(no subject)
Things I've decided lately:
1. If you didn't know, my grammar kinds of sucks and I'm not the sharpest crayon in toolshed. Lists are simple and let me use broken sentences.
2. Deciding to take the stairs to my Dad's apartment is both a good workout and a fucking dumb idea.
3. When people suggest watching movies like Freddy Vs. Jason because they're good in that horrible way, listen. Sometimes watching absolute crap is great.
4. Watching home movies doesn't suck.
5. I'm kind of a dumbass.
Case in point - We're walking across this ledge while hiking to the top of some famous mountain or something. There are about a hundred signs that all say "Watch your step!" in about eight different languages and Hana keeps freaking out and yelling that we need to be careful. I to balance on one leg, close my eyes and jump around to freak Hana out, because obviously that's the best idea. There is video of me sliding thirty vertical feet on my ass. We actually had to puase while showing the movies to family/friends tonight. They needed a break to stop laughing. At my pain. At my dumb, dumb pain.
6. Leather paints in summer heat means a hot ass. Literally. And figuratively ;)
7. After going to clubs in Japan, I've realised that people dress much less strangely here. I miss it. People were uniqe. I also miss Japanese techno in clubs. They knew to play all kinds of techno. Here we'll still get a random slow dance or something. No. Just, no.
8. I'm trying for ten as that's a nice round number and I like things to be nice and round. I've also realized that double entendree (? aun-taun-dra Damn french bastards. They can just suck some phoentics. Bitch!) are not my strong suit.
9. I spent almost every minute of the last two and a half weeks with Hana. She's one of those people I can just be with all the time and it's never awkward and I never want her to leave. That friend that you can just sit around and watch tv with and it's still fun. What am I supposed to do with her across the country next year?
10. This one isn't mine -- "Now that high school is finally dead and gone, aren't we supposed to be happy? I mean, it's all we've wanted for four years now, so why does it suck? The end of high school was supposed to mean the end of shitty teachers, shitty homework, shitty groups, and the great shittiness that is being a high school kid. That's what I've wanted, not to have to say goodbye to everyone I've known for years. Not leaving people behind. Not leaving everything I've done and everything I've been behind. Why does it have to be the end? Wasn't it supposed to be freeing and enlightening? Why does it mean leaving my life behind? In the months since school ended I finally feel like I've put the broken pieces of my life together. For the first time in years I feel happy and I want to be where I am, I want to know who I know, and I want to live the life I have. And now all I have to look forward to is leaving. If one more person tells me how great it is in college because you get to leave everything you used to be in the past and start over, erase mistakes, I swear to god I'm going to tear someone limb from limb. Mistakes are what make us and I like who I am now. There are always things we want to forget, but forgetting them means we haven't learned from them. I am who I am because of what's happened to me and because of what I've done. For me to revel in the ability to leave myself behind would be a betrayal of everything I always say. High school was supposed to be the gauntlet that let us finally open the gates to our lives. If that's true why does it feel like the doors proclaim 'Abandon Hope'? And now I've bitched at you enough, so I'll just stop and take a breath now Nich."
Yeah, it's not mine, but I like it. Try and read it out loud without taking a breath. It takes tallent to rant like that and not pass out!
Okay. It's now 2:19. I always take forever to write this things. I'm so bad at computers. I don't know how to do anything! I do get to kind of empty my head before I go to sleep though. It's nice.
You wanna know something else I've realized? Every once in a while you just need to get something out. Yell, scream, cry, whatever. It feels good to just let go. So the next time you just have something to say, write it here. You can even write it as a comment here. Or e-mail me. That's private if you want to. isotropicecho@hotmail.com It's nice to be the one who listens too. I don't really pay a lot of attention in the real world, so here it's kind of a change.
-Ethan
1. If you didn't know, my grammar kinds of sucks and I'm not the sharpest crayon in toolshed. Lists are simple and let me use broken sentences.
2. Deciding to take the stairs to my Dad's apartment is both a good workout and a fucking dumb idea.
3. When people suggest watching movies like Freddy Vs. Jason because they're good in that horrible way, listen. Sometimes watching absolute crap is great.
4. Watching home movies doesn't suck.
5. I'm kind of a dumbass.
Case in point - We're walking across this ledge while hiking to the top of some famous mountain or something. There are about a hundred signs that all say "Watch your step!" in about eight different languages and Hana keeps freaking out and yelling that we need to be careful. I to balance on one leg, close my eyes and jump around to freak Hana out, because obviously that's the best idea. There is video of me sliding thirty vertical feet on my ass. We actually had to puase while showing the movies to family/friends tonight. They needed a break to stop laughing. At my pain. At my dumb, dumb pain.
6. Leather paints in summer heat means a hot ass. Literally. And figuratively ;)
7. After going to clubs in Japan, I've realised that people dress much less strangely here. I miss it. People were uniqe. I also miss Japanese techno in clubs. They knew to play all kinds of techno. Here we'll still get a random slow dance or something. No. Just, no.
8. I'm trying for ten as that's a nice round number and I like things to be nice and round. I've also realized that double entendree (? aun-taun-dra Damn french bastards. They can just suck some phoentics. Bitch!) are not my strong suit.
9. I spent almost every minute of the last two and a half weeks with Hana. She's one of those people I can just be with all the time and it's never awkward and I never want her to leave. That friend that you can just sit around and watch tv with and it's still fun. What am I supposed to do with her across the country next year?
10. This one isn't mine -- "Now that high school is finally dead and gone, aren't we supposed to be happy? I mean, it's all we've wanted for four years now, so why does it suck? The end of high school was supposed to mean the end of shitty teachers, shitty homework, shitty groups, and the great shittiness that is being a high school kid. That's what I've wanted, not to have to say goodbye to everyone I've known for years. Not leaving people behind. Not leaving everything I've done and everything I've been behind. Why does it have to be the end? Wasn't it supposed to be freeing and enlightening? Why does it mean leaving my life behind? In the months since school ended I finally feel like I've put the broken pieces of my life together. For the first time in years I feel happy and I want to be where I am, I want to know who I know, and I want to live the life I have. And now all I have to look forward to is leaving. If one more person tells me how great it is in college because you get to leave everything you used to be in the past and start over, erase mistakes, I swear to god I'm going to tear someone limb from limb. Mistakes are what make us and I like who I am now. There are always things we want to forget, but forgetting them means we haven't learned from them. I am who I am because of what's happened to me and because of what I've done. For me to revel in the ability to leave myself behind would be a betrayal of everything I always say. High school was supposed to be the gauntlet that let us finally open the gates to our lives. If that's true why does it feel like the doors proclaim 'Abandon Hope'? And now I've bitched at you enough, so I'll just stop and take a breath now Nich."
Yeah, it's not mine, but I like it. Try and read it out loud without taking a breath. It takes tallent to rant like that and not pass out!
Okay. It's now 2:19. I always take forever to write this things. I'm so bad at computers. I don't know how to do anything! I do get to kind of empty my head before I go to sleep though. It's nice.
You wanna know something else I've realized? Every once in a while you just need to get something out. Yell, scream, cry, whatever. It feels good to just let go. So the next time you just have something to say, write it here. You can even write it as a comment here. Or e-mail me. That's private if you want to. isotropicecho@hotmail.com It's nice to be the one who listens too. I don't really pay a lot of attention in the real world, so here it's kind of a change.
-Ethan