FIC: R: Nevermind The Buzzcocks
Title: Never mind the Buzzcocks (Part 6/8)
Author: Isi
Rating: R
Pairing: Remus/Severus other characters: Regulus, Lucius, James, Lily, Harry, Peter, Sirius.
Challenge: Snupin Santa 2006 at lupin_snape. Join the party!
Summary: A non-magical AU in which we see the world of late 70’s Manchester, and young Severus and Remus’ adoration and emulation of the Sex Pistols. We see this world in two ways. Through Severus’ eyes in the main body of the story and the ‘crackier’ side, through Remus’ various attempts at pulp fiction writing. His work though often clichéd, crosses many genres: Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Western, Horror and Crime Noir Fiction. He hopes you will forgive him, he’s still learning y’know.
Disclaimer: don’t own these characters, just unwrapping them for Christmas.
Warnings: Swearing, drugs/alcohol discussed and used, humour, black humour, sexual situations, moderate descriptions of violence, angst, non-main character death. Cruelty to drummers. Fluff where it counts. Often heavily dialogue based. Verses (and Bridge) are Remus POV then Sev POV, Chorus’s are vice versa. Word count: roughly 23,500 in total (this part about 4,300 )
Notes: Written for maraudersaffair in snupin_santa 2006. Beta'd by the beautiful schemingreader
CHORUS 2
He’d turned up at least.
“Hiya.”
Reg’s beaming face greeted him as he opened his front door. Severus was panicked for a moment until he saw the van. Ok, Remus definitely had turned up.
He didn’t know why he was so nervous about tonight. The practises had gone fine. They were a little bit weird around each other at the beginning of the practises but soon Remus was his argumentative self. The twat had even managed to get one of his songs into the set list, very weird one about vampires and werewolves. Severus had been sort of shocked into allowing it - all that biting and sucking had made him a little bit antsy - considering. Hearing it had inspired a whole string of schemas. ‘Down for the count’. It was called. Severus didn’t know what it was about but it was all right. Even despite the fact that Remus had also somehow managed to talk him into forgoing his ‘kerchunky’ style to a more ‘jingly-jangley’ one. Twat.
As he held the door open for Reg to climb into the back of the van Severus’ eyes met Peter's briefly, who smiled distractedly and continued fiddling with his drumsticks. Severus was tempted to join Peter and Reg in the back, in an attempt to allay that initial weirdness but he decided against it, he didn’t want to mess things up with Remus more than he probably already had done. Not sitting up front in his usual seat might make Remus even more weird with him … or whatever he was. He needed to get past this somehow, needed the band to get back to what they did best. The last thing either of them needed was Reg and Peter asking questions. Severus changing his routine was about as frequent as Sirius hitting the right note.
It was an uncomfortable ride. Severus kept trying to hide his hands in his pockets. That hadn’t been easy to do at the practises. It was a source of much amusement to Peter and Reg. They weren’t blue anymore, but his fingernails looked as though they’d been manicured on Peter's home world. He cast a sideward glance at Remus, his hair looked as it had at their last two meetings …perfect.
As they unpacked the equipment, everyone was silent except for Reg who was as annoyingly chipper as ever. Twat. Thanks to Severus rule of always arriving for gigs an hour early, by the time they had set up all the gear they had time for a drink.
“Let me get these in mate.” Ugh, Black. The posh twat even had an irritating talking voice. Severus looked around to see Remus right behind him and he knew he’d have to play nice. Feeling the bile rise in his throat, he grudgingly agreed. He wasn’t about to let Sirius cause any further trouble, if they got into it now it wouldn’t be good for his already awkward relations with Remus. Severus knew he couldn’t let that happen. If they played then everything else would fall into place, as long as they played everything else would seem insignificant to what they were doing up there in the moment. That whole stupid thing with Remus, however perfect it felt at the time and however fucking heinous it felt afterwards, whether it happened again or whether they both agreed it was a nightmarish exercise and should never be repeated - it wouldn’t matter anymore and they’d be playing the best music this pub had ever seen.
Peter stayed behind with Sirius to help him with the drinks while Remus led Severus and Reg over to the table where some of his friends were already sitting. Shit Reg. Quickly he pulled him aside not noticing the look on Remus face in his unbalanced attempt to attempt to keep the balance.
“Look, I know you don’t like him, but-”
“I know.” Reg said eyeing his brother. “You don’t think he can really get one over on me do you?” he grinned, “Don’t worry, when Remus and Peter are around I’ll be the nicest little brother on the face of the Earth.”
Severus should have known better. He was sure the only reason Reg was alive was to irritate his brother and what better way to do that than to make friends with his friends. He watched as Reg practically skipped over to the table, following close behind him.
“Everything alright there?” Remus’ voice was quiet and flat. It was the first time they’d spoken to each other about something other than music since… well, since it happened.
“Fine” he said trying to make it sound as believable as possible, even adding a smile. He hoped it didn’t look as twisted as it felt. The sick feeling in his stomach didn’t help, and indeed, wasn’t helped.
“Everything fine here?” Remus looked at him through a fringe of wayward, perfectly bright, blue spikes. He actually looked nervous of Severus’ reaction.
“Of course.” Perhaps it was because he was caught off guard but Severus replied so quickly his brain didn’t have time to censor the untwisted smile that played about his lips. Severus had been so preoccupied with figuring out what to do to get Remus talking to him normally again, he’d never even considered the possibility that Remus might have been worrying about the same thing. It was a relief. As Remus leaned in closer, Severus realised he had no idea what he would do if getting each other talking wasn’t the only thing Remus wanted to do.
“Can we talk …later?”
Nodding dumbly, he also realised he’d overruled his brain again.
“Hey, aren’t you going to introduce your friends you two?” Thank God. Severus didn’t know who this redhead was but he could have kissed her, her timing was perfect. He waited for Remus to introduce him; he called Severus ‘the best lead guitarist in the world”. He didn’t blush - It was the truth - but as he shook hands with the girl, Lily and her boyfriend James he was glad that Remus seemed to agree.
“This is Reg,” Reg was true to his word, he was the jovial charmer he always was, he even accepted his drink from Sirius with a smile and a “Cheers, Bruv.” Severus looked at his watch, 25 minutes. It couldn’t come quick enough.
“You look nervous as hell mate. Here, get that down your neck.”
“Aw, cheers Sirius, but I should have told you. Sev doesn’t drink.” Looking up at the mention of his name he saw Sirius looking rather green.
“Oh, miles away…sorry” Severus added slightly later than he should have.
Remus had taken his pint of lager and gulped a half. Jesus, he really could knock them back.
“No matter, I’ll see it doesn’t get wasted.” Remus grinned at his friend. “What d’you want? A coke? Lemonade?” Severus was going to tell him that it didn’t matter but he was up and brushing past him, already en route to the bar.
“Anything.”
Remus’ hand splayed across his back as he reached forward to get the remainder of Severus unwanted pint. “I might get thirsty on the way”. He winked. In that fraction of a second before he went to the bar Severus could have kissed him. Despite the gulp that rose in his throat it wasn’t that much of a shock - after all it seemed that his instincts and his brain had had a falling out this evening. He’d have to keep that in check.
“He did that on purpose, the tight bastard,” Sirius laughed to James but it was a hollow laugh. He didn’t look as smug as usual; in fact he looked rather sick. Probably realising that his plan wasn’t going to work. Twat.
“What you looking so funny for Pete? You look as nervous as Spider.” The nickname must have been a Black family thing.
“Well, there’s something I want to tell you but I’d better wait for Remus.”
“Ooh, international man of mystery” James and Lily laughed. Severus hated in-jokes he wasn’t in on. They waited a couple of minutes. James was talking to Reg about football for some reason. Reg would never play football, he might mess his hair up. Severus kept one eye on his watch, hoping it would move faster.
“An Irn Bru for sir,” he held the bottle over his arm as though he were a waiter in a fancy restaurant.
“I see you did get thirsty then,” Severus sneered and took the bottle, “Ta. Take it easy will you, I want you to be able to play tonight.”
“Nice little missus you’ve got there, Remus.” James jibed. Severus had already started his ‘keep the peace’ laugh when Remus spoke,
“James. Fuck off.” He grinned a cheesy grin to James and sat down roughly making Severus wonder whether he’d had a drink or two before he’d left the house.
“Err…” Once he was sure everyone was looking his way Peter began slowly, he really did look nervous, “I’ve got a bit of news. I don’t know how to say it really.” He laughed goofily and scratched the back of his head, “Remus, you remember Dora? I know you do, James but well; we ran into each other a while back and… we’re kind of going out. Well not ‘kind of’ we are going out, actually we’re well… she’s just found out she’s pregnant.”
There were various versions of ‘congratulations’, and ‘good on you’ until James spoke.
“Oh but she’s being transferred down south.”
“That’s the thing I wanted to tell you all, y’see I’m going to be moving down there with her.”
“What?”
Remus and Severus had said the word simultaneously. Remus sounded like a disappointed whine whereas Severus sounded absolutely fucking furious. All that effort with Remus, all that worrying about trying to keep the band together and they’d still lose someone.
Fucking typical…
That’s when he caught Sirius’ narrowed eyes. Severus knew enough about both to know that he was being studied and gloated to. So that’s how it was going to be.
“Aw Peter congratulations mate but man, what about the flat? You could have said something sooner, when are you going? Is it straight away? Or will you be waiting until after the wedding, when is the wedding? Are you even getting married?
Severus really wished he did drink, now seemed like a fucking perfect time to drown his sorrows. He looked at Remus as he rattled on, he wasn’t really taking in his words-- they were for Peter not him anyway. He just looked. After everything it wasn’t Remus who’d left. He didn’t know what that meant but he was oddly grateful. At the same time he knew that Remus would leave - eventually without his mate Peter, what would be the point of him staying? With Sirius being a twat Remus would be forced to choose - unless he sorted Sirius himself. Suspicious, black eyes wandered back to Sirius who was also watching Remus, he looked almost nervous. Why?
“Is Dora moving in until you go? Just cause that’ll be a bit weird y’know what with her being a set up for me but at least the bills wont be as bad with three of us--” He didn’t stop his rattling babble even when the whole table was looking at him oddly, only after Severus stood up and stared right at him did he finally slow down.
“What?” Remus added innocently blinking up at him. “You know you’re like an angry wasp in a hospital when you make that face,” Remus chuckled. Severus expression had turned to one of seething anger.
It all made sense, let me get these in mate’ ‘get that down your neck mate.’
“What did you give him? ” Severus demanded banging into the table and scaring the life out of Sirius in the process. The bastard had a right to look green.
“Recognise the symptoms do you? And I didn’t give it to him I gave it to you, but your too much of a fairy to have a real drink.”
“Fucking idiot, you didn’t think to mention it when one of your best mates started to drink it! What was it?”
Sirius seemed aware that the eyes of his friends were on him. He looked uncomfortable.
“The new stuff your best mate in the corners been flogging all night.”
Severus couldn’t believe the relief that washed over him. At least it was from Malfoy. It’s definitely safe. He held Remus face in his hands looking at his pupils again,
“How much?” they didn’t hear him, the whole table seemed to have erupted into hushed arguments,
“How. Much?” he repeated louder.
“Lots and lots,” Remus smiled up at Severus adoringly.
“Just one.” Just one. Fucking idiot. If he’d gone to anyone other than Malfoy it could have been cut with anything.
“Look, is he going to be alright? Other people do it and they’re ok. I didn’t mean to-”
“Didn’t mean what? I know exactly what you meant to do. But yes, he’ll be ok”
“I’m fine, don’t worry about me - I feel fucking fantastic.”
“Twat.” He had to smile, of course he made sure only Remus saw it, “You feel alright now but tomorrow you’ll feel like shite.” Not that Remus would see much of tomorrow; he’d sleep right through most of it.
“Come on”
“Where we going?”
“The bogs.”
“Again?”
“You’re going to puke, you’ll feel better.”
“I feel better now.”
“Shut up and do it.”
“ ‘K” if Severus knew Remus would be this compliant and he’d been as stupid as Sirius he might have spiked him before every practice session. As it was he followed him to the loos, checking to make sure he was walking ok. Remus really did seem fine, albeit a little more alert and prone to saying what was on his mind. Thankfully the loos weren’t occupied, Severus wasn’t really happy with the thought of hearing what on Remus’ mind himself, never mind other people overhearing. He crouched down behind Remus in the stall.
“Look Remus, you can either stick your fingers down your throat or I’ll do it for you.”
“You don’t have to use your fingers” he wrinkled up his face, mirroring Severus expression then laughed before putting his fingers in his mouth, “I know, thoo methy.”
Severus averted his eyes and leaned his head back against the stall wall. He didn’t want to know what diesel vomit looked like - it looked bad enough going in. He couldn’t quite believe the oddness of the situation.
Remus retched.
Severus wasn’t good at flirting; he never saw the point in it. You either fancied someone or you didn’t, it was just chemistry.
Oh, there he goes.
The realisation that he was being flirted with in perhaps the most dysfunctional way ever wasn’t the shock one might expect but it certainly added confusion to something that was already pretty complicated. He didn’t know what it meant. Yes, Severus was a genius, but he was genius enough to know he wasn’t a normal genius.
When the retching noises subsided he concluded it was safe to look. Remus was the absolute epitome of punk perfection: the bad beer and good drugs, looking thoroughly debauched and worshiping at the porcelain altar. He frowned at his hand, which was definitely not the epitome of punk perfection; it had seemingly taken it upon itself to rub soothing circles on Remus’ back.
“Feeling better?”
“No. I feel like I’ve just thrown up, I felt better before.”
“All done?”
“Yeah”
“Go on then, get yourself cleaned up - You’ll still be a bit hyper for a good couple of hours, but you’ll get to sleep tonight at least.” Remus stood and paused beside Severus, who jumped as a hand came up to brush his cheek.
“Thanks for making me feel worse,” Remus smiled and went to wash up. Severus didn’t mention his breath.
“How’s he doing?” Peter stuck his head around the door startling Severus.
“Better.”
“Worse!” came the muffled reply as Remus scrubbed his face with water.
“I’ll stay with him Spider,” he nodded towards the door. Christ, what else could happen? So much for an easy gig. Peter pulled the door to.
“Spider, Reg has gone after Sirius."
“He left?” Twat.
“Just now, we are still playing aren’t we? I saw him go out after Sirius and thought I’d better tell you.”
“I’ll get him.” Since when did he have to referee the bloody Black brothers? “And YES! We're still playing.” They might be a soon-to-be-broken up band, but they were going out they’d go out in a fucking blaze of glory even if it meant taking the pub with them. He reached the car park in time to see the trademark smug grin punched off Reg’s face.
“Reg!” Reg looked up wiping the blood of his nose, as Severus stalked towards them.
“Get inside and get ready we’re still playing.” He looked between Severus and Sirius then nodded before doing as he’d asked. Sirius laughed,
“You running after my old man now like you run after Malfoy? Is this where you tell me to leave Reg alone?”
“Not really. Reg, I’m not worried about. Look Black, I can’t stand the fucking sight of you and no sane person on Earth can stand the sound of you but for some reason Remus actually seems to like you.”
“So?”
“I don’t know what you think you know about me and Malfoy but you’re wrong. Remus is your friend and he’s my… band mate. I don’t see why it has to be a problem just because we hate each other. We could actually be adults about this.”
“You wouldn’t understand this, probably because you haven’t got any, but he’s my mate. I know you’re in with Malfoy you greasy little prick. I’ve seen you! And Bella’s seen you. What are you? Are you his little pusher up at the college? Do you think I’m just going to let you get Remus into all that shite? Not that it matters now anyway right not much reason to hang around with you any more now the bands splitting up”
Despite all the whisperings of his mini angel and devil selves Severus nearly smiled. Pushing drugs, a man of his talents. Idiot.
“Even if I was a ‘pusher’, I wouldn’t want to get Remus involved in it. I’m telling you now, not to run to Remus with your stupid stories about my career as a criminal mastermind.”
“And I’ve told you-”
“And in return, you wont have to explain to him how the police caught you via an anonymous tip-off and finding a saleable amount of amphetamine sulphate amongst your things. Very recognisable bike that Black, anybody would be able to spot it and hide something that shouldn’t be there… I wonder who your mates would believe even if you tried tell them I was involved? The fairy who doesn’t even drink or the so-called ‘friend’ who spikes people.”
As Sirius stared at him not quite believing what he’d heard, Severus forced his face into a smile, just as smug as Sirius’ own on the surface, but underneath the smile was as messy and hollow as he felt himself. He might have won victory over Sirius but it was a pyrrhic victory. In doing so he’d just lost Remus. The band, everything, it was all over and he only had himself to blame.
Blaming Sirius seemed the better option though.
Remus smiled at his reflection, the brilliant blue spikes of his hair reflecting the strip lighting and shining like a crown. My crown, he thought. Tonight he was a king. Tomorrow he’d be a peasant again; somewhere in the back of his head he probably knew that. He’d pay, he’d feel like shit all day but right now, tomorrow seemed as distant as the ships orbiting Sirius. So what if he’d pay for it tomorrow. This was fucking amazing. Tonight he was amazing. He could do anything, be anything, say anything, and have what he wanted. No one could stop him; he had the crown to prove it. He wanted to move, to dance, to play, and to scream. The best part was he was getting paid for it. Perfect.
And it was. They played like demons from hell - wait, no. Severus wouldn’t like that analogy. They played like the filthy, dirty, little imperfect humans they were. The crowd loved them. Lily and James were in heaven - bouncing away all night. It was the first time they’d heard ‘Hogwarts’. It was nice that they got to see them play; it might be the last time for a while what with Peter moving away. Nicer still for their friends that they enjoyed themselves and enjoyed the music.
At the end of the show while Reg and Peter were dismantling the drum kit Remus had asked Severus to play the Robin Hood song and sang a perfect punk rendition of “your lupins or your life” as an impromptu encore. And all night, ever since Remus took to the mike and saw the way Severus was looking at him, he’d played with the power, assurance, knowledge and complacency of a man who knows without a shadow of a doubt that he’s on a promise. Perfect. Dora turned up at the end of her shift and after packing up the van; Peter said he was heading off back to her flat. They’d have the flat to themselves for their ‘talk’. Remus could quite get used to this royalty thing.
He drove them home; Severus was so worried he left half-moon nail impressions in the dashboard. Reg had offered to come back to the garage and help them unload. Thankfully Severus told him he’d do it - that he wanted to ‘make sure Remus was alright’. Remus was still ‘fucking fantastic’ but of course he didn’t tell that to Reg who might have thought he felt ‘too fantastic’ to unload properly and come along anyway, he was off his tits but he wasn’t stupid.
Remus wasn’t too fussed about unpacking the van after they’d dropped Reg off and got back to the garage, far too eager to ‘talk’. Severus insisted though so Remus increased energy was put to good use. Severus had even asked him to carry his amp with him into the flat; he wanted to be able to practise at home. It seemed odd to Remus that after months of the equipment being stored there that suddenly Severus would change his mind, but he was past caring as long as Severus came upstairs with him. So he carried said amp up 15 flights of stairs and didn’t argue. Severus never used the bloody lift. As soon as they were inside Remus put the amp down, and after taking the guitar from Severus and carefully standing it up against the wall he took Severus and carefully stood him up against the wall too.
Remus smiled sloppily. He’d finally discovered the secret to keeping Severus quiet. No arguments, no snide comments, he wasn’t even attempting to call him a twat. He just stood in wide-eyed silence. His mouth appeared caught mid-speech, letting out only warm moist air. Inches apart, Remus could feel it ghosting over his face, through his skin, energising him further with each ragged breath, taking him over unlike any drug he’d ever experienced and much more powerful. Remus’ world was reduced to that glorious feeling and the sound of his own building bass-line, his heart pounding and the throb of blood pulsing through his veins. He knew just where that blood was heading.
It was different, unreal, surreal …but not wrong, nothing this good could be wrong and besides, he was still a king until whatever this shit was wore off, he had divine rights and his will was law. There was a twitch in his trousers, his body rewarding him for finally catching on to what it had known for some time. Remus leaned in and experimentally traced the line of Severus bottom lip with the tip of his tongue; he paused feeling Severus' breathing increase. He wanted to say something, anything, to let Severus know about his amazing revelation. It was obvious how Severus felt about last time; he didn’t want to ‘be’ what doing this would make him. He wanted to tell him that none of that mattered, not tonight, if he could only just see... Severus seemingly read his mind.
“Shut up.”
Remus guessed that was their talk well and truly done with. He hadn’t even said a word at least he didn’t think he had; he thought he saw a brief flash of annoyance …possibly sadness cross Severus’ features as hands reached up to his face and he was pulled forwards, their lips smashing together. So fucking perfect…
The stud in Severus tongue, Jesus it was almost enough to make Remus think that maybe Severus had been lying to him all along. He wasn’t just some imperfect human, he was an angel - perhaps a fallen one - but some heavenly creature masquerading as human and trying to take him to heaven bodily. Remus wouldn’t have minded either way.
Hands followed, exploring, teasing and hopefully mapping out for future reference. But the way Severus was touching him, Jesus, it was like he was never going to see him again, as though he were a thing to be cherished, savoured and remembered. But if that’s really what he thought, Severus had another think coming. Divine rights - he was a king and Severus was his quee- no not that, Sev would fucking kill him. Severus was just… his.
So fucking perfect…
Part 7