finally realized what she had done.
Sure she said the words, committed the actions and saw the effects that her actions had but it wasn’t until she was truly alone that she realized the full extent of what she had done.
She had changed history, the past wouldn’t repeat itself. She should be happy. The earth was safe. But she was miserable and alone.
She the thought she could have weathered through and taken the heartbreak when the Future version of Max was there. He held her hand, convinced her it was the right thing to do, he gave her soft words of encouragement and held her with so much love and reverence that she would have walked through fire if he told her to.
After all he was her husband. She loved him, although it was in another time she still felt that same bond that she felt with her Max in this time.
She felt close to him. She felt his joy when he recounted their wedding day. She felt his sorrow over the deaths of his families and she knew how hard the last few years had been on him.
She didn’t really know. persay But she felt things from him. Not so much flashes but impressions, emotions and the vague impressions were horrific. She felt feelings that were so strong that she couldn't refuse his request. She couldn't see the broken look in his eye and not do everything in her power to stop him from feeling that way. She could see why he was so desperate to change the past.
She was afraid. Not for the world. That was safe for the moment. She was afraid of what the world would mean to her without Max. Even though she had broken his heart she believed that she would be able to get through this. She knew that most of her strength towards the end was coming from Future Max.
He was holding her together because inside she was falling apart. She hadn’t recognized it but he dulled her pain, stunted her loss at least she had a piece of Max still in this life time. It was only after he faded away and ceased to exist that she realized the complete agony she was in.
She created a world where Max wouldn’t marry her. She mourned the loss of their life and she also mourned the life of the man who had come to visit her a few nights ago. It just seemed so wrong that he was wiped away from the timeline as if he had never existed. He deserved to exist.
Technically he didn’t but her soul recognized that he was supposed to. He was a symbol of Max’s love for her, the promises they promised to one another and the fruitation of their romance and meaning to one another.
Fate couldn’t be so cruel as to discard him as though he never existed in the first place. After the gripping agony moved threw her settled a collective numbness.
She was to be alone.
To watch from the outside as Tess and Max grew closer, and at that moment a steady amount of bile moved to her mouth. She remembered an echo of a similar feeling a few months ago.
Right after Tess first arrived and she was forced to witness them making out on the street corner right across from her family diner.
But this feeling was so much worse, because it was inevitable. They had to be together or else the world would end.
She couldn’t stop what was happening more then she could change the weather.
They were destined, betrothed, married if not in the strictest sense it was written in books, in their genes and in the very fate of the world.
She didn’t think she could take being a cliff note or a side romance to Max. He irrevocably changed her life. She would never be the same person that she was before he met her. She would never be normal. She was ruined for any kind of normal relationship now.
How could she kiss another man and compare him to the very first man who made her see stars, how could she touch a man when she would be comparing him to the man who made her very skin glow, how could she ever become close to another person when she would still be remember the flashes that she had from Max. She meant every word she said to Future Max at the end of their time together.
He was it. There would never be another him.
She felt lost, she was adrift in misery as she began to think of a life without Max. She couldn’t do that. Although it would cut at her heart to see Max become closer to Tess she would grin and bear it just because she couldn’t imagine a life without him in it.
She would distance herself from him for the fate of the world but she would not avoid and extradite herself from him and his orbit. Although she may have denied and hurt him she was still apart of his world. She needed to be apart of his world and God help her she was still going to do everything in her power to help him and protect him and his secret.
She made a decision. The world would be safe she would never speak of the incident with Future Max again and in turn the world would be safe. However her world would have a permanent hole in it because Max left a void that could never be filled.
Not by anyone.